Tonight,I am feeling pretty fair.I had a pretty smooth work day today.But it did go by slowly.But I managed to get a lot done.
I also managed to finally,on my break,get ahold of a friend of mine who I have been trying to get ahold of the past several days.He said that he had gone away for a while because he felt that he needed to get out of town for a while.I was relived that he was okay and well.I was worried about the guy because I did not hear from him and it really made me think that there was something wrong.But I am relieved that he is okay and that he is well.I am still looking forward to getting together with him and he is still hoping for the same thing.I hope that something will happen.I have not really seen this guy face to face in quite a while and I am hopingthat soon,we can see each other again.We have been having great conversations and that is great.Again,we are hoping to get together again.I hope that something comes of this.
When I got home,I managed to get an errand done for my mom and I also got some donuts from a local Tim Horton's.It was a nice change of pace from having ice cream.I enjoyed the nice little snack.I also managed to relax a bit in the afternoon.That too was great.
I am now at home relaxing.I am getting ready for tomorrow.I only have to do a little bit tomorrow and that is good.Tomorrow is simply a pick-up day and I am hoping that the pick-up goes smoothly.Tomorrow night is also my support group meeting at the church and I am hoping that the meeting also goes well.I am hoping that the day overall goes well.
I rescheduled my appointment with the medication manager at the local hospital.I did it this morning before leaving for work.Though it is only almost a wek away,I am hoping that the meeting goes well.
That was my day today and my hoped for day tomorrow.FJ

Happy Labor Day,Everybody!
Tonight,I am feeling okay.I had a pretty fair day today.I did not do too much.I never have much to do on holidays like this one.I stayed home for much of the day and I took it easy.It was a nice sunny day with only a small amount of humidity.But it was pretty good.I did not leave the house very much today except to run a coulpe of personal trips.I went out to get a couple slices of pizza as a small appetizer to tie me over until dinner.After dinner,I went out to get a battery for my watch so I can keep track of the time.My watch wore out one night and I waited to get a battery until I had the money.It was a cheap watch but the battery was replaceable and it does keep good time.After that,I came home and finished my personal PC work.It was a lot but I got it done.
I am now at home relaxing.It is evening at the moment and I am getting ready for the next day,which is a work day.I am hoping that the day goes by smoothly.I have been on an emotional rollercoaster as of late and I see,as far as this moment,that it is not going to end very soon.But I am hanging in there and I am still hoping that things will start working out for me.As stated previously,I am awaiting a book by a friend of mine,which he autographed,and I can not wait to check it out.I am still wondering how my contributions came out in the book.Again,I can hardly wait to receive it and to read it.WOW!I am hoping that it is a great work.
As stated,tomorrow is a work day.I am hoping that the day goes by smoothly.
That was my day today and my hoped for day tomorrow.FJ

Tonight,I am feeling okay.I had a pretty good day today.I did not do too much.I simply went and did some personal shopping for myself.I had to pick up a few things that I really needed.It was nothing much.It was just a few odds and ends.But I got it out of the way.The day was pretty nice and I had a pretty good time out today.
Last night,my night of entertaining the crowd went great.It was a pretty awesome night.I even tried out one new song last night.It was an old David Allan Coe song.I heard it on the juke box and I thought that I would do it.It was pretty tough to sing but I managed it very well because I did get a very positive reponse from the crowd.The rest of the songs were songs that I reaquainted myself with.I am hoping to try out a few new stuff this coming Saturday and I am hoping that it all works well.Again,it was a wonderful night and I had a blast.
I had a talk with a friend of mine from New Jersey and he's doing good.We talked for a short time but it was great to talk with him.Afterwards,I took it easy for a while.I also layed down for a bit on my bed listening to a few of the old fashioned 78's that I bought a few weeks ago from the old man at that garage sale.For the rest of the evening,I have not really decided what I am going to do.I might go out for a drink and socialize with a few people or I might just stay home.Whatever I do,I hope that it helps me in a positive way.
Tomorrow is Labor Day.It is nothing special because I always have a day off on Monday.But it is great to have a nice holiday where I can do some stuff.There will be nothing much open tomorrow.So,I just might take it easy and concentrate on the week ahead.
That was my day today.My night last night and my hopes for tomorrow.FJ

Tonight,I am feeling hopeful and optimistic.I had a pretty good day today.I went over to that friends house to pick up the money that he owed me and he had it.That was great.Afterwards,I went to a shopping mall in my town to get a haircut.I had to wait for nearly an hour to get it because there was a lot of customers in the mall and even the hair cut place.I did not mind.If I had to wait.I had to wait.The wait was well worth it.After the near hour was up,I went in and got my hair cut the way I wanted it.It was wonderful.After that,I stopped at a supermarket in my area to pick up a little thing for dinner on Monday.I also had to go to a drug store to pick up something for my mom.Overall,not too bad of a day.
When I got home,I took a bath and shaved.I ate dinner after cleaning up.It was just a small pizza.But it was great.After dinner,I took it easy and finished my personal PC work.I also relaxed in my room and listened to a little music.
Tonight is my night to go out and sing up a storm.I am hoping that the night goes well.Though I rarely,if ever,have an off night,I still hope for things to go well.You never know what might happen.But I am keeping my head up and I am remaining hopeful and optimistic.I still hope for a great night.
Tomorow is Sunday.I have not made any plans but whatever I do,I hope that it will help me in a very positive way.Monday is the holiday.I might just stay home and take it easy because there will not be too many places open.
That was my day today.My hopes for the nights tonight and my hopes for the rest of the weekend.FJ

Tonight,I am feeling pretty good.I had a very smooth work shift today.It was so smooth that it went very fast and I was glad when the time was over.After the loads that I had to get done were finished,I simply bagged them and dropped them off at the drug/alcohol rehab center.Afterwards,I went to the store for my mom and picked up a couple of things for the home.One thing was for dinner and another was strictly for the home.Overall,a pretty smooth work day.
When I got home from work,a video that I had been waiting on had arrived.I was worried that it would not show up because I was checking the Track & Confirm via the USPS website and there was no record of the shipment over the last few days.But today,when I got home,there it was in a Priority Mail envelope and I was excited.It was the ZOOM:Best of the '70's video.I even watched it after the local news tonight and it was awesome.It brought back some pretty good memories of my childhood before my dad took me to live with him.Before my dad took me away from here,I had some really pleasant memories here at this home but that "brief" visit with my dad,which lasted nine months,was what really mixed me up.I went from being a happy kid to being an angry young man later on struggling with this SSA gender identity disorder.This was the root cause of my struggles alongside the rejection by other males and the sexual abuse that I endured.But the pleasant stuff that I remembered watching the video was awesome and it was great to revisit the happiness that I felt at that particular time.But now,I am heading in the right direction and I am still working on overcoming and recovering from this rut that I am currently in.
I am glad that the weekend is here.I can hardly wait to entertain the crowd tomorrow at the place where I sing.I always look forward to that every Saturday night and I am hoping that the night goes well.
The only disappointing thing was that when I called that friend of mine who I have been trying to get together with,he was not home or maybe he was sleeping.I will call him again tomorrow afternoon and see if he is doing good.I also have to drop in on a friend who owes me money.But mainly,I want to see how he's doing and see if him and his live in girlfriend is doing good.
That was my day today and my hoped for day tomorrow.FJ

Tonight,I am feeling okay.I had a pretty smooth work day today.The shift went by pretty good and fast.It was like nothing happened.But I did get a lot done and that was great.Even the laundry pick-up today went by well.There was no mess to clean.I simply picked up the laundry and brought it to the work place to sort it out and get it done.Again,a very smooth work shift.
I also had an appointment with the substitute sexual abuse support counselor today and that meeting went by well.The lady that my regular counselor substituted for me is actually great.We talked about my life and some of the things that had happened when I was younger.The session was pretty short but I don't mind.I would much rather stretch it out over several sessions rather than talk about everything in one.That way,I always have some stuff to talk about each and every session and that way,my mind doesn't draw a blank when I get to the office for each and every session.Again,it was a great session and I am looking forward to the next one.
After the session,I did some grocery shopping for my mom because she needed some stuff for dinner tomorrow.It was not much.It was just several little things that I needed to get so we could have what my mom would like to fix.I am hoping that it all turns out well.Tomorrow is also pay-day and then there is the three day Labor Day weekend.Of course,Monday is always a day off to me so I am used to the thing.Still,I am just glad that there is a holiday coming up so I can concentrate on the next work day.
Earlier this afternoon,I had a talk with a friend of mine from North Carolina.I was surprised to hear from him so soon.I left a message on his voice mail and I did not expect to hear from him so soon.He told me that the book that he is working on is finished and ready to be sold.He also informed me that my copy is going to be placed in the mail today so I can receive it in a few days.I can hardly wait to get it.It is a book where I contributed some stuff to and I can hardly wait to see how my contributions come out.He also gave me some affirming words about my participation in the men's online inquiry forum.He told me that I was a very courageous man in sharing all of my life within the group and for being honest with the men in the forum and that I should keep it up.He also told me that I was one of the founding members in the forum.All of that made me feel a bit better and that was awesome to hear those words.I always enjoy talking to him because he always knows what to say at the right time.Again,I can hardly wait to receive that book.I can also hardly wait to read it.
Tomorrow is a work day.I am hoping that the shift goes well.After that,it's the weekend.
That was my day today and my hoped for day tomorrow.FJ

