Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the early morning and I had my usual 2 cups of coffee.After my coffee,I showered quickly and when I was finished with that,I had my usual quick breakfast.After breakfast,I got dressed and I headed for the bank to withdraw a little bit of much needed money.After that,I got a little bit of gas and after that,I looked around the local Salvation Army thrift store to see what they had and after that,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I changed into a sweatsuit and did my personal PC work.After that was done,I watched a couple more holiday DVDs as I want to watch them all before the Holiday Season ends for this year.After that,I listened to a little music and later on,I started to prepare a can of soup for dinner.After eating that,I watched another holiday themed DVD and did some more personal PC work.Later on,I started to prepare for turning in for the evening.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
My rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I am still in my daily struggles against BPD/Schizophrenia and SSA,which is the most difficult of the two for me.Tonight,I went into prayer to my Heavenly Father as I was really being overwhelmed by temptations and also,by obsession styled thoughts of other men.I prayed real hard almost to the point where I was almost in tears.I asked my Heavenly Father,in the name of his son Jesus Christ,to help me break free and to help me overcome these things.I prayed real hard and left nothing out.I confessed also all the sins that I fell into today and talked about the obsession that I have.I asked him for help in breaking free from this obsession and also to help me fight all of these overwhelming things.I also begged and pleaded for my Heavenly Father to be merciful towards me because of my repeated falls into sin today.When I was finished praying,I felt better and also,I felt,and best of all,I believed that I was truly forgiven for my sins and that the slate was wiped clean.Fellow blog followers and readers,please continue to keep me in your prayers and also,please leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.I truly and desperately need your prayerful and positive verbal support.I still need to be both reaffirmed and reassured that I am not alone in this particular struggle and I need all the prayerful and positive verbal support that I can get.Please continue to pray for me and also,please leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.Thanks in advance to all of you for your continued prayerful and positive verbal support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,with the exception of church as usual in the morning,I have nothing planned.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes and plans for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I had my usual 2 cups of coffee.After my coffee,I showered quickly and when I was finished,I had my usual quick breakfast.After breakfast,I quickly did my personal PC work and I got dressed as I had a few things to do today.
I first dropped off a Christmas card at a friend's place and after that,I went to check up on another friend who I hadn't heard from in quite a while.After spending time with him,I headed for home.
On the way home,I stopped at a nearby pizza place for a late lunch.After that,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I changed into a sweatsuit and I did some more personal PC work.After that,I watched a little TV and when I was finished with that,I started to prepare my evening meal.
After eating,I watched a few more holiday specials on DVD.I still have some that I haven't watched yet and the Holiday Season will be over in a few days and I want to make sure that I watch all of them before it ends.After that,I did some more personal PC work.Later on,I started to prepare for my turning in for the night.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
My rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I am still in my daily struggles against BPD/Schizophrenia and SSA,which is the most difficult of the two for me.Today,I gave into temptation to manipulate my genitals to sexual images of men clouding my mind and yes,I gave into the subsequent temptation to fantasize and lust after these images.I felt really terrible and heart broken at this.Fortunately,I managed to stop myself and I immediately went to my Heavenly Father and asked for forgiveness in the name of his son Jesus Christ.I prayed and also begged for my Heavenly Father to be merciful to me for falling into sin.I prayed hard and I left nothing out as I laid everything down that I did.When I was finished,I felt better as I truly knew and believed that I was forgiven.Admittedly,I feel like a total basket case whenever I give into these terrible temptations constantly,as I feel that I am failing my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ whenever I do fall into sin by giving into these terrible urges that I don't want to give into anymore at all.I really need to start getting tough on myself.I have to start telling myself "NO" when the cravings to indulge in fantasies and lusting come around,alongside the temptation to manipulate my genitals to these images.Again,I am hoping that the big step that I take in regards to my therapy will help make a lot of difference.I am hoping that finally letting go of all the anger,resentment and trauma issues that have been unresolved for a long time will help me.I think that these unresolved issues after being let go so I can transcend and start to really heal and finally overcome this terrible SSA will be a big help.I also need to learn to start trusting others again as I also have trust issues.I want to be able to trust others,especially other members of my own gender,so I can also learn to accept other men as they are,including their intrinsic maleness and to also accept my own intrinsic maleness.Fellow blog followers and readers,please continue to keep me in your prayers and also,please leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.I am still in need of both your prayerful and positive verbal support daily and often.I also need your prayers as I am about to undertake this big step that I will be making in therapy come this coming Tuesday.Please continue to keep me in your prayers and also,please don't forget to leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.Thanks in advance to y'all for your continued prayerful and positive verbal support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for the weekend,with the exception of church as usual on Sunday,I have nothing planned.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes and plans for the weekend ahead.FJ

Merry Christmas,everyone.
Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a wonderful and eventful holiday today.
Today,I woke up in the early morning and I had my usual 2 cups of coffee.After my coffee,I showered quickly and when I was finished,I had my usual quick breakfast.After breakfast,I got dressed up in a suit and headed for church for the morning's Christmas worship service.
The worship service was wonderful.After some wonderful fellowship when the service was over,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I changed into casual clothes and I headed for my niece's house for dinner.
The dinner,though light,at my niece's house was wonderful.After it was all over,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I changed into my pajamas since I wasn't going to go anywhere.I was planning on getting together with a friend today,but they called and canceled saying that one of their family members got hurt in a car accident and their dinner didn't turn out like it should have.I was disappointed,but negative stuff happens.I simply relaxed and watched a few holiday specials on DVD.After that,I had a bowl of soup and a hot pocket and laid down for a bit.Later on,I made plans to turn in for the night.Overall,despite the disappointment,a wonderful and eventful holiday today.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
Fellow blog followers and readers,I am again asking that you continue to keep me in your prayers and also,please leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.I will start sharing where I am in my struggles tomorrow as I was pretty busy celebrating and catching up with other things.Please continue to pray for me and also,please leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.Thanks in advance to y'all for your continued prayerful and positive verbal support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,I haven't got anything planned.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I had my usual 2 cups of coffee.After my coffee,I showered quickly and when I was finished,I had my usual quick breakfast.After my breakfast,I quickly did my personal PC work and I got dressed to proceed with the rest of the day.
I first went to a local gas station to get some gas.After that,I went to a local supermarket to get a spray can of whipped cream.After that,I headed for a local convenience store to pick up a light lunch.After that,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I ate my light lunch while watching a holiday themed DVD.After that,I watched another one and when that was over,I watched some TV.After that,I did some more personal PC work and when that was done,I prepared to heat up a can of soup for a light meal and after I was finished,I got dressed up in dress clothes and I headed for church for the Christmas Eve evening service.
The service was wonderful and after some wonderful fellowship,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I changed into pajamas and I watched a few more holiday themed DVD's before turning in for the night.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done.
Fellow blog followers and readers,please continue to keep me in your prayers and also,please leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.I will start reporting on where I am at in my struggles against BPD/Schizophrenia and SSA after the Christmas holiday period id over with.Please continue to pray for me and also,please leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.Thanks to all of you for your continued support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
Tomorrow,since it will be the Christmas holiday,I will be attending church in the morning and having Christmas dinner with my family first and then,I will be spending time with a few friends.
That was my day today and my plans for the Christmas holiday ahead.FJ

Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a pretty fair day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I had my usual 2 cups of coffee.After my coffee,I showered quickly just to wash my hair and face,alongside shaving.After that,I had my usual quick breakfast.After breakfast,I did my personal PC work.After that was done,I relaxed while watching some holiday themed DVD's.After that,I watched some old TV reruns.Later on,I started to prepare my evening meal.
After eating,I watched a few more holiday themed DVD's and later on,I did some more personal PC work.Later on,I started to prepare for my evening retirement.Overall,a pretty fair day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
My rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.Though it does,I am still in my daily struggles against BPD/Schizophrenia and SSA,which is the most difficult of the two.Today,though it is,I had no problems with temptations.I wasn't tempted to act out in any way,shape or form.Though I escaped today unscathed,there is still tomorrow and the days after tomorrow.I still have to stay on guard and be watchful.Satan and his minions will use everything in their power to tempt me to go against my Heavenly Father's perfect law.They can also strike when least expected.Fellow blog followers and readers,please continue to keep me in your prayers.I also would appreciate some positive verbal support in the comments section as I need this as much as I need your prayerful support.Your support not only helps keep me going,but also reaffirms and reassures me that I am not alone in this particular struggle.Please continue to keep me in your prayers and also,please don't to leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.Thanks in advance to y'all for your continued prayerful and positive verbal support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,with the exception of church in the evening,I have nothing planned.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes and plans for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a pretty fair day today.
