Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the early to mid morning and I had my usual 2 cups of coffee.After my coffee,I washed my hair over the sink and when I was finished with that,I had my usual quick breakfast.After breakfast,I quickly did my personal PC work and relaxed for much of the day.
In the mid afternoon,I got dressed and I went to a local bargain supermarket to pick up a few things.After that,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I put the stuff that I bought away and I did some more personal PC work.Later on,I started to prepare my evening meal.
After eating,I watched a little TV and I did some more personal PC work.Later on,I started to prepare for my evening retirement.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
My rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I am still in my daily struggles against BPD/Schizophrenia and SSA,which is the most difficult struggle that I have of the two.Today,I was again tempted upon arising to act out on the unnatural sexual desires that I have and it was very intense.I was sitting in a chair when it happened and when it came on,I immediately went to my Heavenly Father in prayer.I asked my Heavenly Father for strength to help me fight and resist in the name of his son Jesus Christ.I prayed hard and I let everything go on my Heavenly Father.I threw the entire temptation on him and asked for the strength to help me fight and resist.I didn't cease praying until the temptation was reduced to zero.I went through the rest of the day with no problems,but I continued to stay on guard and being watchful.I have to keep in mind that Satan and his minions can strike at any time.They will try to get me to break my Heavenly Father's perfect law in regards to sexuality and I have to stay close to my Heavenly Father so that won't happen.I have to continue going to my Heavenly Father in prayer and asking for strength to help me fight and resist any urges that Satan and his minions can throw at me.Nothing makes them happier than someone throwing in the towel and surrendering to anything sinful,including sexual sin,including,but not limited to,the sinful sexual activity between two members of the same gender and also,sexual fantasies and lusting after other people.I have to show them that I worship the true Lord and creator and that his son Jesus Christ is my Lord and savior.Fellow blog followers and readers,please continue to keep me in your prayers and also,please don't forget to leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.I still need both your prayerful and positive verbal support daily and often.Please continue to keep me in your prayers.Please support me verbally by leaving some positive and upbuilding support in the comments section.I will also continue to work on my resolve to make prayer a daily habit.Thanks in advance to all of you for your continued prayerful and positive verbal support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,with the exception of church as usual,I have nothing planned.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes and plans for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I had my usual 2 cups of coffee.After my coffee,I washed my hair over the sink and when I was finished,I had my usual quick breakfast.After breakfast,I did my personal PC work and I relaxed at home for much of the day.
I laid down for a little while as I had a headache by midday.I took something for it and I laid down.I also listened to some soothing music while doing so.When I was feeling better,I got dressed and proceeded to go out.
I went to a local bargain supermarket to pick up something that I needed.After that,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I put what I had bought away and I started to prepare my evening meal.
After eating,I watched a little TV and I also did some more personal PC work.Later on,I started to prepare for my evening retirement.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
My rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I am still in my daily struggles against BPD/Schizophrenia and SSA,which is my most difficult struggle of the two.Today,I was tempted three times to act out on the unnatural desires that I have by fantasizing and lusting after other men and to also manipulate my genitalia to sexual images of men.The first two occurrences happened consecutively as I got up out of bed and sat down in a chair in my living room.On both of these occurrences,I reached out to my Heavenly Father in prayer and I asked for strength to help me fight and resist these overwhelming urges in the name of his son Jesus Christ.I prayed real hard for that strength and I kept up praying until the temptations were reduced to zero.The third occurrence happened at midday when I was laying down resting after taking something for my headache.While laying down,I prayed hard to my Heavenly Father and asked for strength to fight and resist in the name of his son Jesus Christ.I prayed hard and I didn't cease praying until the overwhelming urges were reduced to zero.I continued laying down until the headache was gone and I had no problems.I must say that Satan and his minions are going to be giving me a hard time.Since I threw my obsession with men onto my Heavenly Father and asked him to help me break free from it,alongside helping me to overcome this terrible obsession,they have been trying to tempt me to go against my Heavenly Father by tempting me to fantasize and lust after other men.I have to show them that I am stronger than these unnatural desires that I have.I also have to show them that I worship the true God,the sovereign Lord and creator of all things and that Jesus Christ is the Lord and savior of my life and also,my strength.I can't let Satan and his minions get what they want.They want me to throw in the towel and live my life as an active Homosexual man.They want me to abandon all hope and live my life in sin,debauchery and enslavement to the sinful sexual activity that goes with the territory of the so called "Homosexual/Gay" lifestyle.I can't let them do that to me nor can I let them get their way.I need to draw closer and closer to my Heavenly Father and rely on him more than anything.I realized two days ago that I haven't been relying on my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ in my struggles with SSA.I also realized that not relying on them in my SSA struggles is sinful in and of itself.Again,I need to make it my resolve to rely more on my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ and not on my own imperfect self.I need to continue drawing closer to them and keep up in prayer to them constantly.Fellow blog followers and readers,please continue to keep me in your prayers.I still need your prayerful support.I also would appreciate some positive verbal support in the comments section.I also still need your positive verbal support daily and often.Your support,both prayerful and positive verbal,helps keep me going.It also both reaffirms and reassures me that I am not alone in this particular struggle.Please continue to pray for me.I also would appreciate some positive verbal support in the comments section.Thanks in advance to all of you for your continued prayerful and positive verbal support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for the upcoming weekend,with the exception of church as usual on Sunday morning,I have nothing planned.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes and plans for the upcoming weekend ahead.FJ

Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I had my usual 2 cups of coffee.After my coffee,I showered quickly and when I was finished,I had my usual quick breakfast.After breakfast,I quickly did my personal PC work and later on in the early afternoon,I got dressed to proceed with the rest of the day.
I only had a couple of things on my agenda for today.I first went to the local Big Lots to buy a few needed things.After that,I dropped off some free newspapers at a few people's houses and when I was finished with that,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I put that I bought away and I did some more personal PC work.After that,I headed over to a local church for a free dinner.
The dinner was wonderful.After I had my fill,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I did a little bit more personal PC work.I also laid down and read for a while.Later on,I started to prepare for my evening retirement.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
My rocky road to recovery continues to move forward.I am still in my daily struggles against BPD/Schizophrenia and SSA,which is the most difficult of the two for me.Today,I was tempted to manipulate my genitals and yes,sexual images of men did cloud my mind as well.Today,I went immediately to my Heavenly Father in prayer when these temptations came around.I asked him,in the name of his son Jesus Christ,for strength to help me fight and resist these temptations.I prayed hard and didn't cease praying until the temptations were reduced to zero.When I was finished,I felt better and also,much stronger as I knew and truly believed that I received from my Heavenly Father what I asked for.Though I escaped this with my Heavenly Father's and his son Christ Jesus' help,I still have to stay on guard and be watchful as Satan and his minions can strike when least expected.I have to make it a habit of going to my Heavenly Father in prayer and pray for strength whenever these terrible temptations come around.I have to work on making this my daily resolve.I want to overcome and heal from this terrible SSA.I have to show my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ that I truly mean that.I have to ask for this strength daily and also,I have to make daily prayer a habit even when I am not being tempted.Fellow blog followers and readers,please continue to pray for me that I overcome this terrible SSA.I also would appreciate some positive verbal support in the comments section.I am still working on overcoming the obsession that I have with men and though I will continue to work on making prayer a daily habit of mine,I still need your prayerful support and also,your positive verbal support to help keep me going.Please continue to keep me in your prayers and also,please don't forget to leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.Thanks in advance to y'all for your continue support,both prayerful and positive verbal.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,I haven't got anything planned.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I had my usual 2 cups of coffee.After my coffee,I washed my hair over the sink and when that was done,I had my usual quick breakfast.After breakfast,I quickly did my personal PC work and after that was done,I got dressed to proceed with the rest of the day as I had a few things planned.
Today,I went to a couple of local stores,one a local closeout store and the other a local supermarket.I bought a few things that I needed and I also turned in some empty bottles and cans that were in the back seat.After that,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I put the stuff that I bought away and I started to prepare my evening meal as it was getting near that time.