Tonight,I am feeling a little bit better than yesterday.Today was simply a pick up day and that went great.There was no mess to clean nor was there any problems of any sort.After dropping off the laundry at work site and sorting it out,I went straight home.While I was out doing my job,I did a special virus scan on my computer to see if there was anything in my database that should not have been in there because of the problems that I was having yesterday regarding why the screens were freezing on me.Thankfully,there was nothing in my computer database that woudl cause this.There were no viruses or spyware.It was a relief and I felt better about that.I also took a nap when I got home because I still felt a little tired due to a lack of sleep last night.The nap made me feel better.After my nap,I finished my personal computer work.
The current scandal from Washington concerning Senator Craig,who was caught trying to come on to that other guy in that restroom,really brought back things from my past.I started getting mental pictures of some of the things that I used to do in search of anonymous sex with other guys.Whenever I had anonymous encounters,they happened just about anyplace.Most of the times I had anonymous sex,which consisted mostly of me performing oral sex on another guy,happened in places like school bathrooms,in bushes or wooded areas surrounded mostly by trees so we could hide anywhere while I performed the sexual favor(?)on the other guy.It's a wonder why I never got caught doing that to them in those places.Sometimes I wished that someone did catch me mainly because I wanted to stop me and ask "WHY!?" or maybe try to steer me away from it.Yes it did bring back a lot of painful stuff that I was trying to put out of my mind but now they are coming back in the forms of mental pictures.It's like watching a video of yourself performing this activity non-stop on those other guys.I only performed the sexual act because it gave me a feeling of something.It was not a sexual feeling but as I later learned,it was a feeling of fulfillment that I received because I was looking to feel like a man and wanted something that I lacked.I wanted to be masculine and the feeling that sucking the cocks of other guys until they ejaculated in my mouth,which was followed by my swallowing of their ejaculate,was because I wanted masculinity and I was actually sucking them off just to be masculine.Of course,I was to later learn that giving blowjobs was no way of achieving this.The more you gave.The more emptiness you will feel.First,you will feel fulfilled but the feeling is temporary.The emptiness always comes back when the feeling of fulfillment wears off and you're back to where you were before you performed oral sex on the other guy.I also loved the feel that another man's genitals were giving me.That is what led me to become addicted to performing this activity on other guys because I felt that it was something that I really wanted to do and that being attracted to men and performing oral sex on them was an inevitability rather than a choice.Plus,I wanted to feel that good feeling every time I got the opportunity to do just that.I also have to admit that there were times that I did not want to because,at the same time,there were also conflicting emotions over this.While I felt that I was enjoying this and that it was inevitable that I did that,I still felt that this was not right to do nor did it make sense.But when they exposed their hard cocks,I gave in.Again,I was enjoying it even though I felt that this was not the thing for a guy like to do to another guy.But at the same time,I felt that since this was who I was and also felt that this was something that I had to do because of my cravings to feel those "false positive" feelings every time,I felt that there was no choice and that acting out was inevitable and that what I was doing and who I felt that I was in that sense was the essence of who I really was.But now,I am smarter and I now know that acting out is a choice and not an inevitability.Whenever I get the feelings of emptiness,I can now find healthy ways of fulfilling my needs and how I can feel like a man without performing anything sexual on a man.Acting out sexually is a choice and not something I have to do all because of the environmental factors that lead me to become Homosexual(i.e.Gay)and also,the years of sexual abuse that I endured all because I was being used as a little plaything for all those selfish bastards who did not care about how I felt regarding this stuff.Yes,I admit it.There were times that I did because I wanted to do it because they were the moments when I was really hungry and starving and I was going crazy about feeling that way and saying to myself,but not loudly,"I just gotta suck some guy's dick!I am starving!I gotta suck some guy off!I need to feel those feelings again!I need swallow some guy's cum!I gotta suck some guy's dick!"When the opportunity presented itself,I gave in when asked and I did feel better.But again,the haunting reality of emptiness would come back after those good feelings faded and as usual,I was back to where I started from.But again,I know that I am now free from being enslaved to the image of a naked man with an erection.I am glad that I can now fulfill my needs in a healthy way and not perform anything sexual on a guy.I now have knowledge and I can now think before I act.It is great that I no longer have to perform oral sex on another guy to feel fulfilled.If I continued to do that everytime I turned around,I would be doing that for the rest of my life and to forever be addicted to giving blowjobs until the day I die.Thank God I'm free.I stil get the desires but now,I can choose whether to act out on them or not.
My support group meeting at the church tonight went great.It was wonderful to relieve myself of some more emotional baggage and share what went on with me during the last few days.It was wonderful to be heard and to hear the other men.I am looking forward to next week's meeting.I hope that it goes as well as tonight's.
Tomorrow is another work day.I am hoping that the shift goes well.
That was my day and my hoped for day tomorrow.FJ

Tonight,I am feeling mixed emotions.The work day went by smoothly but for much of the day,I was very depressed.I did not know why that I was.It just happened.I guess that I was still disappointed that I did not get to see the medication manager over at the local hopsital yesterday.I was also feeling somewhat tired.Again,the work day went by smoothly but I was feeling depressed.I am hoping that I will feel better after a good night's sleep.
This afternoon,when I got home,I simply took it easy for a while before doing anything.Though the work day went well,I was tired and I thought that I would rest and take it easy for a while.I did do my personal computer work this afternoon but I had some computer issues.My computer froze on me twice today.It was so bad that I had to pull the plug on it to unfreeze it and start all over again.I did go out earlier this evening looking for herbal tea that can help ease my mood when I get the occasional spell of the blues.Today was no exception as I was feeling down.
I guess another reason I am feeling down is because I am trying to initiate helathy relationships with other guys.You see,I gave my phone number to a few guys that I knew in hopes that they would call me and we can arrange a little get together.But I have not heard anything from them and I am wondering what is going on.I also know a few guys who do have an addiction to sex and I think that this is all they care about.It is a shame when a guy like me who is struggling with emotional issues is trying to seek support from his fellwo man and he is not getting it.Nobody told me that this was going to be easy but this is ridiculous.What is the problem?Is there something I did wrong?If so,What is it?I would like to know.The mere fact that I have not heard from them is what's contributing to my depression.I will keep trying to initiate these things.I am still holding on to the hope that something will happen.
Tomorrow is simply a pick-up day.I am hoping that this goes well.Tomorrow night is my support group meeting at the church.I am hoping that the meeting goes well,too.
That was my day today and my hoped for day tomorrow.FJ

Tonight,I am feeling mixed emotions.The reason why I am feeling this way is because I had high hopes for attending that appointment today with the medication manager over at the local hospital but it was cancelled.Apparently,the manager did not come into the office today and the appointment recording secretary called me to inform me of the cancellation.I have to call the hospital back in the near future to reschedule the appointment.I am hoping that I get ahold of her soon so I can do that.I had high hopes but those hopes came crashing down.OH WELL!
I did manage to find a suitable replacement for the day.I went to visit a friend of mine who owned a music store to show him the Elvis video that I bought a few nights ago.He told me that it was a good find and that I should take good care of it.After that,I had a pasta lunch at a small local restaurant.I also ran an errand for my mom and I stopped at a couple of Salvation Army thrift shops and found some more collectable records at both of them.Despite the disappointment,I had a pretty good day but now I have to wait a while before I can unload all of what I wanted to unload today with the medication manager at the hospital.I am hoping that I do not have to wait too long.I am going to call the hospital tomorrow and I am hoping that I can reschedule the appointment sooner than expected.
Tomorrow is a work day.I am hoping that the day goes by smoothly.
That was my day today and my hoped for day tomorrow.FJ

Tonight,I am feeling okay.I had a not too exciting day today.I simply ran a few errands for my mom and went to visit a friend of mine for short time.He is doing pretty good.The only major disappointment of the day was that I was hoping to get together with a friend who I had been hoping to get together with but he was not home.He was out with his girlfriend.Though it did disappoint me,I did manage to talk with him on the phone for a half hour today.He sadi that we would have to play it by ear and see what happens.I am hoping to get together with him soon.I have not seen him in quite some time.I hope that it happens soon.
I did manage to stop at a few garage sales today.I picked up a lot of stuff at one.It was a bunch of video tapes and a couple more record albums.The person running the sale was a person who I had not seen in quite a while.It was an old school mate of mine.It was great to see him.I also ran into a young lady who I have not seen in quite a while.She was surprised that I remembered her and what she used to do in high school and who she used to go out with.It was awesome running into these people after all these years.It was also awesome finding all these great collectables.
Last night,my night of entertaining the crowd was a big success.There was a pretty big crowd at the place last night.It was really neat.I had a blast and it was great.I am looking forward to doing it again next week.
For the rest of teh evening,I have not made any plans.But I think that I might go out and have a drink with a few people at the place where I sing.If I do,I will make it short because I have something that I have to do tomorrow.
Tomorrow is my day off.I do have something that I need to do tomorrow afternoon.I have an appointment with the medication manager at the local hospital.I hope that the meeting with her goes well.
That was my day today and my hoped for day tomorrow.FJ

Tonight,I am feeling great.I had a wonderful day today.As stated yesterday,I went to the shopping mall where the Buffalo Sabres trio of the 1970's known as the French Connection were signing autographs and it was great to see those guys again.Yes it was.I had a wonderful time waiting in the line to get their autographs and it was well worth the wait.I even had a few great talks with some of teh other fans who were waiting to get their autographs as well.I also got a free ticket to another event there.It is to get FREE pictures of some select athletes from many Western New York sports teams on the 11th of September.I can hardly wait for that.I will be meeting a few current Buffalo Sabres players there that day.It will be totally awesome.I can hardly wait for that.It will at 6:oop.m.on the 11th of September.
Tonight is my night to entertain the crowd at the place where I do sing.I am looking forward to this with of enthusiasm and optimism.I am hoping that the night goes well.Though I rarely,if ever,have an off night,I still hope for things to go well.You never know what might happen.
Tomorow is Sunday.I am hoping to finally get together with that old friend who I have been meaning to do that with.I will be calling him tomorrow afternoon to see if it is going to be.I hope that it will be what it will.It would be great to sit face to face with him talking about a lot of things.
That was my day today and my hoped for day tomorrow.FJ