Today,I woke up in the early morning and I had my usual 2 cups of coffee.After my coffee,I showered quickly and when I was finished,I had my usual quick breakfast.After breakfast,I quickly did my personal PC work and since I had no place to go and nothing to do,I stayed home and I watched a couple more holiday themed DVD's.After that was done,I did some more personal PC work.After that,I watched a little bit of TV.After that,I did some more personal PC work.
I had a light meal tonight and when I was finished eating,I watched a few more holiday themed DVD's.As the evening was getting later,I started to prepare for my evening retirement.Overall,a pretty fair day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
My rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I am still in my daily struggles against BPD/Schizophrenia and SSA,which is the most difficult of the two for me.Right now,within the next week,I will be starting my new therapy.I will be meeting with a psychiatrist at a rehab center next Tuesday.I am hoping that this new therapy will work out for me.I need to let go of the unresolved anger,resentment and trauma issues that have been holding me back from getting the real healing that I so desperately need.I am a little nervous,though it is a week away.I am hoping that I can finally let go of the unresolved negative issues in my life so I can transcend and start to discover the real healing that I desperately need.I am also hoping that it will stop the constant harassment of sexual images of men clouding my mind when least expected and that the temptations to fantasize and lust after other men will also stop.I have begun to realize that these are the issues that have been holding me back and that is why I get plagued by the repeated sexual images.Due to the unresolved negative issues,I have been held back from the real healing I need to finally start becoming the man that I am meant to be and to finally have my true identity,which is man/male,finally come to the surface.Of course,I also still need to rely on my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ as I can't attain these things without them taking the lead and leading me away from all of this negative stuff.I also need to get the trust issues resolved so I can start trusting people again as that also has been holding me back from feeling the positive feelings that I need to feel in order to feel loved,appreciated and also,trusting of others.I am learning little by little,but I am hoping to get a lot out of life after I let go and transcend.Fellow blog followers and readers,please continue to keep me in your prayers and also,I would appreciate some positive verbal support in the comments section.I still need both your prayerful and positive verbal support daily and often.It's very important to me.Please continue to pray for me and also,please leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.Thanks in advance to all of you for your continued prayerful and positive verbal support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,I have nothing planned.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a wonderful and eventful day today.
Today,I woke up in the early morning and I had my usual 2 cups of coffee.After my coffee,I showered quickly and when I was finished,I had my usual quick breakfast.After breakfast,I got dressed up in a suit real quickly and I headed for church for both the morning's Holy Bible study class and the worship service afterwards.
Both the class and the worship service were wonderful.After some wonderful fellowship where everyone thanked me for the Christmas cards that I sent them,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I got out of my suit and into a sweatsuit and I called my former brother in-law to install a new knob on my toilet.He came here and did the job and after he was finished,he left.I quickly did my personal PC work and after that was finished,I decided to watch a holiday themed DVD and when that was finished,I prepared my evening meal.
After eating,I watched another holiday themed DVD and when that was over,I watched another one.I did some more personal PC work after that.Later on,I started to prepare for my evening retirement.Overall,a wonderful and eventful day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done.
My rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I am still in my daily struggles against BPD/Schizophrenia and SSA,which is the most difficult of the two for me.Today,though it is,I wasn't tempted to act out in any way,shape or form.No sexual images of men clouded my mind and I wasn't tempted to manipulate my private parts in any way.Though I escaped today unscathed,there is still tomorrow and the days after tomorrow.Satan and his minions can strike at any time when least expected and I still have to stay on guard and be watchful for them.Fellow blog followers and readers,please continue to keep me in your prayers and also,please don't forget to leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.I still need both your prayerful and positive verbal support daily and often.I constantly need to be reaffirmed and reassured that I am not alone in this particular struggle.Please continue to pray for me and also,please continue to leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.Thanks in advance to y'all for your continued prayerful and positive verbal support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,I have made no plans.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the early morning and I had my usual 2 cups of coffee.After my coffee,I showered quickly and when I was finished,I had my usual quick breakfast.After breakfast,I quickly did my personal PC work and after that was done,I got dressed to proceed with the rest of the day as I had a few things planned.