After eating,I watched another classic TV episode on a DVD set that I have.After that,I did some more personal PC work.As it was getting late,I started to prepare for my evening retirement.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
Tonight,on my road to recovery in regards to my struggles with BPD/Schizophrenia and SSA,I went to my Heavenly Father in prayer and I asked him to forgive me for sinning against him in the name of his son Jesus Christ.I fell into sin two consecutive times today and they were both for fantasizing and lusting after other men and also,for manipulating my genitals to these unhealthy and unwholesome images.I prayed real hard and I left nothing out.However,I also had other things to say to my Heavenly Father aside from asking for forgiveness.I also talked to my Heavenly Father about the obsession that I have with men.This is one of the things that has been holding me back from the real healing that I so desperately need and from overcoming this terrible SSA.I prayed and I prayed to my Heavenly Father asking him to help me break free from this terrible obsession that I have and also,help in overcoming this obsession.I told him that I didn't want to be obsessed forever as I knew that obsession leads to nowhere.Plus,I even said to my Heavenly Father that obsessions can only get an obsessed person into serious trouble.I don't want to get into serious trouble.I want to be whole and also,I want to do what is right in the eyes of my Heavenly Father.I asked for him to forgive me for the obsessing and to help me break free from this terrible obsession.Fellow blog followers and readers,please continue to keep me in your prayers,Please pray that I break from this terrible obsession that I have with men and to also help me in overcoming this obsession.I also would appreciate some positive verbal support in the comments section.I also still need your positive verbal support daily and often,alongside your prayerful support.Please continue to keep me in your prayers and also,please don't forget to leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.Thanks to all of you for your continued support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ.
As for tomorrow,I have nothing planned.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I had my usual 2 cups of coffee.After my coffee,I washed my hair and face over the sink,alongside shaving.After that,I had my usual quick breakfast.After breakfast,I got dressed and I headed over to my appointment with the resident psychiatrist at the rehab center in another area of the county.
The session with the resident psychiatrist went well.After it was over,I left the office and I had a lunch at a nearby Chinese restaurant.After that,I headed over to Best Buy to pay a bill.After that,I did some shopping at a Dollar Tree store within that area of the county.I also did some shopping at a couple more Dollar Tree's when I arrived in my hometown.Last but not least,I did some last minute shopping at the local Super Wal-Mart.After that,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I put the stuff that I bought away and though I had to reduce some of the load in my e-mail box,I did my personal PC work.
After eating,I watched a classic TV episode on a DVD set that I have.After that,I did some more personal PC work.Later on,I started to prepare for my evening retirement.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
Fellow blog followers and readers,please continue to keep me in your prayers and also,please don't forget to leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.At this moment,I can't really talk where I am at in regards to my struggles.I am physically okay,but I am not too okay psychologically.Please continue to keep me in your prayers.I also would appreciate some positive verbal support in the comments section.Yes,I still need your support,both prayerful and positive verbal,daily and often.Thanks in advance to all of you and Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ.
As for tomorrow,I have nothing planned.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I had my usual 2 cups of coffee.After my coffee,I washed my hair and face over the sink,alongside shaving.After that,I had my usual quick breakfast.After breakfast,I quickly did my personal PC work and I got dressed to proceed with the rest of the day as I had a few things on my agenda for today.
I first went to see the nurse practitioner at the local hospital for the last time.We talked for a few minutes and after she gave me a month on my prescription,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I registered a bill that I got in change after having a light lunch at the hospital cafeteria.After that,I headed back out to pick up my turntable where I had it fixed and after that,I headed back home.
On the way home,I stopped at a nearby supermarket to pick up something that I needed.After that,when I came back into my hometown,I stopped at a local bargain supermarket to pick up something else that I needed.After that,I dropped my prescription off at the drug store and I headed straight home.
When I got home,I hooked my turntable back up to my stereo receiver and after that,I did some more personal PC work while listening to some music.When that was done,I started to prepare my evening meal.
After eating,I watched another classic TV episode on a DVD set that I have.I also did some more personal PC work when I was finished doing that.Later on,I started to prepare for my evening retirement.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
My rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I am still in my daily struggles against BPD/Schizophrenia and SSA,which is the most difficult of the two for me.Today,I again gave into the temptation to manipulate my genitals and yes,sexual images of men clouded my mind as I did this and I gave into the temptation to fantasize and lust after other men.Fortunately,I managed to stop myself before it went too far and I immediately went to my Heavenly Father and asked fro forgiveness in the name of his son Jesus Christ.I prayed and prayed without leaving anything out.I begged for my Heavenly Father's mercy and pleaded with him to forgive me.When I was finished,I felt better and also,much relieved knowing that I was truly forgiven.Fellow blog followers and readers,I still need your prayers and also,your positive verbal support.Please continue to keep me in your prayers and also,please leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.I need your prayers.Please pray that I break free from this obsession that I have.I also would appreciate some helpful advice on how I can break free from this obsession that I have with men.I want to break free and I want to heal and also,overcome this terrible SSA.I have to break free from this obsession that I have with men.Obsession leads to nowhere and can only get an obsessed person into serious trouble down the road.I want to break free,but I don't know how.Please pray for me and also,please leave me anything helpful in the comments section that can be a benefit to me.Thanks in advance to all of you for your continued support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,with the exception of meeting with the psychiatrist at the rehab center within another area of the county,I have nothing planned.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes and plans for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a wonderful and eventful day today.
Today,I woke up in the early morning and I had my usual 2 cups of coffee.After my coffee,I showered quickly and when I was finished showering,I had my usual quick breakfast.After breakfast,I got dressed up in a suit quickly and I headed for church for the morning's Holy Bible study class and the worship service afterwards.
Both the class and the worship service were wonderful.After some wonderful fellowship with my fellow worshipers,I headed for home.
On the way home,I stopped at a local Dollar Tree store to pick up a couple of things.After that,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I put the stuff that I bought away and I got out of my suit and into my sweatsuit.I quickly did my personal PC work and I relaxed for much of the day after that was done.Later on,I started to clean up around little by little and even gotten around to sorting some of my vinyl out that I have near my stereo in the living room.I also did my breakfast and lunch dishes and after that,I reheated up some leftovers and that was my evening meal.After that,I watched another classic episode of a TV series that I have on DVD.After that,I did some more personal PC work while listening to some music.Later on,as it was getting late,I started to prepare for my evening retirement.Overall,a wonderful and eventful day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
My rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.Still,I am struggling with BPD/Schizophrenia and SSA,which is the most difficult of the two for me.Today,I was struggling as I gave into temptation again by manipulating my genitals in the mid afternoon to sexual images of men clouding my mind and that led to giving into the temptation to fantasize and lust after other men.Fortunately,I managed to stop before it went too far and feeling ashamed because I gave in.I immediately went to my Heavenly Father in prayer and asked him to forgive me for sinning in the name of his son Jesus Christ.I prayed hard and I left nothing out.I let everything go and I pleaded for him to be merciful and to forgive me for sinning.After I was finished praying,I felt better as I knew and truly believed that I was forgiven.I went through the rest of the day without any problems.Fellow blog followers and readers,I still need both your prayerful and positive verbal support.I want to break free from this obsession that I have and I haven't been able to break free from that.If anyone can give me some helpful advice on how I can break free,please share it.I really need your support right now.Please pray for me that I do break free from this obsession that I have and also,please leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section,especially some helpful advice on how I can break free from this terrible obsession that I have with men.Thanks in advance to y'all for your continued prayerful and positive verbal support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,I have nothing planned.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a very good and busy day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I had my usual 2 cups of coffee.After my coffee,I washed my hair and face over the sink,alongside shaving.After that,I had my usual quick breakfast.After breakfast,I quickly did my personal PC work and I got dressed to proceed with the rest of the day.
I had quite a few things on my agenda for today.I first helped a friend out by helping him donate a whole bunch of stuff to the local Salvation Army thrift store.After that,he had to do some shopping at a local Dollar Tree store that was close to where he lived.After that,I dropped him off and I did some much needed grocery shopping.I went to various stores to get it done and after I was finished,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I started to prepare my evening meal as I was really hungry.It took me a while to prepare,but I enjoyed it after I was finished.