Tonight,I am feeling okay.I had a pretty tough day today.I had to take over for the normal Friday morning cleaner this morning.I got a couple of hours in this morning and I did my normal job in the afternoon.The laundry pick-up was smooth.No mess to pick up at the pick up place.The rest of the day went by smoothly but I was tired.I am glad that I do not have to do that every time.I am used to resting up in the morning while working to keep myself awake so I can go to work in the afternoon on Fridays.But I am greatful for the extra pay.I am going to need it.
I am glad that the weekend is finally here.I am going to do my usual entertaining the crowd tomorrow night.I am hoping that it goes well.I also have other plans for tomorrow.I am going to a shopping mall where I will be meeting the Buffalo Sabres trio from the 1970's known as The French Connection.I always go somewhere when they sign autographs for their fans and this time,there will be pictures taken as well.That will be neat.I am looking forward to that with a lot of enthusiasm.It will be great to get more autographs.
I also had a talk with an old friend tonight.It was that same friend that I was hoping to get together with last Sunday but he was sick.But we are hoping for this Sunday.I hope that it can happen.I have not seen him in quite a long time.I have talked with him over the phone lots of times.But to see him face to face will be great.
That was my day today and my hoped for day tomorrow.FJ

Tonight,I am feeling mixed emotions.I am feeling mostly anger because I had a very difficult day at work today.The day started out promsing and I had a lot of optimism in me as the day started.
But the day turned difficult after I had a run in with a guy who thought his shit didn't stink.The run in was regarding the social club computer.As I have stated previously,there have been some problems in the past regarding the social club computer regarding people not recording their time down and all sorts of stuff,such as pornographic web addresses appearing in the history even when the person who was on there during the specific time was not even logging on to.This time,a guy recorded his time down but it was not the correct time based on the computer clock and also,he was also on too long.At the social club,the rules state that you must record time on and off and you also have to use the computer clock and not the clock on the wall.Plus,when I made a statement what that guy told me about his being unaware of that rule,I simply and politely informed him that "Ignorance Of The Rules Is No Excuse."He jumped to the wrong conclusions,got really angry and threatened me right in front of a female staffer and even had to nerve to swear an even swearing(i.e.profanity)was against the rules.Apparently,the coordinator talked with him and told him that threats against other members were inappropriate and that he would be suspended for a week the next time he did so.Of course,while that might have worked out well,I am still feeling at edge over it because I was angry at that guy for what he did wrong to me.I am hoping that I feel better tomorrow.I am hoping that a good night sleep will help me out.
Tomorrow is a work day.I am working a full day tomorrow.The normal Friday morning cleaner called in sick and I am taking over for the cleaner.I am hoping that the day goes well.
That was my day today and my hoped for day tomorrow.FJ

Tonight,I am feeling pretty good.I had a pretty good day today.I did my typical laundry pick-up today and it went well.There was no mess today for me clean up and after I picked up,I dropped it off at the work site and sorted out the laundry.I left afterwards.I did not make any stops on the way home except to withdraw some money for my mom and have a light lunch at Burger King.It was nothing special.It was just a Rodeo Cheeseburger and after I finished,I drove home.Before I did that,I stopped at a gas station to get some gas in my tank.
When I got home,I simply finished up my personal computer work.It was a lot to do.But I managed to get it done.
For the rest of the afternoon,I simply took it easy and watched some of the special features on my copy of the special unrated and fully extended edition of Seed Of Chucky.It was great.I saw some stuff on there where they talked about why the movie was made and why they felt it should be made.It was interesting to see all of this stuff and learn something new at the same time.
Later this afternoon,I heard from,via e-mail,the guy who I bought records from on Monday.He told me that he searched high and low for his cell phone but never found it.He also informed me that he bought a new one.I replied thanking him for letting me know and I apologized for his inability to find it.
I attended my support group meeting at the church tonight and it was wonderful as always.Once again,it was wonderful to let go of some emotional baggage and hear the stories of the other men.I am looking forward to next Wednesday night's meeting.I hope that it is as wonderful as the last.
Tomorrow is simply another work day.I hope that the shift goes well for me.
That was my day today and my hoped for day tomorrow.FJ

Tonight,I am feeling okay.I had a pretty smooth work day today.It was just the same old same old.But again,it went smoothly and fast.There was a lot to be picked up today and there was also a lot to drop off.I also had a helping hand today in the form of a man that I used to work with and that made me feel pretty good.Afterwards,I went to buy something for my mom and went home.
When I got in,I got a phone call.It was from the guy that I bought the records from yesterday.Apparently,his cell phone was missing.He asked me if I had taken it accidently.I said that I didn't and that if I did,I would've returned it to him.He said that the reason why that he asked was because he left it in his garage and that he really needed it desperately because of his heart condition.I wished him the best of success in finding it and that I do hope that he does.He said Thanks and hung up.After that,I laid down until dinner.We had a light meal.
I also went and picked up some donuts at a local Dunkin Donuts.We had a spare coupon for buy 6 get 6 free and I thought that I would take advantage of this once again.I am always up for something different regarding desserts rather than have the same old stuff every time.It was not a very eventful day but I did get a lot done.
Tomorrow is simply a pick-up day.After that,I will just relax and take it easy for much of the afternoon.After that,I have my Wednesday night support group meeting at the church and I am hoping that it goes well.
That was my day today and my hoped for day tomorrow.FJ

Tonight,I am feeling okay.I had a not too eventful day day today.I woke up today around 12:30 p.m. and was greeted by the unexpected.My grandnieces and grandnephew came over to spend the afternoon here.Yes they did.I don't mind but I was a little disappointed because I was hoping for a nice quiet afternoon at home but I did not get it.I know that I won't always get the things that I feel I deserve but having them over when they do at times fight a lot especially when they are on the couch and they sometimes unintentionally hurt themselves and make noise.Don't get me wrong,I know that kids are going to be noisy and that they can be unpredictable in their actions but it is really not a good thing to hear kids scream and holler quite a bit.They were here for a few hours and their mother,my niece,picked them up.
While they were over here,I went out for a while.I stopped over a guy's house who was hanging on to some records for me.When I got there,I checked them out and bought them all.They were mostly old fashioned 78's,where some of them still looked like new and unplayed.It is hard to believe that quite a bit of them looked like brand new and that they were also now being cared for in a good caring home.I also had a couple of record albums added to the set.I also went and had a light but late lunch to tie me over until dinner.
When I did get home,I stayed in my room upstairs for the rest of the afternoon.Of course,being up there was not a very good idea though I did need some quiet time and privacy,I wound up relapsing by masturbating again.I am hoping that this does not happen again.I did ask for forgiveness from the creator and he even helped me to forgive myself for that.Still,it did bring me down for a short while and it was devastating to fail.But I am slowly feeling better about this and I am hoping that tomorrow,I will feel much better.
Last night,I did go out for a quick drink.I hung out with some of the guys at the place where I sing and entertain.I did not do any singing.I just hung out for a few minutes and had a quick drink,which was a bottle of non-alcoholic beer.I do take psychiatric medication and that is why I could not have any alcohol in my system so that when I took it,I had nothing to worry about.I did another scan on my computer last night after the anti-virus software caught a virus,which was a Trojan.Dropper virus,in my system.After restarting the computer while having the system recovery turned off,I did the scan and my computer was clean.What a relief.I stopped a virus before it could do any damage to my system.
Tomorrow is a work day.I am hoping that the day goes by well.
That was my day today and my hoped for day tomorrow.

Tonight,I am feeling mixed emotions.I did have a fairly decent day today.I was hoping to get together with that friend that I was talking to on Friday but he wasn't feeling well.Apparently,he went walking for a little over 3 hours and his feet were hurting him.I was disappointed.I was hoping to get together and watch a movie with him that I had told him about.Oh well.But we are hoping that next Sunday will be a better day and that he is hoping that he is feeling better soon.I also hope so.I had high expectations of getting together with him.But I do understand when a person's health isn't teh way they feel it should be because I at times feel the same way myself because I am a human being.But again,we are both hoping that next Sunday will be a better day.For the day,I just ran an errand for my mom and that was it.
Last night,my Elvis Presley tribute was a hit.Each and every one loved my tribute to The King Of Rock & Roll.The night was a huge success and I felt good about what I had accomplished.It was wonderful and it was also fun.Next week,it will be back to normal.I will be doing the dame old type of stuff that I am used to doing.But again,the next tribute will be for George Harrison when the anniversary of his death rolls around alongside the anniversary of the death of John Lennon.That will be 3.4 months away but those will be my next ones.
For the rest of the night,I have not made any plans but Ia m thinking about going out and having a friendly drink.I have not really made up my mind but if I do,I will keep it safe and sane.
That was my day today,my night last night and my hopes for the rest of tonight and tomorrow.FJ

Tonight,I am feeling pretty good.I am also feeling very hopeful and optimistic.I had a pretty good day today.I ran a couple of errands for my mom today.I also managed to check up on a friend that I had been meaning to check up on for a while.He is doing great.That made me feel better.After checking up,I finished the errand.It was nothing much.I had to pick up a few things for the home.While I was doing that,I managed to drop off some things at a Salvation Army thrift shop in my area because somebody threw away a whole bunch of useful stuff in the garbage after an unsuccessful garage sale.I figured that if they did not want the stuff,there were people who could use it.It was great to do a little something for the community and make sure that at least,the stuff can be used by someone who could very well find a use for it.
Right now,I am at home relaxing.I am getting ready for tonight.I am planning to do a tribute to Elvis Presley tonight when I go out to sing tonight.I am hoping that my tribute to Elvis goes well tonight.As stated before,I rarely,if ever,have an off night.I still hope for things to go well.You never know what might happen.Again,I am hoping that the night goes over well.I am getting ready for the night and I am eagerly awaiting the time where I will be there to entertain.I hope that the night is a smashing success.
Tomorrow is Sunday.I am not sure what I will do tomorrow but whatever it is,I hope that it will be something that will give me a positive feeling.
That was my day today and my hoped for night tonight,including my hopes for the day tomorrow.FJ