I had only a few things on my agenda for today.I went to a pot-luck lunch at the place where my weekly groups are held and it was wonderful.After filling up on some homemade chili and some desserts,I headed for home.
On the way home,I stopped at the local K-Mart as I had a gift card that I received from a friend of the family and I used it to make some necessary purchases.After that,I headed to the local Super Wal-Mart to buy a few more necessary things.After that,I went to a local supermarket to get myself a gallon of milk.After that,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I put the stuff that I bought away in their proper places and I did some more personal PC work.Since I was pretty full on the homemade chili that I ate,I didn't eat much of anything in the evening.Later on,I stepped out for a little bit to attend another local Christmas party in town,but I didn't stay very long.After that,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I changed into pajamas and got ready to prepare for my evening retirement.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
Tonight,I am feeling rather tired from all of the activity from today.Regarding my struggles with BPD/Schizophrenia and SSA,I will start talking about where I am at with these by tomorrow.I had so much on my agenda today that I can barely type.The only things that I ask of all you who follow my blog and read my posts regularly that you continue to keep me in your prayers and please leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.I still need both your prayerful and positive verbal support daily and often.Please continue to keep me in your prayers and also,please leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.Thanks to all of you for your continued support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,with the exception of church as usual in the morning,I have nothing planned.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes and plans for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I had my usual 2 cups of coffee.After my coffee,I showered quickly and when I was finished with that,I had my usual quick breakfast.After breakfast,I quickly did my personal PC work and after that,I decided to pop a movie into the DVD player and I watched it.After that was over,I did some more personal PC work.When that was done,I watched a little TV and after that,I heated up a can of soup and that was my dinner.After that,I watched a few more holiday themed DVD's.Later on,as it was getting to the late time,I decided to prepare for my evening retirement.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
My rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.Though it does,my struggles with BPD/Schizophrenia and SSA are still there,with my latter struggles being the most difficult of the two.Tonight,I realized that I haven't been relying more on my Heavenly Father and letting him take the lead in this struggle.I realized this tonight and I also realized that this in itself is a sin.I turned to my Heavenly Father earlier this evening in prayer and I threw everything on him.I turned the struggle over to him and I also repented of not fully relying on him nor having him take the lead in the SSA struggle.I turned it over to him and after I was finished praying,I felt much better and I went on with the rest of the evening.I now need to make it a habit of going to my Heavenly Father in prayer constantly and not just when I need help.I have to daily turn the struggle over to him and rely more on him every day,including letting him take the lead and direct me in the right way.Fellow blog followers and readers,I still need your prayerful support and your positive verbal support.Please leave some positive,uplifting and upbuilding comments in the comments section.Please continue to support me in this particular struggle with your prayers and your positive verbal support.I need your support daily and often.I need it to both reaffirm and reassure me that I am not alone in this struggle.Please continue praying for me.Please also continue to leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.Thanks in advance to y'all for your continued prayerful and positive verbal support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,with the exception of going to a pot-luck lunch at the place where the groups are held,I have made no plans.But I hope that whatever I chose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes and plans for the day ahead.FJ

tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I had my usual 2 cups of coffee.After my coffee,I washed my hair and face over the kitchen sink,alongside shaving and washing my underarms.After that,I had my usual quick breakfast.After my breakfast,I did my personal PC work quickly and after that,I got dressed and headed out to do some stuff,with having lunch at a local kitchen being the very first thing.I had to drop off some free papers and Christmas cards at various houses and I also had to mail out a few more Christmas cards as well.After all of that was done,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I watched a little bit of TV and after that,I went back out to have a free dinner at a local church.After I was done eating,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I changed into pajamas and I watched a Holiday Season themed DVD.After that,I did some more personal PC work.Later on,I started to prepare for my evening retirement.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
My rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I am still in my daily struggles against BPD/Schizophrenia and SSA,which is the most difficult of the two for me.That latter struggle is made even more difficult by my struggles with BPD/Schizophrenia.Today,though I am still feel shame about this,I gave into the temptation to manipulate my genitals and while doing so,I wound up with an orgasm and I masturbated the rest of the way.I really felt terrible and after washing my hands,I asked my Heavenly Father,in the name of his son Jesus Christ,to forgive me and I also pleaded for his mercy.I was really sorry for doing that unclean and impure thing and I was also crying a little when I confessed and asked to be forgiven.When I was finished,I knew and truly believed that I was forgiven and that the slate was wiped clean.Fellow blog followers and readers,please continue to keep me in your prayers and also,please leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.I still need both your prayerful and positive verbal support daily and often.I really need it very much as I really don't have much within where I live to help me out.Please continue to keep me in your prayers and also,please don't forget to leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.Thanks in advance to y'all for your continued prayerful and positive verbal support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,I have nothing planned,so I am just going to stay home and take it easy for a while.I might even watch some holiday themed DVD's while doing so.