After eating,I watched a classic episode of a TV series that I have on DVD and after that,I did some more personal PC work.Later on,I started to prepare for my evening retirement.Overall,a very good and busy day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
I know that I said that I would share where I am at in my struggles tonight,but again,with all the activity that I did today,I am feeling rather tired and can barely type what I have to type here.Please continue to keep me in your prayers and please leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.I still would appreciate your support as I still need it daily and often.Please continue to pray for me and also,please don't forget to leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.Thanks in advance to all of you and Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ.
As for tomorrow,with the exception of church as usual,I have nothing planned.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes and plans for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I had my usual 2 cups of coffee.After my coffee,I washed my hair over the kitchen sink.After that,I washed my face in the bathroom,alongside shaving.After that,I had my usual quick breakfast.After breakfast,I got dressed real quickly as I had to help out a friend who needed it.
My friend and I were out for a long time.After we were finished,I dropped them off at their place and I headed for home.
On the way home,I stopped at a local Burger King to have a couple of sandwiches.After that,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I did my personal PC work and when that was done,I headed back out to pick up Chinese take-out for dinner.After getting it,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I changed into pajamas and I ate my dinner.After I was finished eating,I did some more personal PC work.Later on,I started to prepare for my evening retirement.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
Fellow blog followers and readers,please continue to pray for me and also,please don't forget to leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.I am feeling really tired tonight and I can barely type.I will share where I am at in regards to my struggles hopefully tomorrow.I still need both your prayerful and positive verbal support daily and often.Please continue to pray for me and also,please don't forget to leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.Thanks in advance to y'all for your continued support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for the weekend,with the exception of helping another friend out tomorrow and church as usual this Sunday,I have nothing planned.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes and plans for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I had my usual 2 cups of coffee.After my coffee,I washed my hair under the shower and when that was done,I washed my face over the bathroom sink and I also shaved.After that,I had my usual quick breakfast.After breakfast,I quickly did my personal PC work and after that was done,I got dressed and went about my day.
I first dropped off my turntable at an electronics repair place to get the speed selector fixed.After that,I had lunch at a Chinese take-out place.After that,I headed for home.
On the way home,when I arrived in my hometown,I had a Blizzard at a local Dairy Queen.After that,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I changed from casual clothes into my sweatsuit.I relaxed for much of the afternoon.I was supposed to work today,but they called and told me that there wasn't enough to do.I also was supposed to go to work tomorrow,but again,I was told that there wasn't enough to do tomorrow as well.After my relaxation,I started to prepare a light evening meal.
After eating,I did some more personal PC work and I also relaxed for a while as I listened to some music.Later on,I started to prepare for my evening retirement.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
Fellow blog followers and readers,I am still having this terrible problem of obsessing.I don't know why I can't get over this obstacle.This is one of the obstacles that has been holding me back from my goals of healing from and overcoming SSA.I want to break free from this problem that I have with obsession.I really do want to break free from this.The main reason is because obsession leads to nowhere and can only get an obsessed person into serious trouble.I don't want to get into serious trouble nor do I want to be enslaved to this obsession.I want to be free.I want to heal.I want to overcome this terrible SSA.This obsession that I have is one of those things that has been holding me back from attaining the healing that I desperately need.It is also one of those things that has been holding me back from overcoming SSA.Fellow blog followers and readers,please continues to keep me in your prayers.I also would appreciate some positive verbal support in the comments section.Please pray that I break free from this terrible obsession.I also would appreciate some positive verbal support expressed in the form of advice in the comments section here on my blog.I really need both your prayerful and positive verbal support daily and often.Please continue to keep me in your prayers.I also would appreciate some positive verbal support in the comments section.Thanks in advance to y'all for your continued prayerful and positive verbal support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,I have nothing planned.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the early to mid morning and I had my usual 2 cups of coffee.After my coffee,I showered quickly and when I was finished,I had my usual quick breakfast.After breakfast,I did half of my personal PC work.I didn't have much time because I had an appointment with the manager over at the rehab center.I got dressed and I headed out to the rehab center.
The session went well.After it was over,I headed for home.
On the way home,I stopped at a local bargain supermarket to pick up a couple of things.After that,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I put the stuff that I bought away and I relaxed while finishing my personal PC work.After that,I fixed myself a light meal of a couple of sandwiches and after that,I watched a classic TV episode from a DVD set that I have.After that was over,I did some more personal PC work.Later on,as it was getting late,I started to prepare for my evening retirement.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
Tonight,I am feeling tired and drowsy from my day.I can barely type as I am making mistakes while I am typing.I will share where I am at in my struggles hopefully tomorrow when I am not so tired.Please continue to keep me in your prayers.I also ask that you leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.Thanks to all of you for your support and Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ.
As for tomorrow,I have nothing planned.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I had my usual 2 cups of coffee.After my coffee,I washed my hair and face over the sink,alongside shaving.After that,I had my usual quick breakfast.After breakfast,I quickly did my personal PC work.After that was done,I relaxed and watched a little TV.After that,I got dressed in casual clothes and I headed out to the drug store to pick up a prescription refill.After that,I went to a local Dollar Tree store to buy several things.After paying for them,I headed to a local supermarket to pick up a couple more things.After that,I got some gas at a nearby gas station and I headed straight home after that.
When I got home,I put the stuff that I bought away and I prepared my evening meal.
After eating,I did some more personal PC work and as it was getting late,I started to prepare for my evening retirement.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
Tonight,I am asking again for prayers and positive verbal support.Tomorrow,I am finally going to make that big step that I have been planning on.This is a step that I have been striving to make in my therapy.This is the step that I am hoping where I can finally let go of the unresolved negative issues,which are anger,resentment and trauma,so I can transcend and finally start to heal.I want to discover the real healing that I so desperately need so I can finally become the man that I am meant to be.I am hoping that it all works out for me in the long run.I am tired of these unresolved negative issues holding me back from discovering the true healing that I so desperately need.I am hoping to finally let goo and transcend and also,start trusting people again as I do have trust issues as well.Fellow blog followers and readers,please continue to keep me in your prayers as I am going through this.I also would appreciate some positive verbal support in the comments section.I still need both your prayerful and positive verbal support daily and often.I need your support to help keep me going.Please continue to keep me in your prayers.I also would appreciate some positive verbal support in the comments section.Thanks in advance to all of you for your continued prayerful and positive verbal support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,with the exception of a session with the rehab center manager,I have nothing planned.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes and plans for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a pretty fair day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I had my usual 2 cups of coffee.After my coffee,I washed my hair and face over the sink,alongside shaving.After that,I had my usual quick breakfast.After breakfast,I quickly did my personal PC work and for much of the day,I stayed home and took it easy.I did go out to shovel the walk for the mail people today and relaxed when I was finished.
Later on in the early afternoon,my caseworker came over and we talked for a few minutes.After she left,I did a little bit more personal PC work.Later on,as it was getting late,I chose to get dressed and go out to a local Burger King for another veggie burger,salad and this time,some chicken nuggets.I even ate my light veggie and chicken dinner there and when I was finished,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I changed into my pajamas and I watched a classic TV episode on a DVD set that I have.I relaxed while watching it.After that was over,I did some more personal PC work.Later on,I started to prepare for my evening retirement.Overall,a pretty fair day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
Fellow blog followers and readers,I am asking that you all please keep me in your prayers as I am still going through a difficult emotional time.I also ask that y'all leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.I still need both your prayerful and positive verbal support daily and often.Please continue to keep me in your prayers and also,please don't forget to leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.Thanks in advance to all of you for your continued support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,I haven't made any plans.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a wonderful and eventful day today.
Today,I woke up in the early morning and I had my usual 2 cups of coffee.After my coffee,I showered quickly and when I was finished,I had my usual quick breakfast.After breakfast,I got dressed up in a suit real quickly and I headed for church for both the morning's Holy Bible study class and the worship service afterwards.
Both the class and the worship service were wonderful.After some wonderful fellowship,I headed for home.