Tonight,I am feeling pretty good.I had a long talk with a friend who I do not see very much.He is doing good.He told me that he is looking for another job because he quit his previous job and he says that he is looking for something better.I wished him the best of success and that I hoped that it worked out well for him.During the long time we talked,we talked about a lot of things,mostly things that we have in common.It was a very long conversation.We talked for over an hour.The only reason why we did talk for that long because we don't get to talk very much.But again,it was great to talk with him and we had a great time talking with each other.We are still hoping to get together in the near future for a little social thing and I am hoping that it is very soon.
Since I had the day off today,I helped my mom with her grocery shopping.We finally got it done and we were glad to get it accomplished.We bought a lot of stuff to get us through the rest of the month and that was great.We also had a wonderful day getting it done.We also had to hurry home afterwards because we did not like the look of the sky.It looked like that it might storm so we wanted to get home immediately before any possible storm would hit.It did rain on the way home but it was not much.Just a few droplets and a brief heavey downpour before returning to droplets and stopping.We did make it home.After my mom put the groceries away,we had a light dinner.We had a California Styled Salad with Shrimp and Ginger dressing.It was awesome.It was also neat having something different for a change.I enjoyed it and my mom enjoyed it as well.
I can not believe that the weekend is finally here.I am looking forward to singing up a storm tomorrow night.As stated previously,I will be doing a tribute to Elvis Presley because this week is the week of his death's anniversary.Elvis has been dead for 30 years.Where did all the time go?The time went by pretty fast.It is like that his death happened only yesterday.I am hoping that my tribute to the King Of Rock & ROLL goes well.
That was my day today and my hoped for day tomorrow.FJ

Tonight,I am feeling okay.I had a not too eventful day today.The work shift went by smoothly.I did not have any mess to pick up at the pick-up place and that was good.I simply picked up the one bag they had and took it to the work site.I did not do too much.I simply did what I had to do and the time went by fast.After I dropped off the laundry,I simply went home afterwards because my mom was planning to go grocery shopping initially but when I got home,she was not feeling well and said that we could do that tomorrow.I said okay and I took it easy.I relaxed for much of the afternoon because it looked like that it was going to rain as I was driving home and I did not go out and do anything due to the possibility of rain.The only things that came down were a few droplets and that was it.But just in case it was going to do that,I stayed home and relaxed.
I was feeling a little at edge this afternoon.As I was laying down on my bed ,I had a strong urge to masturbate.Images of men in the nude demanding favors from me were also coming back.I tried tossing and turning but the images never left.The only thing that broke it was when I got a phone call from a doctor's office.I was relieved when that happened because I probably would have masturbated if that did not happen.Thank goodness for that phone call.
I have been feeling at edge ever since the death of the member of my support group at the church.I am still feeling the effects of his death.I have really been at edge and I have been feeling angry because he did not have to go.He was taken away from us too early.I still feel his absence and I am missing him terribly.Again,he was taken away too soon.He was at the meeting about two weeks ago and now,he was taken away so suddenly.He was also in the process of reconciling with his family when this happened.I am hoping that I get over this soon.He was like a partner in healing with me at these group meetings.I still find it hard to believe that he's gone.
Tomorow is my first Friday off in a long time.I only have to do a pick-up for the Monday people and I am free for the rest of the day.There is a staff picnic and I have chosen to help my mom with her grocery shopping tomorrow.After I cash my paycheck,I am taking my mom to do her shopping.I am getting an early start to my weekend.I will be doing my usual singing for the crowd on Saturday night.I can hardly wait for that.
That was my day today and my hoped for day tomorrow.FJ

Tonight,I am feeling a little bit better.I did not have too exciting of a day today.I did the laundry pick-up today but I did have to pick up a mess.It was not too big a mess to clean but it was still a mess nonetheless.After picking it up,I dropped the laundry off at the worksite and after doing someone a favor,I finished an errand for my mom and went home.I did my personal PC work and relaxed for the rest of the afternoon.
I did attend my support group meeting at the church tonight and it went great.I got to shed some more emotional baggage and it made me feel better.There was also a lot of reflections about the member that died so suddenly.I guess that we are all going to miss him always.It's still hard to believe that he's gone.
There was an unfortunate accident tonight in the church parking lot.An 11 year old boy ran over a pothole in the parking lot and got hurt after he took a terrible tumble on the concrete.I stayed a little while longer until help arrived.When the ambulance arrived,I waited until it left the parking lot.The boy's father also was there and he followed the ambulance to the local hospital.I said to his father that I hope his son recovers soon.I did pass on that they should work on getting that pothole filled and they said that they would work on it.After that,I went home.
Tomorrow is a work day.I hope that the shift goes well.
That was my day today and my hoped for day tomorrow.FJ

Tonight,I am feeling okay.I had a pretty good day today.The work day went by pretty smoothly.There was a huge pick-up today.I had a lot to deliver to the work spot today and I did get a little bit of it done.During the waits for loads to get done,I managed to watch a movie at the social club and that was pretty good.It was the live action remake of the classic children's book Charlotte's Web.Of course,I did favor the original cartoon version better but this was pretty good in it's own right.Again,I had a pretty smooth day today and that made me feel a bit good.
When I got home,I relaxed and took it easy.Though the day went by smoothly,I was tired because I did not get an awful lot of sleep last night.I don't know why I did not.I guess that it was because of the heat of the previous day that contributed to my lack of sleep.After a nap,I had dinner and did my personal PC work.I also went out to pick up a couple of donuts at a local donut shop and I also turned in some more bottles that had accumulated in the trunk of my car over the past several days.It wasn't quite a bit of money but it was better than nothing.I just had to get them out of my trunk because my mom needs to go grocery shopping this week and I need all the room that I can get in that trunk.
Tomorrow is simply a pick up day.I am hoping that there is no mess to clean up when I do.Tomorrow night is my support group meeting at the church.I am hoping that it goes well.
That was my day today and my hoped for day tomorrow.FJ

Tonight,I am feeling okay.I had a not too exciting of a day today.I simply ran a few important errands for myself today alongside an errand for my mom.I also had to pay my car insurance bill today.I also managed to pay a visit to my auto mechanics garage to inquire about what I had left to pay him.Again,nothing to special.Just a few important things that I had to get out of the way so I can enjoy the rest of the day.
Weatherwise,it was a pretty nice day today.It was not too hot but the sun was shing and it was great to get out and enjoy the day and get some important stuff done.Today was a day off and I really did not have too much to do,which is the usual case.But I did manage to get a few things done and I got to get out.Not too shabby.
Last night,I did go out for a couple of drinks.I even had a few laughs with a few guys and we even reminiced about the good old days on how the city that we lived in used to be.We talked about all the businesses that came and went.It was great that so many people remember how it all used to be.It seems like only yesterday that the city I lived in was booming with lots of business and that there was always some place to go.Nowadays,the city has changed.There is hardly any place to go out and the city is just about dead.But again,it was great to get out last night and I had a ball talking about old times.
Tomorrow is a work day.I am hoping that the day goes by smoothly.
That was my day today,my night last night and my hopes for tomorrow.FJ

Tonight,I am feeling okay.I had a pretty good day today.Though it rained for much of the day,I managed to get a few things done for myself.I stopped at a music store in my area and picked up the latest KISS DVD set.It is Volume 2 of KISS concert footage.I watched soem of it tonight after I got home and it is an awesone set.I enjoyed what I saw on this set even though I did watch only a few samples.But still,I enjoyed it.It was great to finally have it.I am now eagerly awaiting the next one.
Today,it rained for most of the day.I did not let the rain stop me from enjoying the day.I went to a shopping mall to have a slice of pizza to tie me over until dinner.I just had to have some food in my system because I feel a bit hungry and I also did not want to eat too much because it was too close to dinner time.It was great to get out and have at least a little bit of fun.After dinner,I simply relaxed a bit and watched some of the DVD set that I bought.
Right now,the weather is now cooled down.The rain really cooled the atmosphere and it now very comfortable.For the rest of the evening,I am not sure what I will do.I might go out and have a drink before turning in for the night.I do not know.But if I do,I will not drink anything alcoholic because I do have to take my medication later.
Tomorrow is my day off.I have not made any plans for tomorrow but whatever I do,I hope that it will help me in a positive way.
That was my day today and my hoped for day tomorrow.FJ

Tonight,I am again feeling okay.I had a not too eventful of a day today.I simply ran a few errands today for my mom and myself.I had to pick up a few things for dinner tonight and I also had to turn in some more empty bottles and cans.It was only a few dollars but still,it was better than nothing.It was also good to to clean the trunk out of all these.That way,when I have to take my mom grocery shopping this month,there will be lots of room in the trunk for the groceries.I also had to mail out a couple of things so they would go out on Monday morning.
I am now relaxing.I had a light dinner tonight and I am taking it easy.The weather now is a little bit cooler.It was pretty hot but it was not too humid or hazy.
I am getting ready for tonight.I am going to gout and sing up a storm.I always look forward to entertaining the crowd every Saturday night.I always have a blast entertaining them.I always look forward to singing up a storm every Saturday night.I am hoping that the night goes well.Though I rarely,if ever,have an off night,I always hope for things to go well.You never know what might happen.Again,I hope that the night goes well.
Tomorrow is Sunday.I have not really made any plans for tomorrow.I do not know what I will do but whatever I do,I hope that it will help me in a very positive way.
That was my day today and my hoped for night tonight,including my anticipation for tomorrow.FJ