That was my day today and my hopes and plans for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the early morning and I had my usual 2 cups of coffee.After my coffee,I washed my hair and face under the kitchen sink faucet,alongside shaving.After that,I had my usual quick breakfast.After breakfast,I got dressed and proceeded with the rest of the day.
I had only two things on my agenda for today.I first went to my morning groups,which went well and after that,I did my personal PC work at one of the computers that was there.After that,I had lunch at a local kitchen and after eating that,I went back to the groups place for a little socialization and after that,we went to a Christmas party at the main offices and it was a wonderful party.I won two decks of cards in a tin and after having some wonderful food,I headed for home.
On the way home,I stopped at a card store to pick up another Christmas card.After that,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I changed into my sweatsuit and I did some more personal PC work.After that was done,I watched some TV and when I was finished with that,I did a little bit more personal PC work.I also watched a holiday themed DVD later on and did some more work on the computer.Later on,I started to prepare for my evening retirement.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
My rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.Though it does,I am still in my daily struggles against BPD/Schizophrenia and SSA,which is the most difficult of the two for me.Today,since I stayed busy,I had no problems with temptations today.No,I didn't.It was great that I had no problems as a result of me keeping busy doing what I had to do.Though I escaped today unscathed,there is still tomorrow and the days after tomorrow.I still have to stay on guard and be watchful as Satan and his minions can strike at any time.They can make anyone who struggles with any type of sexual sin act out in many ways other than seeking out other members of your own gender to act out with.I have to show that I own these desires and that they don't own me.Fellow blog followers and readers,please continue to keep me in your prayers and also,please leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.I still need both your prayerful and positive verbal support daily and often.Please continue to keep me in your prayers.Please leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.Thanks in advance to all of you for your continued prayerful and positive verbal support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,I have nothing planed.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I had my usual 2 cups of coffee.After my coffee,I showered quickly and when I was finished showering,I had my usual quick breakfast.After breakfast,I quickly did my personal PC work and as the day progressed,I got dressed to proceed with the rest of the day.
I had only a few things on my agenda for today.I went to a friend's place to have dinner with them.After that was finished,I went to a local supermarket to pick up something that I needed.After that,I headed over to a local Dollar Tree to pick up a few more things.After that,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I put the stuff that I bought away and I did some more personal PC work.I also watched another holiday themed DVD.Later on,I started to prepare for my evening retirement.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
In regards to my struggles,I am feeling rather tired tonight due to all of the activity for today.I will start tomorrow to about them.Please continue to pray for me and also,please don't forget to leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.Thanks to all of you for your continued support and Thanks to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ.Thanks again.
As for tomorrow,with the exception of a couple of morning groups and an afternoon Christmas party,I have nothing planned.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes and plans for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I had my usual 2 cups of coffee.After my coffee,I showered quickly and when I was finished,I had my usual quick breakfast.After breakfast,I quickly did my personal PC work and I got dressed to proceed with the rest of the day.
I had only a few things on my agenda for today.I first got a little bit of gas at the gas station and after that,I mailed out a few things at the post office.After that,I went to the local Super Wal-Mart to pick up deodorant.After that,I went to a local Dollar Tree store to buy some Christmas cards.After that,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I put the stuff away and I watched a little TV.Later on,I started to prepare my evening meal.