On the way home,I stopped at a local Dollar General store to pick up a few much needed things.After paying for them,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I put the stuff that I bought away and I got out of my suit and into a sweatsuit.I quickly did my personal PC work and after that,I relaxed and watched a classic TV episode on a DVD set that I have.After that,I got dressed in casual clothes and I headed back out to pick up a few more things that I needed at a couple of local stores.After that,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I put the stuff away and I started to prepare my evening meal.
After eating,I watched another classic episode of a TV series that I have on DVD and I did some more personal PC work.Later on,I started to prepare for my evening retirement.Overall,a wonderful and eventful day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
My rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I am still anticipating the big step that I am making in my therapy.As I have been reporting,I am making a big step in my therapy by switching counseling and hoping that it will work out for me.I want to really start feeling the real healing that I need desperately.I need to learn how I can let go of the unresolved negative issues that have been holding me back from discovering the real healing that I desperately need.I am still hoping to finally let go of the unresolved anger,resentment and trauma issues so I can finally experience real healing.I want to let go and transcend from these issues.I also want to finally start trusting other people so I can have real relationships where I can trust and let people in.Little by little,I am learning how to trust others since returning since returning to church over three years ago,but I still need to learn more.I am tired of the rut that I am in and I need to get out.I am hoping that I can finally start to let go and transcend.I am hoping that this big step that I am making in my therapy will work for the better for me and finally,I can get the real healing that I need.I am also hoping that this will help me out more in my goals to heal from and overcome SSA so I can finally become the man that my Heavenly Father meant for and intended me to be.Fellow blog followers and readers,please continue to pray for me.I also would appreciate some positive verbal support in the comments section.I still need both your prayerful and positive verbal support daily and often,especially that I am now going through a new process that I hope can and will change my life.Please pray this works out for me and that it will lead to what I am hoping that it will lead to.Thanks for all your prayers and positive verbal support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,I have nothing planned.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a pretty good and busy day today.
Today,I was awakened by a phone call from my supervisor at my workplace and he said that there was a spot open and if I can come in,great.I phoned him back and told him I would,but I had to clean up and eat first.He said okay and we hung up.After that,I headed over to the sink and I washed my hair and my face,alongside shaving.After that,I had my usual quick breakfast.After breakfast,I got dressed in work clothes and I headed for work.
The work day went by well.After I was finished with everything that I had to do,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I changed from work clothes into casual clothes and I headed back out to the local Super Wal-Mart.I had to pick up a few things that I needed.After that,I went to Subway within the Super Wal-Mart to buy a sandwich for dinner.After that,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I placed my sandwich in the microwave oven and I hit the shower to clean up.After I was finished showering,I ate my sandwich and after that,completed my personal PC work.As the evening was getting late,I started to prepare for my evening retirement.Overall,a pretty good and busy day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
Tonight,since I am feeling extremely tired from my busy work day today,I will not talk about nor share where I am at in regards to my struggles with BPD/Schizophrenia and SSA.I am hoping to start talking about that tomorrow when I am more able and more wide awake.Please continue to keep me in your prayers and also,please don't forget to leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.Thanks for your support and Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ.
As for tomorrow,with the exception of church as usual in the morning,I have nothing planned.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes and plans for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a pretty fair day today.
Today.I woke up in the mid morning and I had my usual 2 cups of coffee.After my coffee,I washed my hair over the sink and when I was finished with that,I had my usual quick breakfast.After breakfast,I went outside to shovel the sidewalk for the mail people and I also shoveled the end of my driveway.After that was done,I quickly did my personal PC work and when that was finished,I went back outside to shovel my driveway and to also shovel the end of the driveway after the city snow plows plowed more snow from the street onto it.After that was done,I went back inside the house to relax for a bit as I was exhausted from all the shoveling,but it was worth it and also,good exercise.
After eating,I decided to relax and watch a few classic TV episodes on DVD.After that,I decided to do some more personal PC work.I stayed home for much of the day due to the weather and since my car was stuck in the driveway until I shoveled it,I had no place to go and also,I wanted to give the city some time to clean the streets by plowing and salting the roads.Still,I kept busy doing what I had to do.Later on,as it was getting late,I decided to prepare for my evening retirement.Overall,a pretty fair day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
Tonight,I have to confess.I sinned today and I felt pretty miserable after it happened.Upon arising,I sat down in a chair and sexual images of men clouded my mind and I gave into the temptation to fantasize and lust after them by manipulating my genitals and I made myself ejaculate while doing so.After cleaning my hands off,I immediately asked my Heavenly Father to forgive me and to be merciful to me in the name of his son Jesus Christ.I prayed hard and I left nothing out.I admitted everything to my Heavenly Father and begged and pleaded for him to be merciful towards me.When I was finished praying,I felt much better and very relieved.I knew and truly believed that I was forgiven.As I am about to make the big step in my life in regards to therapy,I still need to get tough with myself.I can't keep giving into these terrible urges if I want to heal from and overcome SSA.I need to stop giving into these terrible urges.I am hoping that the big step that I am making in therapy will help me get out of this and hopefully,help me break free from these obsessive thoughts and this obsession that I have in regards to men.Fellow blog followers and readers,I need your prayers right now more than ever.I also still need your positive verbal support in the comments section.Please support me as I am still going through a very difficult time.I need to finally start to let go of the unresolved issues that I have that have been holding me back from the real healing that I need to discover and finally feel so I can finally heal from and overcome this terrible SSA.Please continue to pray for me and also,please don't forget to leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.Thanks in advance to y'all for your continued prayerful and positive verbal support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for the weekend,with the exception of church as usual on Sunday,I have nothing else planned.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes and plans for the upcoming weekend ahead.FJ

Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a pretty fair day today.
Today,I woke up in the early morning and I had my usual 2 cups of coffee.After my coffee,I showered quickly and when I was finished showering,I had my usual quick breakfast.After breakfast,I decided to quickly do my personal PC work as I was anticipating attending my appointment today with the manager at the rehab center in another area of the county,but when I saw the roads,I decided to postpone the appointment due to the extreme Winter weather conditions.The roads were way to slick to chance going out there,so I postponed the appointment and it was rescheduled for next Wednesday.After that,I got dressed and just did what I had to get out of the way.I had some personal stuff that I needed to take care of locally,so I spent the whole day out and about getting the important stuff that I needed to get out of the way.It was treacherous driving,so I took my time getting the important things done.I drove as carefully as I could and within a few hours,I got everything that I needed to get done.I also had a light veggie lunch at Burger King when I was finished.After that,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I got out of my clothes and into a sweatsuit.I have been wearing long underwear since the weather started getting colder and I also wear it underneath my flannel pajamas as well for extra warmth.Since this weather won't let up until the weekend,I am simply going to stay home and only drive out locally and/or close to home.If I have no place to go,I will just stay home.I also want to help my hometown out a lot by doing so.That way,they can take their time cleaning the streets by plowing the snow and salting the roads.
I watched a little bit of TV and I also put a DVD into the DVD player.I relaxed and took it easy for a while.
After having a light meal,I relaxed and I watched another DVD that I popped into the DVD player.I relaxed while doing that.I also did some more personal PC work.Later on,I started to prepare for my evening retirement.Overall,a pretty fair day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
Tonight,I have decided to not talk about anything in regards to my struggles with BPD/Schizophrenia and SSA.I will start discussing where I am at with them hopefully by tomorrow.Please continue to pray for me.Please also leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.I would appreciate your support as I still need it daily and often.Thanks to y'all for your support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,I may just stay home as we are,in my hometown,going to get some more heavy snowfall like we did today.I will just relax and take it easy for the day and hopefully,it will all subside this coming weekend as hoped and said by the state weather sources.
That was my day today and my hopes and plans for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a pretty fair day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I had my usual 2 cups of coffee.After my coffee,since I wasn't going anywhere due to the snow and a Wind Chill Advisory in place until tomorrow morning,I washed my hair over the sink and after that,I had my usual quick breakfast.After breakfast,I quickly did my personal PC work and when that was done,I put on a pair of jeans and I headed outside to shovel the walk for the mail people so they could deliver my mail.After that was done,I relaxed and watched a few classic TV episodes and a few cartoons on DVD.After that,I started to prepare my evening meal.