Tonight,I am feeling okay.I had a not too bad of a day today despite a minor negative thing that hapened to me today.A very inconsiderate guy answered the phone over at the social club and would not give me his name as I asked for it.I then asked if I could talk to a staff member and he refused to let me do that.He got really nasty and hung up.I called nearly a minute later and the same guy answered the phone.I got really insistant in talking to a staff member and he finally did.After talking to the staffer,I told the staffer how the guy who answered the phone was very rude,cocky and nasty with me over the phone.When I arrived there to get my lunch,that guy avoided me and did not speak to me.I guess that the staffer advised him to stay away with me and that he was not allowed to use the phone for the rest of the day,with the latter being a rule there if you use innappropriate language and/or conduct when answering the phone.
The work shift went by pretty well.There was not really an awful lot to do.The shift went by pretty fast.As a result,I simply bagged the little bit that I did and dropped off the clean laundry at the rehab center.Afterwards,I stopped at a supermarket to pick up a few things for dinner.Tonight's dinner was pretty light.I did not eat too much.I did a little bit more personal PC work and relaxed.
I even managed to visit with a friend and his live in girlfriend and they are doing great.I was happy.While I was out,I did a virus scan on my computer and my database was clean.It is great to have a nice clean computer that is virus and spyware free.
Tomorrow night starts the weekend.I am eagerly awaiting tomorrow night because I will be singing up a storm tomorrow night.I am hoping that the night goes by well.Of course,I will be singing amidst depression of losing a friend so suddenly.But I am going to try and move on and hope to be over this soon.
That was my day today and my hoped for day tomorrow.FJ

Tonight,I am feeling okay.I had a day that was not too exciting.I did not do too much except my usual going to work this morning and going home.The work shift went by smoothly but I was still feeling the ill effects of losing a friend all so suddenly.I still find it hard to believe that he is gone.One minute he was there.The next minute he is gone.I don't know why that had to happen to him so suddenly and so young.He was still a very young man.I even shared how I felt with someone over at the social club.It was a shocker to have found out that he was dead.It is going to be tough to try and get along without him for quite some time.Again,I am still feeling the effects of this loss.It is pretty HUGE.I do not know how long it will take for me to get over this but I am going to have to do that.I can not dwell on this loss forever.I know that if I don't want to do that,I am going to need some advice on how to do that.This is the fourth consecutive death to happen where someone I knew died too fast.Again,he was at the meeting last Wednesday and now he is no longer here on earth.
When I did get home,I did some of my personal computer work and saved some for later.I only finished it because my grand nieces and grand nephew were here for much of the late afternoon.I simply went upstairs and laid down for much of the late afternoon because I did not want to be bothered by all the noise that they were making.I know that kids will make noise but I needed some quiet time for myself.So,I stayed upstairs in my room and laid down.They did leave soon when the evening was starting and I had a nice quiet dinner.I am now relaxing and getting ready for the next day,which is another work day.I am hoping that the shift goes by smoothly.I am still going to need some moral support in hopes to recover from this all too soon and sudden loss.I am still going to go to the meetings every Wednesday and I am still going to continue and try to get a lot out of them.I hope that this will be the best possible way to help me get over this sudden tragedy.
That was my day today and my hoped for day tomorrow.FJ

Tonight,I am feeling mixed emotions.The reason why I am feeling this way is because of what I had just found out tonight while at the meeting.
First off,the laundry pick-up went great.There was no mess to clean up anywhere and I dropped it off and sorted it out at the work site.Afterwards,I picked up something for dinner for myself and relaxed for much of the afternoon.I did do my personal PC work today and even that was great.The day,though it was a little HAZY & HUMID,it was actually not as that as it had been the past several days.It was great to have even minimal relief from all of that.
My appointment with my sexual abuse support counselor went great as well.We talked for almost an hour.This was my last meeting with her prior to her leaving for maternity reasons.She will be assigning me a temporary replacement counselor until she returns in January.I am going to miss her and I did wish her well on her pregnancy and that her conception goes well.
Tonight,while the meeting was wonderful.There was a certain sadness within the group tonight.Apparently,one of the members of the support group had passed away.He was killed in an auto accident.A car hit his motorcycle and he was thrown pretty severely off of his cycle and he hit the ground really hard.According to reports,he died on the way to the hospital.I had heard this on Sunday evening when watching the news.I did not know that it was one of the support group members until I got to the meeting tonight.I arrived there with joy and a lot of enthusiasm over the past few days only to be hit really hard by this tragedy.What was surprising about this was that he was at the meeting last Wednesday evening and he was full of life but now,he's gone.It is hard to believe that he is gone.One minute he was there.The next minute,he's gone.I am now wondering WHY HIM?!He was still a very young man.He was working on a reconciliation with his family when this tragedy happened.Why did it have to heappen?I am going to miss him.He wil be missed by everybody in the group and with the people that he worshipped with.
That is why I am feeling mixed emotions tonight.I was feeling joy and enthusiastic about being at the meeting because I wanted to share what went on with me over the last few days.I am also feeling sadness because a member of my support group at the church is now dead.This death was the most shocking thing to happen this week.It is also the fourth consecutive death where someone very close to me died so suddenly.One minute the people are there.The next minute they are gone.
Tomorrow is another work day.I am hoping that the shift goes by smoothly.I am hoping that the next two days go by smoothly.After the shocking and sad news that I received tonight,the next couple of days I am hoping for to go better.
That was my day today and my hopes for the next two days.FJ

Tonight,I am feeling okay.I had a pretty smooth work day today.There was no mess to clean but I did not pick up too much as far as dirty laundry.Apparently,some of the client's have not bothered to change their stuff as of yet.But I am hoping that in the next few days,there will be some to pick up.While the day went by smoothly,the day was nothing to smile about.It was HAZY,HOT,MUGGY & HUMID.The heat and humidity wore me out as I was driving home.Plus,I had to do a detour due to road reapairs on an expressway that I was driving on to make up for lost time.Fortunately,I managed to get everything that I had to do done.I also managed to finally pay my bank for a line of credit account that I have with them.Afterwards,I took it easy for much of the day and had a light dinner.
I did have minor computer issues today.I tried to connect to the internet twice but had to restart my computer both times before I finally managed to log on.I got my personal PC work done and that was it.
I also ran a personal errand for myself to get a couple of things that I personally needed.When I got home,I bathed and watched a little bit of TV.It was great to clean up and get rid of all that sweat and odor of the day.I I hear that tomorrow is supposed to be a repeat of today.We did have a little bit of rain but it did little to cool the atmosphere.Oh Well!
Tomorrow is simply a pick up day.I also have an appointment with my sexual abuse support counselor tomorrow afternoon and I also have my usual Wednesday night support group meeting at the church.I just that all goes well for me tomorrow.
That was my day today and my hoped for day tomorrow.FJ

Tonight,I am feeling pretty good.I had a very good day today.I had my first session with the counselor and the session went great.We talked for a little over two hours today in her office and it was great to finally get a lot of what I had to get off of my chest regarding what led me to having SSA and how I can go about resolving the issues.Though I did have to pay some money for the session,it was worth the money that I had paid.She also informed me that she is going to get ahold of some other group in another area to see when their next meeting will be.She said that it would be great for me to get involved with this group and share some of the same stuff that I had shared with her.Again,it was a wonderful session.I am looking forward to another session with her next month when I have some money within the next month.I had a great time talking with her.I am looking forward to talking with her again.She also informed me that she will have another lady call me who also was once in the lifestyle herself and I will be talking with her until she finds a man for me to talk to about the same issues.I am hoping that my first conversation with that lady goes over well.Again,I will talk with her until a man has been found who can talk with me about this.
After the meeting,I stopped at a Salvation Army Thrift Shop in the area and I found a couple more hard to find records there.I also found a few old tapes.It took me over an hour to get back home but the drive was well worth it.It will be great to get involved with another group.I am hoping that the other group also works out well when I meet with them.
Last night,I did go out and have a quick drink at the cafe with a few of the patrons.It was wonderful to be there and talk with them.I am looking forward to Saturday night so I can entertain them yet again.
Tomorrow is a work day I am hoping that the day goes by smoothly.After the great weekend,a smooth work day would be the right way to start.
That was my day today and my hoped for day tomorrow.FJ

Tonight,I am feeling okay.I had another not too exciting of a day today.I simply ran another errand for my mom today.It was to get a few things for the home today.It was nothing really too special.It was just to get some coffee and some donuts over at Dunkin Donuts.Before that,I paid a visit with a friend of mine to see if they had gotten the stuff that I had left them.They said that they did.But while there,I got a rude awakening.They asked me to loan them $5.00 because he was in need of his diabetic medication.I loaned them the money though I really did not want to.But I know that they will pay me the money back when they can.They also know of my policy regarding money being loaned out.They know that I will not loan them any more money until they pay me what they owe me back.I have to simply withdraw some money out of my account for lunch tomorrow.Don't get me wrong,I have no problem with them borrowing money from me and they have no problem with my policy regarding when I do this.But when I am asked to do that with money that I was holding for another reason,this really makes me feel very angry and even uncomfortable.But again,I know that I will get the money back from them when they have it.They simply told me to come back in a few days to get it back.
Last night,my night of entertaining the crowd went great.It was yet another successful night for me.I was well received as always and the crowd liked my song selections.There was a little criticism from a female patron over a couple of selections that I had made,she did like my final song,which was The Gambler by Kenny Rogers.Still,despite that criticism,it was a successful night.I had a blast and it made me feel good to entertain them as much as they enjoyed me doing it for them.That is my sole motivator.I look forward to next Saturday night even more now and every Saturday night even more.
Tomorrow is my day off.I will be seeing a counselor tomorrow afternoon that I had learned about via Exodus International.I am hoping that the first session goes over well.I am looking forward to telling the counselor my story as to what led me to have SSA and other stuff that had happened over my life.Again,I am hoping that the session goes well.
For the rest of the night,I have really no plans.But I just might stay home and take it easy or maybe go out for a quick drink before turning in.
That was my day today and my hoped for day tomorrow.FJ