After eating,I watched a holiday themed DVD and I did some more personal PC work.Later on,I started to prepare for my evening retirement.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
My rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.Though it does so,I am still struggling with BPD/Schizophrenia and SSA,which is my most difficult of the two for me.Today,though I wasn't tempted to act out in any way,shape or form,I am still not out of the woods.Today,Satan and his minions really tried everything in their power to get me to go against my Heaven;y Father's perfect law in regards to sexuality by trying to get me to fantasize and lust after other men.Last night,I prayed to my Heavenly Father,in the name of his son Jesus Christ,for a while and I left nothing out when I did.I confessed everything and I pleaded for my Heavenly Father to forgive me and for him to be merciful towards me.I know that Satan and his minions will try and try to get me to go against my Heavenly Father's perfect law with their various ways to tempt me in regards to acting out on SSA.I can't let that happen as I have to show Satan and his minions that with my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ on my side,I have strength within my imperfect weaknesses.I can't let Satan and his minions get what they want with me no way no how.Fellow blog followers and readers,please continue to keep me in your prayers and I also would appreciate some positive verbal support in the comments section.I still need both your prayerful and positive verbal support daily and often.I need both types of your support desperately and again,daily and often.Please continue to keep me in your prayers and also,please don't forget to leave me some positive verbal support.I continuously ask for positive verbal support because I want to be reaffirmed and reassured that I am not alone in this difficult SSA struggle.Thanks in advance to y'all for your your continued prayerful and positive verbal support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,I have nothing planned.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a wonderful and eventful day today.
Today,I wok up in the early morning and I had my usual 2 cups of coffee.After my coffee,I showered quickly and when I was finished,I had my usual quick breakfast.After breakfast,I got dressed up in a suit and I headed for church for both the morning's Holy Bible study class and the worship service afterwards.
Both the class and the worship service were wonderful.After some wonderful fellowship,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I got out of my suit and into my sweatsuit.I did my personal PC work and after that was done,I got dressed in casual clothes and I went to a local supermarket to pick up some cans of soup.After using a gift card from that particular supermarket that I got for signing back up with AAA auto club to pay for them,I headed for home.
On the way home,I stopped at a local 7-11 to buy a small sandwich.After that,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I put the soup away,with the exception of one can that I was going to heat up for dinner.I did some more personal PC work and after that,I heated up the can of soup and spread some mustard on the sandwich that I bought to eat with it.After eating,I watched a movie that I popped into the DVD player.I also did some more personal PC work after that.Later on,I started to prepare for my evening retirement.Overall,a wonderful and eventful day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
Tonight,I decided to go to my Heavenly Father in prayer.I haven't talked with him in quite a while.I prayed to him and I poured out my heart.I told him everything that I needed to tell him.I was also in tears a little bit.When I was finished,I felt a lot better.I also felt that I was heard.I am going to have to start making this a regular routine.I have been neglecting to do so and I have to try to make this a regular thing.Lately,I have been feeling that my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ is distant and I need to start making them close resolving to pray regularly.Fellow blog followers,I am also in need of prayers by all of you.I am also in need of positive verbal support in the comments section.Please pray that I can get through this and also,pray that I start making prayer a part of my daily thing.Please continue to pray for me.Please also leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.Thanks in advance to all of you for your continued support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,I have made no plans.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I had my usual 2 cups of coffee.After my coffee,I showered quickly and when I was finished,I had my usual quick breakfast.After breakfast,I quickly did my personal PC work and later in the afternoon,I got dressed in casual clothes to proceed with the day as I had a few things on my agenda for today.
I first went to a local Subway to buy a meatball sub and after that,I bought a few pizza slices at a local pizza place.I headed straight home after that.
When I got home,I relaxed and watched a DVD while eating my lunch.After that,I headed back out to help a friend out who needed to get some much needed shopping done.After that was over,I dropped them off and I headed straight home.
When I got home,I changed into a sweatsuit and started to prepare my evening meal.
After eating,I decided to do some much needed catching up on more personal PC work.Later on,I started to prepare for my evening retirement.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
My rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I am still in my daily struggles against BPD/Schizophrenia and SSA,which is the most difficult of the two for me.Tonight,I am going to go into anything in regards to my struggles.I am feeling extremely tired tonight.I will start going into that hopefully by tomorrow.Please continue to pray for me.Please leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.I still need both your prayerful and positive verbal support daily and often.Please continue to keep me in your prayers>Please leave some positive verbal support in the comments section.Thanks to all of you for your continued support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ.