After eating,I watched another classic TV episode on DVD and after that,I did some more personal PC work.Later on,I decided to turn in early as I have to get up in the morning.Overall,a pretty fair day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
Tonight,I am reporting that tomorrow,I will be meeting with a manager over at the rehab center.I will be meeting with him in the early afternoon.I am still hoping that this step that I am making will work out for the better and I can finally start letting go of the unresolved negative issues,such as anger,resentment and trauma issues that I have.I am hoping that I can finally let go and transcend these issues so I can finally discover and embrace the real healing that I so desperately need.I am sick of being in this terrible emotional rut that I am in.I want to heal from and overcome this terrible SSA so I can finally become the man that my Heavenly Father intends and meant for me to be.I want to finally let go of these unresolved negative issues as I know that they have been holding me back from discovering and embracing the real healing that I so desperately need.I am hoping that this big step in my therapy will do just that.Fellow blog followers and readers,please continue to keep me in your prayers and also,please leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.I still need both your prayerful and positive verbal support daily and often,especially since I am making a big step that I am hoping will start putting me on the road to real healing and transcendence.Please continue to keep me in your prayers.I also would appreciate some positive verbal support in the comments section.Thanks in advance to y'all for your continued prayerful and positive verbal support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,I have an appointment with a manager over at the rehab center and on my way there,I will be dropping off my turntable to get the speed selector clean.After that,I have nothing else planned,but I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes and plans for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a pretty good day today,despite some setbacks.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I had my usual 2 cups of coffee.After my coffee,I got dressed real quickly and I headed over to my mechanic's garage to drop my car off to see why my fan for the air conditioning and heating wasn't working and why my windshield washer hoses were not working.After dropping the car off,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I relaxed a few minutes before jumping into the shower to clean up.After my shower,I had my usual quick breakfast.After breakfast,I did my personal PC work and I awaited the phone call from the garage to see what the verdict is.When it did,they informed me that that a fuse was blown for the fan and that there was kink in the windshield washer dispenser mechanism.After paying for the repairs,I took a drive and after that,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I relaxed and did some more personal PC work.Later on,I had a light meal as I got dressed up in dress clothes for the church's annual Epiphany service.
The service was wonderful.We also had a dessert brunch after that.After some wonderful fellowship,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I changed into pajamas and I started to prepare for my evening retirement as I was getting sleepy.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
In regards to my struggles with BPD/Schizophrenia and SSA,I have chosen to not say anything in this regard.I am feeling really tired after all the activity for today.I will start updating all of you tomorrow when I am more able.Please continue to keep me in your prayers and also,please don't forget to leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.I still need both your prayerful and positive verbal support daily and often.It is just that I am too tired and drowsy from all the activity to talk about this.Please continue to pray for me.I also would appreciate some positive verbal support in the comments section.Thanks in advance to y'all for your continued prayerful and positive verbal support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,I have nothing planned.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I washed my hair and face over the sink,alongside shaving.After that,I had my usual quick breakfast.After breakfast,I did my personal PC work and I got dressed to proceed with the rest of the day.
I had a few things on my agenda for today.I first went to my usual hair place to get my hair cut.After that,I went to a local Dollar Tree store to pick up a few more things.After that,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I put the stuff that I bought away and after that,I started to prepare my evening meal.
After eating,I watched another holiday themed cartoon on DVD and after that,I did some more personal PC work.Later on,I started to prepare for my evening retirement.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
My rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.However,I am still in my daily struggles against BPD/Schizophrenia and SSA,which is the most difficult struggle that I have.Today,I am hoping to finally stop obsessing over members of my own gender.I have been fighting this obsession for a long time.I have been seeking advice,mostly by Christian counselors and Christian ministers,about how I can stop this terrible obsession.I don't want to be obsessed with men anymore.I want to think pure,wholesome,healthy and clean thoughts about my fellow men.I want to look at them as brothers in the Lord and not as sexual objects to lust and fantasize over.I have to continually keep in mind that men were never meant to satisfy selfish and lustful desires in the realm of Homosexuality.The sovereign Lord and creator,our Heavenly Father,created man and woman,Adam and Eve,and only approves of healthy Heterosexuality and not Homosexuality.Don't get me wrong,I understand that our Heavenly Father doesn't condemn the Homosexual condition in itself nor does he condemn any man or woman for having the sexual feelings that are connected with the Homosexual condition.The thing that he does condemn is the sexual activity associated with Homosexuality.Our Heavenly Father condemns the sexual activity between two members of the same gender.He doesn't approve of it at all.This is why I need as well as want to stop obsessing over men.I also still have to keep in mind that obsession leads to nowhere and can only get an obsessed person into trouble.I don't want to get into any trouble over this obsession as I want to break free from it and overcome this terrible obsession.Fellow blog followers and readers,please continue to pray for me and also,please leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.I still need both your prayerful and positive verbal support daily and often.I need some helpful advice on how I can break free from this terrible men obsession that I have.If anyone has anything helpful for me,especially if any of you had this same obsession,please share with me what worked for you and I will give it a try.Please continue to pray for me.I also would appreciate some positive verbal support in the comments section.Thanks in advance to y'all for your continued prayerful and positive verbal support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,with the exception of taking my car to the garage to see why my fan for the heater isn't working and I am hoping that it isn't very serious,I have nothing planned.But I hope that whatever O choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes and plans for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a very wonderful and eventful day today.
Today,I woke up in the early morning and I had my usual 2 cups of coffee.After my coffee,I showered quickly and when I was finished,I had my usual quick breakfast.After breakfast,I got dressed and I headed over to church for both the morning's Holy Bible study class and the worship service afterwards.
Both the class and the worship service were wonderful.The worship service today was a little while longer due to some classically trained musicians visiting from out of town and doing some classical music during the worship service.After some wonderful fellowship with my fellow worshipers,I headed for home.
On the way home,I stopped at a local bargain supermarket to pick up some more much needed food items.After that,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I got out of my suit and I put the stuff that I bought away in their proper places and I did my personal PC work.After that was done,I headed back out to another local supermarket to pick up a few more much needed food items.After that,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I relaxed and after relaxing for a while,I headed out to a local Burger King to pick up a veggie burger,a side garden salad and onion rings.I was given a Burger King gift card for the holiday and decided to put it too good use.After that,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I ate my dinner and after I was finished,I watched another holiday themed cartoon on DVD.After that,as it was getting darker,I decided to prepare for my evening retirement.Overall,a very wonderful and eventful day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
This week when Thursday rolls around,I have another appointment with the rehab center and I am hoping my sessions will go well with them.I will be meeting with the manager of the center and I am hoping that it will go well and this step that I am taking will work out for me in the long run.I need to start becoming the man that my Heavenly Father wants me to be and meant to be.I need to start letting of the negative anger,resentment and trauma issues that have been holding me back from discovering the true healing that I desperately need.I don't want to struggle with this terrible SSA forever.I also want to learn to start start trusting others,especially other men,so I can finally have the real healing and affirming relationships that I also need with other men.Fellow blog followers and readers,please continue to keep me in your prayers.I also would appreciate some positive verbal support in the comments section.Thanks in advance to y'all for your continued prayerful and positive verbal support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,I have made no plans.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I had my usual 2 cups of coffee.After my coffee,I washed my hair over the sink and when I was finished with that,I got dressed and I headed for the post office to get a money order to pay my car insurance this coming Monday.After that,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I did my personal PC work and when that was finished,despite being under a "Freezing Rain Advisory" for my home town,I headed back out to do some much needed grocery shopping done.
I first went to a local bargain supermarket to pick up a few things.After that,I headed over to the local Super Wal-Mart to pick up quite a few much needed food items.After paying for those,I headed over to a local Dollar Tree to pick up a few more.After paying for those things,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I put all the stuff that I bought away and I relaxed while watching a holiday themed cartoon.After that,I did some more personal PC work.