Tonight,I am feeling pretty good,hopeful and optimistic.I had a not too exciting of a day today.I simply ran a couple of errands for my mom and I dropped something off at a friend's house.I also managed to have a light sandwich at a restaurant to tie me over until dinner.The best thing about today is that the sun was shining but the heat and humidity of the past several days was not happening.It was pretty cool.The sun also was not that hot either.It was a nice day.The errands were only small things that I had to do because we needed a few things for the home.Again,it was not too bad of a day and I got a lot accomplished.
Right now,I am at home relaxing.I just had a light dinner and I am feeling good.I am getting ready for tonight.I am going to be singing up a storm tonight.I do not know what I will do but I know that it will be special.I am hoping that the night goes well for me.Though I rarely,if ever,have an off night,I still always hope for everything to go well.You never know what might happen.I am thinking of trying something a little different with my singing tonight.I don't know what that something will be.But I hope that it works out for the better and the night is a success.
Tomorrow is Sunday.I have not made any plans but I hope that whatever I do,I hope that it is something that will benefit me.On Monday,I will be seeing a new counselor.I am hoping that the initial counseling session goes good.
That was my day today and my hoped for night tonight.Also,my hopes for tomorrow and the day after that.FJ

Tonight,I am feeling a little bit better than yesterday.Today,I managed to get much of my computer work done with no problems.That was great.I did manage to get a lot done this morning before going to work this afternoon.I still have to do a little bit more before calling it a day.
Earlier tonight,I had a talk with an old friend that I had not talked to in a long time.It was great to talk to him.I talked with him for almost a whole 90 minutes.It was a great conversation that I had with him.We even made plans to get together in the near future.It would be truly neat to get together with him.We did talk about a lot of things.It would be neat to talk with face to face once again.
The work shift today went by smoothly.There was not a mess at the pick up site.The day went by well.For most of the day,the weather was HAZY,HOT & HUMID but it got stormy in the late afternoon.The sky started getting dark as I was driving home.I had to stop at the post office to mail out a couple of important checks to a couple of creditors.On the way home,it started out with light rain then it hailed when I was in the area where I live.I had to stop at Blockbuster to pick up another movie and I went to cash my paycheck.When I was at the bank,it was a torrential downpour that turned back into hail and back to torrential rain and thunder.I managed to make it home but I had to go back out to withdrawl some more money at the bank.When I arrived back home,I stayed home for a while to wait for the storm to end.When it did,I went out to get something to eat.
I am now at home relaxing.It is now a pretty cool evening.The storm did manage to help cool things down.I hope that this continues for a while.
Tomorrow night is my night to sing for the crowd.I am hoping the night goes well.It always makes me better appreciate when the weekend arrives.I always look forward to entertaining the crowd and it is the best thing about the weekend for me.
That was my day today and my hoped for night tomorrow night.FJ

Tonight,I am feeling mixed emotions.The main contributor why I am feeling this way because I had computer issues for most of the day.I was trying to do my personal e-mail work but had some problems.While I was trying to advance into the next message in my inbox,I,every few seconds,got a "That Page Can Not Be Displayed" message and even after refreshing and getting it back,I got the same thing a few seconds later.Not only that,I also was replying to an Ebay message and when I signed out,I got 34 windows popping up.I do not know how that happened nor why it happened.But I managed to get rid of them all and I restarted my computer.To be on the safe side,I did a complete virus scan to see if there was anything in my computer data base that was not supposed to be there.Fortunately,my computer was clean of any threats such as viruses and spyware but I also restarted it again after not being able to connect to the internet.The best thing was that I managed to finish my personal e-mail work without any more problems.
The work shift today went by smoothly.But I was still tired due to the heat and humidity.It was even more HAZY,HOT & HUMID that it was yesterday.The temps went up to 93 degrees.The heat and humidity on the drive home made me tired.I also had to stop and pick something up on the way home.As a result of my tiredness when I got home,I layed down for much of the afternoon.It was kind of boring but it was HOT outside.I did not want to go anywhere nor did I feel like going anywhere.
I even managed to turn in some bottles and cans that had accumiliated in my trunk over the past several days.I was glad to get them out because there was a lot in there and I wanted to have more room for important things.It was a pretty good sum of money.
Tomorrow is another work day.I am hoping that the shift goes well.After that,it's the weekend.I will be doing my usual singing for the crowd on Saturday night.I am hoping that the night goes well.
That was my day today and my hoped for day tomorrow.FJ

Tonight,I am feeling pretty good.I had a very smooth pick-up day today.There was no big messes to clean,which made me feel better.I was afraid that there would be a big mess.But there was none.I am glad.For the rest of the afternoon,I stayed home and relaxed.There was nothing to do anyway.I relaxed and watched a little bit more of the DVD's that I bought.
It was a HAZY,HOT & HUMID day today.I was really sweating up pretty much as I was driving home after dropping off the laundry.Before I went home,I picked up something for the home and I relaxed for most of the afternoon.It was also very quiet today.I rarely ever have a quiet afternoon anymore.So,I savored this for a while.I enjoyed it pretty much.
Tonight,the group meeting at the church went great.We had a new guy join us for tonight's meeting.It was once again great to hear all the men tell their stories and have the opportunity to share mine.It was wonderful.It was great to relieve myself of a lot more excess emotional baggage.I am looking forward to the next meeting.
I had just gotten a phone call from a counselor in Williamsville.I have an appointment with her on Monday at 3:00p.m.I am looking forward to meeting with her.I hope that the meeting goes well.
Tomorrow is a work day.I am hoping that the shift goes by well.
That was my day today and my hoped for day tomorrow.FJ

Tonight,I am feeling okay.I had a pretty smooth work day.The only thing was that it was unexpectedly cut in half today due to some of the work staff going to a special meeting this afternoon.I simply bagged what I had done and I dropped it off at the rehabilitation center and headed for home.
I was still a little tired.The shift went by smoothly but the heat and humidity on the way home was what tired me out.I simply laid down and watched some of the new DVD's that I bought yesterday.It was great to relax a bit after the day's work even though it was cut short.But still,I am still going to be paid a full work day because nobody told me that this was.
After I relaxed for a while,I went out to run an errand for mom.I had to withdrawl some money from her account on her behalf.After I got home,I ate and waited for the weather to cool down before finishing the day's errand.After that,I came home and bathed.I now feel a bit better.
Tomorrow is simply a pick-up day.I hope that there is no mess to clean.I have the rest of the afternoon off.Tomorrow night is another support group meeting at the church.I hope that the meeting goes well.
That was my day today and my hoped for day tomorrow.FJ

Tonight,I am feeling okay.I had a not too eventful of a day today.I simply went out for some air earlier today around the town.I did manage to stop in a Dollar General store in the downtown area of the city that I live in and I picked up a three DVD set of Davey & Goliath cartoons that were in a bargain box.They were simply 2 for $6.00.There were three in there so I bought all three of them.I remember Davey & Goliath from when I was a little boy.I used to watch this on TV almost every morning before I went to school.In my area,this came on every other day in two parts and they would show it in it's entirety on Sunday.I was thrilled to add another piece of my childhood back into my life once again.I am also happy to have these in my ever growing DVD library.I can share them one day with my eldest grand niec when it is only her and not the other two.Again,it's great to have another piece of my childhood back into my life.
My grand nieces and my grand nephew were here for most of the afternoon.They were here for only a few hours.I simply did my computer work and stayed upstairs for much of the time until they left.I have nothing personal against them.I just needed some peace and quiet to myself.I was hoping for that this afternoon until this spur of the moment things came up.After my niece picked them up,my mom and I ate.While I was upstairs and later while I was eating,I did a scan on my computer to see if there was something in my data base but there was nothing.Thanks goodness that it was all clean.I only did this because there was an issue with my computer today.The screen simply froze and I had to unplug the computer and turn it back on again.I also had to restart it a few times to get it going right because I had a hard time connecting to the internet for a short time afterwards.Right now,my computer is working good and I am glad and relieved.
Tomorrow is a work day for me.I hope that the day goes by smoothly.
That was my day today and my hoped for day tomorrow.FJ

Tonight,I am feeling pretty good.I had a pretty good day today.I really did not do anything too special.I simply ran an errand for my mom today.I picked up a little something that we needed for dinner tonight.It was a light dinner that we had and it wasn't too special.But it was pretty good and the time was very quiet.
I also had a talk with a friend of mine that lives out of town and he is doing good.I am glad to hear that.I did talk about my two relapses this week and I explained that it was my emotional state of feeling at edge that led to the relapses.He felt that I was going to be okay and I should not worry too much about it.It did make me feel better.It was great to talk to him.
I am now at home relaxing.It is quiet at the moment.The weather has cooled down and I am feeling a bit more at ease.I guess that it is just anticipating the new week and wondering what is in store for the week.I know that I will be working and stuff but I still need to prepare and anticipate what will be and what won't be.Again,I am just getting ready for it to start.
Last night,my night of entertaining the crowd went over well.There was not too many people out but I still had some to entertain.I sang up a storm last night and it was great.The crowd loved it and one lady even thanked me for doing a certain song for her.It made me feel good.I am looking forward to next week.I don't know how it will be.But I am hoping that it goes over well.
Tomorrow is a day off.I have nothing special planned.I really do not know what I will be doing.But I hope that whatever I do,it helps me in a positive way.
That was my day today and my night last night as well as my hopes for the next day.FJ