As for tomorrow,with the exception of church as usual,I have no plans.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes and plans for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I had my usual 2 cups of coffee.After my coffee,I showered quickly as I really needed one.After that,I had my usual quick breakfast.After breakfast,I quickly did my personal PC work and after that was finished,I got dressed in casual clothes to proceed with the rest of the day.
I had only a couple of things on my agenda for today.I first went to the local Super Wal-Mart to pick up a few things for dinner.After that,I took a drive out to check up on someone that I knew.After that,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I changed back into my sweatsuit and I watched a little bit of TV.After that,I did a little bit more personal PC work.
After eating,I popped a Holiday season themed DVD into the DVD player and watched it.I also did some more personal PC work after that.Later on,I started to prepare for my evening retirement.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
My rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.Though it is moving forward,I am still in my daily struggles against BPD/Schizophrenia and SSA,which is the most difficult of the two for me.Today,though it is,I can say that since I stayed busy today after being couped up in my house during the Winter Weather Advisory,I didn't have any immoral thought passing through my mind nor was I tempted to act out by fantasies and lusting.However,though that may be good,I have been neglecting to talk to my Heavenly Father about things.I have been so tired as my medication has been kicking in earlier than expected.I have been so sleepy and drowsy that I have been falling asleep in bed and not really paying much attention to my praying relationship with my Heavenly Father.It makes me feel regret and shame as I having been doing that.I need to start making prayer a part of my life and I think that this could be one of the reasons why I have been tripping,stumbling and falling so much in my life.Starting tonight,I am going to have to make daily prayer a habit and not just use it when I get into trouble with temptations or when I ask for forgiveness for falling into sin.Fellow blog followers and readers,I still need both your prayerful and positive verbal support daily and often,even desperately.I would appreciate any advice on how I can start making prayer a part of my life as I now realize that this has been contributing to why I have been in misery as well.Please pray for me.Please continue to leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section,especially any helpful advice that can help me make prayer a part of my everyday life and also,a regular habit.Thanks to all of you for your continued support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ.
As for the weekend,with the exception of helping out a friend tomorrow afternoon and church as usual on Sunday morning,I have nothing planned.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes and plans for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a pretty fair and not too eventful day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I had my usual 2 cups of coffee.After my coffee,I chose to go out and shovel the walk for the mail people.Since my hometown was under a Winter Weather Advisory,I chose to simply stay home and take it easy.I watched a few holiday themed DVDs and I also did my personal PC work.I didn't do any showering or washing my hair as I didn't go anywhere today.
After eating a light meal,I watched a couple more holiday themed DVDs and I also did some more personal PC work.I also started to prepare for my evening retirement.Overall,a pretty fair and not too eventful day.I still managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
My rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I am still in my daily struggles against BPD/Schizophrenia and SSA,which is the most difficult of the two for me.Today,I actually gave into the temptation to manipulate my genitals to sexual images of me that clouded my mind.I gave into the temptation to fantasize and lust after these images and I masturbated when the point of orgasm came.I felt really miserable after this and after washing my hands,I immediately went to my Heavenly Father and asked for forgiveness in the name of his son Jesus Christ.I also begged for my Heavenly Father to be merciful to me because I fell and I also accepted full and total responsibility for my fall.I prayed hard and I left nothing out as I prayed.When I was finished praying,I felt better as I knew and truly believed that I was forgiven.I really need to get tough with myself.I haven't been able to do that because I have had my mind on other things.I need to stop this habitual pattern of tripping,stumbling and falling and after that,going to repentance.I can't keep doing this stuff.I need to really start showing my Heavenly Father that I truly mean it that I want to overcome this terrible SSA and also want to heal from it.Fellow blog followers and readers,please continue to pray for me.I also would appreciate some positive verbal support in the comments section.I still need both your prayerful and positive verbal support daily and often.I also need it now as a result of my terrible fall today.Please continue to pray for me and also,please don't forget to leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.Thanks to all of you for your continues support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ.
As for tomorrow,I haven't got any plans.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a very good and eventful day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I had my usual 2 cups of coffee.After my coffee,I washed my hair over the sink and I held off showering as I had a few things to do because in my hometown,we were going to hit with a lot of snow and I wanted to get everything done before the snow were to hit.My hometown is under a Winter Weather Advisory until early Friday morning.I got dressed and proceeded with the rest of what I had to do.