After having a bowl of soup and a sandwich for my meal tonight,I watched another holiday themed cartoon as I still have a few that I haven't watched yet.Later on,I started to prepare for my evening retirement.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
Tonight,I am rather tired and I can barely type this.I will share where I am at in regards to my struggles hopefully tomorrow.I am tired and my medication is kicking in.All I ask is that y'all continue to pray for me and also,please leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.I still need both your prayerful and positive verbal support daily and often.I need it every day.Please continue to keep me in your prayers and also,please leave some positive verbal support in the comments section.Thanks in advance to y'all for your continued prayerful and positive verbal support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,with the exception of church as usual in the morning,I have nothing planned.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes and plans for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I had my usual 2 cups of coffee.After my coffee,I showered quickly and after showering,I had my usual quick breakfast.After breakfast,I quickly did my personal PC work and I got dressed to proceed with the rest of the day.
I first went to the bank to withdraw money.After that,I headed over to a local supermarket to pick up a couple of things.After that,I headed to the local Super Wal-Mart to pick up a couple of important things.After that,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I put the stuff that I bought away and I relaxed for a bit.I also did a little bit more personal PC work.
After eating,I decided to do some more personal PC work and I relaxed while enjoying some music.Later on,I started to prepare for my evening retirement.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
My rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I am still in my daily struggles against BPD/Schizophrenia and SSA,which is the most difficult of the two for me.Today,I was miserable as I gave into the temptation to fantasize and lust after other men.I manipulated my genitals to sexual images of men clouding my mind and I wound up ejaculating.I felt so miserable after that and after I washed my hands,I immediately went to my Heavenly Father in prayer.I asked him to forgive me for my sins in the name of his son Jesus Christ.I also begged and pleaded for my Heavenly Father to be merciful to me.I prayed real hard and I left nothing out.I did feel better after praying as I truly believed that I was forgiven.Fellow blog followers and readers,I need some helpful advice on how I can break free from this obsession that I have with members of my own gender.If anyone one of you had this same obsession,I would like to know how you broke free and overcame it.I want to break free from this terrible obsession that I have because I don't want to be obsessed with men anymore and I want to come into favor with my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ.Fellow blog followers and readers,I really need your prayers right now.I also need some positive verbal support in the comments section.I want and need to break free from this terrible obsession that I have as I know that obsession leads to nowhere.Obsession can only get an obsessed person into serious trouble.Please pray for me that I break free from this terrible men obsession.I also would appreciate some positive verbal support in the comments section.Thanks to all of you for your support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for the weekend,with the exception of church as usual,I have nothing planned.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes and plans for the weekend ahead.FJ

Happy New Year,Everybody!
Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a wonderful and eventful day today.
Today,I woke up in the early morning and I had my usual 2 cups of coffee.After my coffee,I washed my hair and face over the sink,alongside shaving.After that,I had my usual quick breakfast.After breakfast,I got dressed in casual clothes and I headed for the local Salvation Army thrift store to take advantage of their 1/2 off New Year's Day sale.I bought a few nice things and after that,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I changed into a suit and I headed for church for New Year's Day service.
The service was wonderful.After some wonderful fellowship,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I got out of my suit and into my sweatsuit.I did my personal PC work quickly hoping that I might get a call from my work because I got a call from them early this morning,but they didn't call.After that,I got dressed again in casual clothes and I headed back to the Salvation Army thrift store and I bought a few more things.After that,I headed for home.
On the way home,I stopped at a local supermarket to pick up a snack.After that,I stopped at work to check up,but so far,nothing has picked up.I then headed over to a local 7-11 and bought a few slices of pizza as a late lunch.After that,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I watched a New Year's themed DVD while eating my late lunch.After that,I did some more personal PC work and I also prepared my evening meal.
After eating a light evening meal,I watched another DVD and I did some more personal PC work.I also enjoyed a little bit of music.Later on,I started to prepare for my evening retirement.Overall,a wonderful and eventful day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
Fellow blog followers and readers,I have had such an eventful day that I can barely type.I am feeling really tired.I can't really talk about where I am at in my struggles with BPD/Schizophrenia and SSA.All I ask is that y'all continue praying for me and please leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.I still need both your prayerful and positive verbal support daily and often.I am always in need of support of both of these kinds because where I live,I feel all alone because I really don't have an awful lot of support here in my hometown.Please continue to pray for me.I also ask that you leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.Your support always means a lot to me.Thanks in advance to y'all for your continued prayerful and positive verbal support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,I have nothing planned.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the early to mid morning and I had my usual 2 cups of coffee.After my coffee,I simply washed my hair and face over the sink,alongside shaving.After that,I had my usual quick breakfast.After breakfast,I quickly did my personal PC work and when that was done,I got dressed to proceed with the rest of the day.
I had only a few things on my agenda for today.I first had lunch with a friend of the family,which was wonderful.After she dropped me off at home,I did some more personal PC work.I also watched a little bit of TV and when that was done,I headed out to a local Subway to get a sandwich for dinner.
When I got home,I ate my sandwich and I got dressed up in dress clothes and I headed for church for the New Year's Eve worship service.
The service was wonderful.After some wonderful fellowship,I headed for home.
On the way home,I stopped at the local Super Wal-Mart to pick up a sandwich for tomorrow's dinner.After that,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I changed into pajamas and I prepared for my evening retirement.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
Fellow blog followers and readers,I will start talking about where I am at in regards to my struggles tomorrow as I am feeling rather tired tonight.All I ask is that you all continue to pray for me and also,please leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.I still need both your prayerful and positive verbal support daily and often.I am still going through a very difficult time emotionally and I am still feeling nervous and also,some joy as a result of the big step that I am making in my therapy.Please continue to pray for me.I also would appreciate some positive verbal support in the comments section.Thanks in advance to all of you supporters for your continued prayerful and positive verbal support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,with the exception of church in the morning and hopefully,a little bit of shopping at the local Salvation Army thrift store,I have nothing else planned.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes and plans for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the early to mid morning and I had my usual 2 cups of coffee.After my coffee,I showered quickly and when I was finished,I had my usual quick breakfast.After breakfast,I quickly did my personal PC work and I got dressed to proceed with the rest of the day as I had a few things planned.
I had a few things on my agenda for today.Today,I had an appointment with my new therapist at the rehab center within another area of the county.When I arrived there in the area,I dropped a couple of dirty record albums over at a used record store and said that I would be back within the hour.After that,I headed for the rehab center for my session with the therapist.
The session went great.I have an appointment to meet with one of the managers next Thursday and I will be meeting with my new therapist in a month.After that,I headed for the used record store to pick up the record albums that I had cleaned and after leaving there,I headed for an AMVETS thrift store within the next county and I bought a couple of vinyl singles.After paying for them,I headed back home.
When I arrived in the county where I live,I stopped at a local supermarket to pick up a bottle of mustard.After paying for that,I headed for a local Dollar Tree to pick up a bottle of steak sauce.After paying for that,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I put the mustard and steak sauce away and I watched a little TV.I also did some more personal PC work.I also prepared my evening meal.