Tonight,I am feeling a little bit better.I had a pretty good day today.I did not do too much because there was not really an awful lot to do.I simply ran an errand for my mom today.I also paid a visit with a friend for a few minutes.He and his live in girlfriend are doing okay.I only spent a few minutes with them because when I got there,they were on their way out to go somewhere.I left to finish the errand and I went home.
I have had dinner and I am now relaxing.Before I ate,I bathed and shaved because I am going out later tonight.I want to make sure that I am clean and neat.It pays to be neat anyway,especially if you're going to do what I am going to do tonight.I am going to be singing up a storm tonight and I am hoping that the night goes by well.Though I rarely,if ever,have an off night,I always still hope for things to go well.You never know what might happen.But again,I am hoping that the night goes well for me.
As stated above,I am feeling better tonight.After that awful relapse last night,I can now put it behind me.I am still taking life one day at a time and if I can get through one day without a relapse or losing it,Great.There is still tomorrow and the day after that and so on.Again,I am going to take life one day at a time.
Tomorrow is Sunday.I have not made plans for tomorrow.I think that I will just take it easy.I do have to prepare for the coming week ahead.
That was my day today and my hoped for night tonight.FJ

Tonight,I am feeling okay.I had a pretty busy day today.I worked another full Friday today.I did some cleaning around the place this morning and in the afternoon,I did my normal laundry job.While the day went by smoothly,I did have to contend with the scorching heat of summer while I was driving home today.It rained for much of the morning but it was HAZY,HOT & HUMID for the rest of the day.I was glad to get home after cashing my paycheck.
After I rested for a few minutes,I ran an errand for my mom.I had to pick up only a few small things at a local supermarket.When I got home,we ate a light dinner.After that,I concentrated on my personal computer work and did a virus scan.The scan came back positive.There were no viruses or spyware.I feel good now that I know my computer is clean,for now.
The only really bad thing to happen is that I relapsed for the second consecutive time this week.This time,I looked at some disgusting,degrading and disturbing pornographic written stories and I masturbated while reading them.I did feel bad for a while afterwards but after askingthe creator to forgive me for what I did,I felt better.I now have to work extra hard in resisting the temptation to look at something like that again.
I am glad that the weekend is finally here.I will be singing up a storm tomorrow when I go out to entertain.I am hoping that the night goes well.
That was my day today and my hoped for day tomorrow.FJ

Tonight,I am feeling okay.I had a pretty hard day today.The work shift went by smoothly but the heat and humidity on the way home made it feel harder.I drove home after picking up a couple of things at the supermarket for dinner tonight.
When I got home,I was hoping for a nice quiet afternoon.But instead,I came home to an unexpected happening.My grand nieces and grand nephew were over.I really was not in the mood for that.I was tired and a little edgy and technically,I was not in the mood.I stayed in my room upstairs at home while they were there.I tried to take a nap but the noise from them made it difficult if not impossible for me to do that.I was lucky to finish my personal computer work today despite all of that.When I finished,the noise became unbearable that I decided to get out of the house for a while to help relieve me of some of the stress of all that.It did help.I managed to buy a few more record albums at a Salvation Army thrift shopp in my area and it made me forget about what was at home.After paying for them,I headed for home.It did rain while I was driving home but it was not that bad.It was a light rain shower but again,I did forget about what was going on at home and it did make me feel a little bit better.
When I got home,I had a nice quiet dinner with no noise and I took it easy for the rest of the day after that.It was great to finally have at least a little bit of quiet.After the hard work day and coming home to the menagerie there,it was great to finally have it quiet for a little bit.
Tomorrow is my first full work day in quite a while.I will be taking over for a cleaner who will not be working tomorrow morning due to illness.I will be doing my usual laundry in the afternoon afterwards.After that,it will be back to normal for me,schedule wise.I am hoping that the day goes by well.
That was my day today and my hoped for day tomorrow.FJ

Tonight,I am feeling pretty good.I had a mixed bag of a day today.This morning,while trying to stay awake so I could do my Wednesday pick-up,I relapsed.The old sexual images of men crept back into my mind because of my emotional state at that moment,which was on the verge of anger,I masturbated.Yes I did.I gave into temptation by doing just that.I did feel miserable for a awhile afterwards even after I asked the creator in Heaven to forgive me.I was seroiusly depressed afterwards even though I truly believed that I was forgiven for falling.The only really good things to happen was that the pick up went smoothly and my appointment with my sexual abuse support counselor also went great.Still,despite these good things,I still felt depressed over relapsing and it really was a crushing weight on me for most of the day.Before I left the house for my support group meeting at the church,I did take two St.John's Wort capsules to help ease my depression and they gradually worked.I drove to the meeting afterwards.
The meeting actually went great.I shared my relapse with them and they did not judge me nor labeled me with any names or negative labels.It is like that they understood what I was going through and that it was okay.Just arriving there and being there as an active participant sharing what went on today,including my relapse really made me feel better.I feel great now knowing that I am forgiven and I can simply leave that at the side of the road(so to speak)and move on.Again,I am feeling better and that is good.
Tomorrow is another work day.I am hoping that the shift goes by smoothly.
That was my day today and my hoped for day tomorrow.FJ

Tonight,I am feeling pretty good.I had a pretty smooth work day today.The best thing about it is that I did not have to pick up after anybody.It was all bagged and ready.I simply packed them into my car and away I went to the worksite.
When I arrived there,I sorted everything out and started two loads immediately.Afterwards,I went over to the social club next door to socialize a little.They were showing a move entitled Pearl,which was based on the attack on Pearl Harbor by the Japanese in 1941 during WWII.I did not watch the whole movie but parts of it.I still had to concentrate on my job,which I did.After lunch,I went back down into the basement to finish my job.After that,I bagged some clean laundry and dropped it off at the center.I also had to do a couple of things for my mom before coming home.
When I got home,I simply relaxed a bit and I also got a couple of packages that I was expecting to come.The first was a 6 record album of Frank Sinatra songs and a book called the Big Blue Marble atlas,which was inspired by the TV show of the same name that I used to watch when I was a kid.Overall,a pretty good day.
I even had a talk with a friend of mine today and he and his wife are doing great with the exception of a tragedy that had happened in his family.He lost a close nephew of his at a very young age.He was not in an upbeat mood because of this and he really did not want to talk too much.Aside from that,they are both in good health and they are doing good.I am glad about that but at the same time,I was sad that he lost his nephew.I hate ity when people die too young.
Tomorrow is simply a pick-up day.I also have an appointment with my sexual abuse support counselor and I have my weekly support group meeting at the church.I am hoping that both go well.
That was my day today and my hoped for day tomorrow.FJ

Tonight,I am feeling okay.I had a not too eventful day today.After I woke up and ate,I relaxed and took it easy for a while.After the mail came,I went to the laundromat to was some T-shirts of mine that needed to be washed.These were not my undershirts but casual shirts that I wear all the time.I had a pretty good day there.The time went by fast.The only negative thing to happen was that a couple of Black ladies took over the table that I was sitting at.I simply found another table to sit at and simply let the ladies be.There was no need to argue with them.Plus,I wasn't in the mood to argue,anyway.Before arriving at the laundromat,I stopped at a thrift shop and found some more great records and tapes to add to my ever growing collection of each of these.Overall,not to eventful of a day.
The weather today was a mixed bag.It started out with some sun and then got cloudy.There was also a small dripple of rain.Fortunately,I was heading for home when that little bit of rain was falling.I only went straight home just in case that it would storm because it looked like that it might.That so-called storm did not happen but the day is not over yet.It could still happen.
I am at home at the moment.I am relaxing and I am getting ready for the work day tomorrow.I am hoping that the day goes by smoothly.
Last night,I did stop at the place where I sing at and had a nice friendly drink with a couple of guys.I had a good time talking with them.It was also great to simply relax and just be one of the guys with them.I am looking forward to this the next time.
That was my day today,my night last night and my hoped for day tomorrow.FJ

Tonight,I am feeling pretty good.I have a pretty good day today.The weather was nice and sunny.The best of that is there was no humidity.It was a mild sunny day.I took a little drive to another area of New York state today and it was great.I got to talk to a few people and that was a pretty good thing.I even stopped by a park today and took a walk around the place to loosen up some energy.It was great to get out and enjoy the nice weather today.I felt pretty good and the air was right.
Last night,my night of entertaining the crowd went great.I had a blast.There were quite a few people there last night and I even had a couple of guys at a table singing with me the song Heartbreak Hotel by Elvis Presley.It was fun.The audience really enjoyed my selections and that was great.I had a blast entertaining them and that made me feel good.I can hardly wait to do it again next Saturday night and I am hoping that it is as super as it was last night.
I even had a talk with a friend from New Jersey and that was a great conversation.He said that he was doing good and that was great.It makes me feel good to know that a friend is doing good.I am looking forward to talking with him again.
Tomorrow is a day off.I have not made any plans for tomorrow but I do know that whatever I do.I know that it will be something good.
That was my day today and my night last night as well as my hoped for day tomorrow.FJ

Tonight,I am feeling prettyy good.I had a not too eventful day today.I simply ran a few errands for my mom today because I had to pick up a few things for dinner.Before I ran the errands,I stopped in on a friend and his live-in girlfriend to see how they were both doing.They were both doing pretty good.I sat and talked with them for a few minutes and they also had to do some stuff.I left and finished what I had to do.I picked up everything my mom needed and I went home.I had a bath and we ate dinner.
The weather today was mild.The sun was shining but there was no humidity.This was very easy to deal with.It was also a nice break after all the humidity that we have had to deal with for a while.Again,nice weather today and that was great.A nice break from all the humidity.
I am going to be doing my usual entertaining the crowd tonight.I am looking forward to singing up a storm for my friends tonight and that is great.I am hoping that the night goes well.Though I rarely,if ever,have an off night,I still hope for things to go well.You never know what might happen.But I am keeping an upbeat mood and I have a feeling that it will be a great night.
Tomorrow is Sunday.I do not know what I will do tomorrow but I know that whatever I do,I hope that it is something special and fun.
That was my day today and my hoped for night tonight.FJ

Tonight,I am feeling a little bit better.I had a pretty smooth work day today.I was called into work by my supervisor today because the normal morning cleaner person called in sick and they called me to fill in.I agreed and I went into work to do some cleaning around the work place.It wasn't too hard.I actually held down a cleaning job once before and this was pretty much a snap.I did it in about 2 hours.After that,I did my afternoon job,which is the usual laundry.After I dropped off the clean,I went to a Blockbuster in the area and bought a new movie and I also bought three more at a Dollar Tree store that was next door.I also stopped at the bank and cashed my paycheck.Overall,a pretty smooth work day.
I am just glad that the weekend is finally here.It was a pretty mixed bag of emotions for me this week and I am glad that it's over finally.I am looking forward to singing up a storm tomorrow night.I am hoping to try at least one new song tomorrow night.If not,there is always next week.But I am looking forward to tomorrow night as much as I do every Saturday night.I am hoping that the night goes well.
I did a virus scan on my computer and there was a virus on it.It was a Trojan Horse type virus called Trojan.ByteVerify and I had to do the normal routine to remove it from the system.I am hoping that I have succeeded.I have to do another scan tonight to make sure that I have.I am hoping that it's gone.
Other than that,it was a pretty good day today.I am hoping that the weekend goes well enough.
That was my day today and my hoped for day tomorrow.FJ

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Tonight,I am actually feeling better than I was yesterday.I had a pretty good day today.I went to do the laundry pick-up today and it was easy.There was no big mess to clean up and that was wonderful.When i got home,I went back to bed because I still felt tired due to a lack of sleep the night before.When I woke up,I felt refreshed and I went to run an errand for my mom today afterwards.I took it easy for much of the afternoon.
Later this afternoon,my niece called and said that she needed somebody to babysit her children because she had just got called into work to fill in for somebody who had called in sick.It was one of those spur of the moment things.But I did not stay home for too long when they were dropped off.I had a meeting tonight and after I ate a light dinner,I left.
The meeting was wonderful.We had a lot more men in the group tonight.Last week,we did not have too many but tonight,there was quite a bit of men there to get whatever they had to get off of their chests.It was great for me to hear some of what the men had to say and it was also great for me to get relieve myself of some more emotional baggage that had piled up over the past few day,including my relapse.Again,the meeting was wonderful and I got quite a bit out of it tonight.I am definitely looking forward to the next meeting.
Tomorrow is another work day.I am hoping that the shift goes smoothly for me.
That was my day today and my hoped for day tomorrow.FJ

Tonight,I am feeling mixed emotions.I had a pretty smooth work day today.But something happened within me mentally that I do not know.All of a sudden,I started saying angry things to myself this afternoon as I was driving home.I do not know what sparked it and I guess that I will never know.I am hoping that this does not happen for a long time because I do not want to scare anybody away from me nor do I want to make anybody afraid of approaching me.That would really made me feel down if this would happen.I would also feel all alone if it were to happen.I don't want that to happen.I want people to approach me and even want to talk to me.I have not done that in quite a while.All of a sudden,I am starting all over again and I don't know what sparked this again.Again,I don't want people to be afraid of me nor do I want to make people afraid of approaching me.I am not going to dwell on this but I am going to continue to work on this until I can get to the root of the problem.I don't want to do this forever and I want to keep an even balance of my emotions.
What also added to this dilemma is that I masturbated.I felt miserable at first when I gave into this temptation.Not only that,my emotional state also contributed to why I gave in to this.Since I was in a negative emotional state,I was starting to have mental images of men with or without clothes on or even without their pants on and their genitals at full erection.I also had an image of me romancing with another man and performing sexual favors for them,mostly oral sex,which was my addiction before I started abandoning the Gay lifestyle.I have only had frequent occasional flashbacks but this was the first time in a long time that I was inundated with so much that I did not know whether I was coming or going.After giving in,I asked the creator to forgive me and then I forgave myself afterwards.I felt better after doing that and I am feeling a little bit better.But I am going to talk with the creator again tonight before I go to sleep.I still have an awful lot to talk with him tonight.I am just hoping that the rest of the week goes well enough.I don't need any more of what happened to me today emotionally.
Tomorrow is simply a pick up day.It won't be that long.After doing that,I can go home and rest up.I also have a meeting with my support group at the church and I am hoping that the meeting goes well,too.The weather is supposed to be wet tomorrow and there is really not a lot to do when it rains.
That was my day today and my hoped for day tomorrow.FJ

Tonight,I am feeling pretty good.The day was pretty nice and not as humid.It did rain this morning and early this afternoon for starters but the weather was nice throughout the day and that was good.
I did not do too much today.I ran an errand for my mother to get a few things for her today.I also helped a friend clean out his garage and he gave me a whole bunch of empty bottles and cans as a way of saying Thanks for all my help.I turned them in while I was running the errand for my mom and it was quite a bit of money.That was great.I also had to turn them in because I needed to have room to put the laundry bags tomorrow morning when I do the pick-up to start my work day.Not only that,some of the people around my work place would also be bugging me about me having them in my car because of some of the client's past problems with drugs and alcohol.I can sympathize with that.But also,a person working to overcome drugs and alcohol will usually give in because they wanted to give in to their old habit and simply use the empty bottles as a crutch(i.e.excuse)to give into their old habits that they are trying to give up.But again,I do sympathize with their policies and their concerns and I turned them in to avoid any confrontations.
I also managed to stop in a Salvation Army thrift shop in my area and I bought a bunch of 45 r.p.m.records,a few old tapes and some more dress pants and shorts.Again,not too eventful of a day but it was great to get out in the community and just be around other people for a while.I had some fun and I did help someone I knew out.
Tomorrow is a work day.I am hoping that the work day goes by smoothly.
That was my day today and my hoped for day tomorow.FJ

Tonight,I am feeling great.I had a very good day today.It was very eventful.The day was also sunny out and I had a feeling that I was going to have a wonderful day.
Today,me and my mom went to my uncle's 50th anniversary party and it was a great party.My uncle and his wife were glad to see us.I was also glad to see all of my cousins and we talked about lots of things.The main event of this was that my uncle and my aunt renewed their wedding vows with a priest there to make it happen.It was a wonderful experience.After the renewed vows,the priest sat down with some of his relatives and I had some talks with them.The priest was a swell guy with a great sense of humor.His relatives were swell people,too.They also had a slide show reflecting on the 50 years that they were married and even that was something.Each and everybody there marveled at this on how everybody in the family had changed and matured through the course of their lives and how my uncle and his wife's marriage had gotten stronger through those years.There was also a lot of food to go around.I did eat alot,I admit.But I had fun and I did not have to eat anything else throughout the day and that was good.I actually had lunch and dinner at the same place at the same time.It saved my mom from cooking something at home.Again,a wonderful day and lots of stuff to talk about for many years to come.
Last night,my night of singing was also wonderful.There was also quite a few people there like last week.Of course,it was not as much but it was still a great big crowd and that was terrific.I was well received for all the songs that I did and that made me feel even better about what I did.It also motivates me to do it again next Saturday night and the Saturday night after that.There were some guys and their girlfriends there who actually sang alongside me as I sang the Toby Keith song I Love This Bar because I dedicated the song to them.They also like all the other songs that I sang as well and again,that made me feel good.As stated,it motivates me to do it again and again.I love and enjoy what I do and I can hardly wait for next Saturday night.I am hoping that next Saturday night will be great.
Last night did not start off too positively.One of the female bartenders suffered really bad chest pains and could not hardly breathe or even talk.Many of the people who were outside with her were waiting for an ambulance to take her to the local hospital because they were afraid that she was having a heart attack or something.The ambulance arrived to take her to the hospital to have her analyzed to see what was going wrong.Fortunately,it was just the stress of working too much that made her suffer the chest pains and that her heart was okay and nothing else was wrong.The doctor advised her to stay off her feet for a while and rest.He also assured that she would be fine in just several weeks.
Tomorrow is my day off.I don't know what I am going to do but I know it will be fun or vice versa.
That was my day today,my night last night and my hoped for day tomorrow.

Tonight,I am feeling a little bit better.I had a pretty good nights sleep and that made me feel the way I do.I had a not too eventful day.For most of the day,it rained pretty much.It was just a light rain shower that stopped for a minute or two and started again throughout the day.It was just a mixed weather bag that did not seem to let up.
Despite it not being too eventful of a day,I did manage to get a few errands done.I had to get an anniversary card for my uncle and his wife because it is going to be their 50th Wedding Anniversary party tomorrow evening.I am hoping that the party goes well.I will be seeing some cousins of mine whom I have not seen in a long time.Again,I am hoping that the party goes over well.I am hoping to reconnect with some family members who I haven't spoken with in quite a long time.I hope that this will be well worth going to tomorrow.
Tonight,I am looking forward to my usual entertaining the crowd.I am looking forward to this with a lot of enthusiasm and optimism.I am hoping that the night goes well for me.Though I rarely,if ever,have an off night,I always still hope for things to go well.You never know what might happen.Also,a friend and his girlfriend are hoping to meet with me tonight as well.I am hoping that this will be a fun night for me and for them as well.I look forward to doing this every week during the work week and when the night arives,I look forward to doing what I enjoy doing best.It always makes me feel good to make others happy.
That was my day today,my hoped for night tonight and my hoped for day tomorrow.FJ