After eating,I popped a holiday themed DVD in the DVD player and I watched it.After it was over,I did some more personal PC work.Later on,I started to prepare for my evening retirement.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
Today,I am feeling pretty good.I am feeling much better than I have ever felt.I am still hoping that this will start to bring some positive changes in my life.I really need to break free from these negative unresolved issues in my life.I am hoping that I can finally let go of these issues and start transcending so I can finally heal and go out to become the man that I am meant to be.Fellow blog followers and readers,please continue to keep me in your prayers.I also would appreciate some positive verbal support in the comments section.I still need both your prayerful and positive verbal support daily and often.Please pray that this big step that I am making in my therapy works out the way that I am hoping it will.I really need to start transcending and progress to the healing that I desperately need.I also want to let go of these negative issues so that they don't have any effect on me anymore.Please continue to keep me in your prayers.I also would appreciate some positive verbal support in the comments section.Thanks in advance to y'all for your continued prayerful and positive verbal support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,I have nothing planned.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I had my usual 2 cups of coffee.After my coffee,I showered quickly and when I was finished,I had my usual quick breakfast.After my breakfast,I started to do my personal PC work and while doing that,a technician for DirecTV came to solve a problem that I was having with my satellite.It took him almost an hour,but he replaced the satellite and also put new wiring for it.It is now working again.After he left,I finished my personal PC work and since I was dressed,I headed out to the local Super Wal-Mart to pick up a gallon of milk.After that,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I put the milk away and I did some more personal PC work.I also watched a little TV and after that,I prepared a can of soup to eat.After eating,I watched another holiday themed DVD and I did a little bit more personal PC work.Later on,I started to prepare for turning in for the evening.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
Tomorrow,I will be starting sessions with my new therapist.I am hoping that everything works out well for me as I am making this giant step.As I have said previously,I am hoping to finally let go of the unresolved anger,resentment,trauma and other issues that have been holding me back from discovering the real healing that I need and also,so I can finally transcend so I can discover and feel the much needed healing that I need so desperately.I want to heal and I want to overcome this terrible SSA,but those negative issues that have been unresolved have been holding me back.I am hoping that this big step that I will be making will finally put me on the right path to healing and freedom from these unresolved issues that I have.I want to be free and I want to heal and again,I am hoping that this big step will work out for me and put me on that path.Fellow blog followers and readers,please continue to pray for me as I am about to make this giant step.I also would appreciate some positive verbal support in the comments section.I really need both your prayerful and positive verbal support daily and often and also,desperately.I am now making a big step and I need all the support that I can get,both prayerful and positive verbal.Please pray for me that this works out for me and also,please don't forget to leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.Thanks in advance to y'all for your continued prayerful and positive verbal support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,with the exception of seeing my new therapist for the first time,I have nothing planned.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes and plans for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a wonderful and eventful day today.
Today,I woke up in the early morning and I had my usual 2 cups of coffee.After my coffee,I showered quickly and when I was finished,I had my usual quick breakfast.After breakfast,I quickly dressed up in a suit and I headed for church as there was a special service today where the children put on a pageant that was themed to the reason for the season.
The service,including the children's pageant,was wonderful.After some wonderful fellowship with my fellow worshipers,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I got out of my suit and into my sweatsuit.I did my personal PC work and later on,I decided to watch another holiday themed DVD.After that was over,I did some more personal PC work.When that was done,I decided to prepare my evening meal.
After eating,I watched another holiday themed DVD and I did a little bit more personal PC work.Later on,as it was getting late,I decided to turn in for the evening.Overall,a wonderful and eventful day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
My rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I am still in my daily struggles against BPD/Schizophrenia and SSA,which is the most difficult of the two for me.Today,though it is,a day after pouring myself out to my Heavenly Father about my problems with obsessions,alongside fantasies and lusting,I had no problems with getting tempted to do any of those sinful things.I felt pretty good all of the day as I had no problems.I am still working on taking this particular struggle to my Heavenly Father daily and not just once in a blue moon.Though I escaped today unscathed,there is still tomorrow and the days after tomorrow.I still have to stay on guard and be watchful as Satan and his minions can strike at any time when least expected.They can try to hit me with temptations and try to use their power to convince me that there is no way out of SSA,when in reality,it's a lie as my Heavenly Father,alongside his son Jesus Christ as his sole mediator,can set people free from anything sinful and slave making.Satan and his minions are liars and Satan is the inventor of lies.Fellow blog followers and readers,please continue to pray for me as I am still going through a very difficult time.I also ask that all of you leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.I still need both your prayerful and positive verbal support daily and often.Please continue to pray for me and also,please don't forget to leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.Thanks in advance to y'all for your continued prayerful and positive verbal support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,I have made no plans.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the early morning and I had my usual 2 cups of coffee.After my coffee,I showered quickly and when I was finished with that,I had my usual quick breakfast.After breakfast,I got dressed and I headed for the bank to withdraw a little bit of much needed money.After that,I got a little bit of gas and after that,I looked around the local Salvation Army thrift store to see what they had and after that,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I changed into a sweatsuit and did my personal PC work.After that was done,I watched a couple more holiday DVDs as I want to watch them all before the Holiday Season ends for this year.After that,I listened to a little music and later on,I started to prepare a can of soup for dinner.After eating that,I watched another holiday themed DVD and did some more personal PC work.Later on,I started to prepare for turning in for the evening.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
My rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I am still in my daily struggles against BPD/Schizophrenia and SSA,which is the most difficult of the two for me.Tonight,I went into prayer to my Heavenly Father as I was really being overwhelmed by temptations and also,by obsession styled thoughts of other men.I prayed real hard almost to the point where I was almost in tears.I asked my Heavenly Father,in the name of his son Jesus Christ,to help me break free and to help me overcome these things.I prayed real hard and left nothing out.I confessed also all the sins that I fell into today and talked about the obsession that I have.I asked him for help in breaking free from this obsession and also to help me fight all of these overwhelming things.I also begged and pleaded for my Heavenly Father to be merciful towards me because of my repeated falls into sin today.When I was finished praying,I felt better and also,I felt,and best of all,I believed that I was truly forgiven for my sins and that the slate was wiped clean.Fellow blog followers and readers,please continue to keep me in your prayers and also,please leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.I truly and desperately need your prayerful and positive verbal support.I still need to be both reaffirmed and reassured that I am not alone in this particular struggle and I need all the prayerful and positive verbal support that I can get.Please continue to pray for me and also,please leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.Thanks in advance to all of you for your continued prayerful and positive verbal support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,with the exception of church as usual in the morning,I have nothing planned.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes and plans for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I had my usual 2 cups of coffee.After my coffee,I showered quickly and when I was finished,I had my usual quick breakfast.After breakfast,I quickly did my personal PC work and I got dressed as I had a few things to do today.
I first dropped off a Christmas card at a friend's place and after that,I went to check up on another friend who I hadn't heard from in quite a while.After spending time with him,I headed for home.
On the way home,I stopped at a nearby pizza place for a late lunch.After that,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I changed into a sweatsuit and I did some more personal PC work.After that,I watched a little TV and when I was finished with that,I started to prepare my evening meal.
After eating,I watched a few more holiday specials on DVD.I still have some that I haven't watched yet and the Holiday Season will be over in a few days and I want to make sure that I watch all of them before it ends.After that,I did some more personal PC work.Later on,I started to prepare for my turning in for the night.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
My rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I am still in my daily struggles against BPD/Schizophrenia and SSA,which is the most difficult of the two for me.Today,I gave into temptation to manipulate my genitals to sexual images of men clouding my mind and yes,I gave into the subsequent temptation to fantasize and lust after these images.I felt really terrible and heart broken at this.Fortunately,I managed to stop myself and I immediately went to my Heavenly Father and asked for forgiveness in the name of his son Jesus Christ.I prayed and also begged for my Heavenly Father to be merciful to me for falling into sin.I prayed hard and I left nothing out as I laid everything down that I did.When I was finished,I felt better as I truly knew and believed that I was forgiven.Admittedly,I feel like a total basket case whenever I give into these terrible temptations constantly,as I feel that I am failing my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ whenever I do fall into sin by giving into these terrible urges that I don't want to give into anymore at all.I really need to start getting tough on myself.I have to start telling myself "NO" when the cravings to indulge in fantasies and lusting come around,alongside the temptation to manipulate my genitals to these images.Again,I am hoping that the big step that I take in regards to my therapy will help make a lot of difference.I am hoping that finally letting go of all the anger,resentment and trauma issues that have been unresolved for a long time will help me.I think that these unresolved issues after being let go so I can transcend and start to really heal and finally overcome this terrible SSA will be a big help.I also need to learn to start trusting others again as I also have trust issues.I want to be able to trust others,especially other members of my own gender,so I can also learn to accept other men as they are,including their intrinsic maleness and to also accept my own intrinsic maleness.Fellow blog followers and readers,please continue to keep me in your prayers and also,please leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.I am still in need of both your prayerful and positive verbal support daily and often.I also need your prayers as I am about to undertake this big step that I will be making in therapy come this coming Tuesday.Please continue to keep me in your prayers and also,please don't forget to leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.Thanks in advance to y'all for your continued prayerful and positive verbal support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for the weekend,with the exception of church as usual on Sunday,I have nothing planned.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes and plans for the weekend ahead.FJ

Merry Christmas,everyone.
Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a wonderful and eventful holiday today.
Today,I woke up in the early morning and I had my usual 2 cups of coffee.After my coffee,I showered quickly and when I was finished,I had my usual quick breakfast.After breakfast,I got dressed up in a suit and headed for church for the morning's Christmas worship service.
The worship service was wonderful.After some wonderful fellowship when the service was over,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I changed into casual clothes and I headed for my niece's house for dinner.
The dinner,though light,at my niece's house was wonderful.After it was all over,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I changed into my pajamas since I wasn't going to go anywhere.I was planning on getting together with a friend today,but they called and canceled saying that one of their family members got hurt in a car accident and their dinner didn't turn out like it should have.I was disappointed,but negative stuff happens.I simply relaxed and watched a few holiday specials on DVD.After that,I had a bowl of soup and a hot pocket and laid down for a bit.Later on,I made plans to turn in for the night.Overall,despite the disappointment,a wonderful and eventful holiday today.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
Fellow blog followers and readers,I am again asking that you continue to keep me in your prayers and also,please leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.I will start sharing where I am in my struggles tomorrow as I was pretty busy celebrating and catching up with other things.Please continue to pray for me and also,please leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.Thanks in advance to y'all for your continued prayerful and positive verbal support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,I haven't got anything planned.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I had my usual 2 cups of coffee.After my coffee,I showered quickly and when I was finished,I had my usual quick breakfast.After my breakfast,I quickly did my personal PC work and I got dressed to proceed with the rest of the day.
I first went to a local gas station to get some gas.After that,I went to a local supermarket to get a spray can of whipped cream.After that,I headed for a local convenience store to pick up a light lunch.After that,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I ate my light lunch while watching a holiday themed DVD.After that,I watched another one and when that was over,I watched some TV.After that,I did some more personal PC work and when that was done,I prepared to heat up a can of soup for a light meal and after I was finished,I got dressed up in dress clothes and I headed for church for the Christmas Eve evening service.
The service was wonderful and after some wonderful fellowship,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I changed into pajamas and I watched a few more holiday themed DVD's before turning in for the night.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done.
Fellow blog followers and readers,please continue to keep me in your prayers and also,please leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.I will start reporting on where I am at in my struggles against BPD/Schizophrenia and SSA after the Christmas holiday period id over with.Please continue to pray for me and also,please leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.Thanks to all of you for your continued support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
Tomorrow,since it will be the Christmas holiday,I will be attending church in the morning and having Christmas dinner with my family first and then,I will be spending time with a few friends.
That was my day today and my plans for the Christmas holiday ahead.FJ

Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a pretty fair day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I had my usual 2 cups of coffee.After my coffee,I showered quickly just to wash my hair and face,alongside shaving.After that,I had my usual quick breakfast.After breakfast,I did my personal PC work.After that was done,I relaxed while watching some holiday themed DVD's.After that,I watched some old TV reruns.Later on,I started to prepare my evening meal.
After eating,I watched a few more holiday themed DVD's and later on,I did some more personal PC work.Later on,I started to prepare for my evening retirement.Overall,a pretty fair day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
My rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.Though it does,I am still in my daily struggles against BPD/Schizophrenia and SSA,which is the most difficult of the two.Today,though it is,I had no problems with temptations.I wasn't tempted to act out in any way,shape or form.Though I escaped today unscathed,there is still tomorrow and the days after tomorrow.I still have to stay on guard and be watchful.Satan and his minions will use everything in their power to tempt me to go against my Heavenly Father's perfect law.They can also strike when least expected.Fellow blog followers and readers,please continue to keep me in your prayers.I also would appreciate some positive verbal support in the comments section as I need this as much as I need your prayerful support.Your support not only helps keep me going,but also reaffirms and reassures me that I am not alone in this particular struggle.Please continue to keep me in your prayers and also,please don't to leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.Thanks in advance to y'all for your continued prayerful and positive verbal support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,with the exception of church in the evening,I have nothing planned.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes and plans for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a pretty fair day today.
Today,I woke up in the early morning and I had my usual 2 cups of coffee.After my coffee,I showered quickly and when I was finished,I had my usual quick breakfast.After breakfast,I quickly did my personal PC work and since I had no place to go and nothing to do,I stayed home and I watched a couple more holiday themed DVD's.After that was done,I did some more personal PC work.After that,I watched a little bit of TV.After that,I did some more personal PC work.
I had a light meal tonight and when I was finished eating,I watched a few more holiday themed DVD's.As the evening was getting later,I started to prepare for my evening retirement.Overall,a pretty fair day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
My rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I am still in my daily struggles against BPD/Schizophrenia and SSA,which is the most difficult of the two for me.Right now,within the next week,I will be starting my new therapy.I will be meeting with a psychiatrist at a rehab center next Tuesday.I am hoping that this new therapy will work out for me.I need to let go of the unresolved anger,resentment and trauma issues that have been holding me back from getting the real healing that I so desperately need.I am a little nervous,though it is a week away.I am hoping that I can finally let go of the unresolved negative issues in my life so I can transcend and start to discover the real healing that I desperately need.I am also hoping that it will stop the constant harassment of sexual images of men clouding my mind when least expected and that the temptations to fantasize and lust after other men will also stop.I have begun to realize that these are the issues that have been holding me back and that is why I get plagued by the repeated sexual images.Due to the unresolved negative issues,I have been held back from the real healing I need to finally start becoming the man that I am meant to be and to finally have my true identity,which is man/male,finally come to the surface.Of course,I also still need to rely on my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ as I can't attain these things without them taking the lead and leading me away from all of this negative stuff.I also need to get the trust issues resolved so I can start trusting people again as that also has been holding me back from feeling the positive feelings that I need to feel in order to feel loved,appreciated and also,trusting of others.I am learning little by little,but I am hoping to get a lot out of life after I let go and transcend.Fellow blog followers and readers,please continue to keep me in your prayers and also,I would appreciate some positive verbal support in the comments section.I still need both your prayerful and positive verbal support daily and often.It's very important to me.Please continue to pray for me and also,please leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.Thanks in advance to all of you for your continued prayerful and positive verbal support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,I have nothing planned.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a wonderful and eventful day today.
Today,I woke up in the early morning and I had my usual 2 cups of coffee.After my coffee,I showered quickly and when I was finished,I had my usual quick breakfast.After breakfast,I got dressed up in a suit real quickly and I headed for church for both the morning's Holy Bible study class and the worship service afterwards.
Both the class and the worship service were wonderful.After some wonderful fellowship where everyone thanked me for the Christmas cards that I sent them,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I got out of my suit and into a sweatsuit and I called my former brother in-law to install a new knob on my toilet.He came here and did the job and after he was finished,he left.I quickly did my personal PC work and after that was finished,I decided to watch a holiday themed DVD and when that was finished,I prepared my evening meal.
After eating,I watched another holiday themed DVD and when that was over,I watched another one.I did some more personal PC work after that.Later on,I started to prepare for my evening retirement.Overall,a wonderful and eventful day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done.
My rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I am still in my daily struggles against BPD/Schizophrenia and SSA,which is the most difficult of the two for me.Today,though it is,I wasn't tempted to act out in any way,shape or form.No sexual images of men clouded my mind and I wasn't tempted to manipulate my private parts in any way.Though I escaped today unscathed,there is still tomorrow and the days after tomorrow.Satan and his minions can strike at any time when least expected and I still have to stay on guard and be watchful for them.Fellow blog followers and readers,please continue to keep me in your prayers and also,please don't forget to leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.I still need both your prayerful and positive verbal support daily and often.I constantly need to be reaffirmed and reassured that I am not alone in this particular struggle.Please continue to pray for me and also,please continue to leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.Thanks in advance to y'all for your continued prayerful and positive verbal support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,I have made no plans.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes for the day ahead.FJ