I first went to a local supermarket to pick up a food item that I needed.After that,I went to the local Super Wal-Mart to pick up a few more groceries.After that,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I showered quickly and finally had my usual quick breakfast after showering.After that,I did my personal PC work and later on in the day,I headed over to my church fellowship hall for an Advent family night dinner that included an informal worship and fellowship service.
The dinner and worship service were both wonderful.I ate a lot of good food and even took some desserts home as well.I headed for home when it was over.
On my way home,with the roads being rough with all the snowfall,I headed for a local Dollar Tree store to pick up some essentials that I needed.After paying for them,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I changed into my pajamas and did some more personal PC work.I also enjoyed some music while doing that.I also started to prepare for my evening retirement.Overall,a very good and eventful day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
As for my struggles with BPD/Schizophrenia and SSA,I will discuss these tomorrow as I am really tired from all the stuff that I did today.Please continue to pray for me and also,please don't forget to leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.Thanks to all of you for your continued support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ.
As for tomorrow,since we will be under a Winter Weather Advisory until early Friday morning,I am thinking of just staying home and relaxing.I also might watch some holiday themed DVD's as well.
That was my day today and my plans for the next day ahead.FJ

Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a very good day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I had my usual 2 cups of coffee.After that,I washed my hair and face over the sink,alongside shaving.After that,I had my usual quick breakfast.After my breakfast,I quickly did my personal PC work and when I was finished with that,I got dressed in my clothes to proceed with the rest of the day.
I had only a few things on my agenda for today.I first went to my new therapist's office at the rehab center,but when I got there,it was a continuation of the orientation that took place the last week,which went well.After that was over and I got an appointment to meet with my new therapist,which will be the day before the last day of the month,I headed over to a nearby pizza place to have a couple of slices for lunch.After that,I headed over to a used music store across the street to pick up a couple of used records.After paying for them,I headed back to my hometown and stopped at a local supermarket on the way to pick up a few things.After that,I headed over to the local Super Wal-Mart to pick up some more groceries that I needed.After paying for them,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I put the groceries that I bought away and I watched a little TV.After that,I did a little bit more personal PC work.When that was done,I prepared a light evening meal.
After eating,I watched a classic TV episode from a DVD set that I have and popped it into the DVD player.I also did some more personal PC work.Later on,I started to prepare for my evening retirement.Overall,a very good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
My rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I am still in my daily struggles against BPD/Schizophrenia and SSA,which is the most difficult of the two for me.Today,though it is,I didn't have any problems nor issues with temptations.I wasn't tempted to watch anything pornographic online nor was I tempted to fantasize and lust.I guess that by staying busy,it took my mind off of the sexual aspects that are connected with the SSA struggle.Though I escaped today unscathed,there is still tomorrow and the days after tomorrow.I still have to stay on guard and be watchful as Satan and his minions can strike at any time with temptations of all sorts.Fellow blog followers and readers,please continue to keep me in your prayers and also,please don't forget to leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.I still need both your prayerful and positive verbal support daily and often.It shows that I am not alone in this particular struggle.Your support also helps keep me going in this struggle.Please continue to keep me in your prayers and also,please don't forget to leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.Thanks in advance to y'all for both your prayerful and positive verbal support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,since the area where I live will be under a Winter Weather Advisory until early Friday morning,I have nothing planned,though there is a scheduled church family fellowship night in the early evening that I am hoping to go to.I really don't know what will be until tomorrow.
That was my day today and my hopes and plans for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a very good day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I had my usual 2 cups of coffee.After my coffee,I showered quickly and when I was finished,I had my usual quick breakfast.After breakfast,I did my personal PC work and I also relaxed for much of the early afternoon.As it was approaching later afternoon,I got dressed up and I headed for a Christmas party that I was invited to.
The party was wonderful.There was a lot of good food to eat and lots of wonderful fellowship.After it was over,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I changed into pajamas and I did some more personal PC work.Later on,as I was getting sleepy,I started to prepare for turning in for the night.Overall,a very good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
My rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.Tonight,I am asking for prayers.Tomorrow,I am starting to take that big step that I have anticipating and hoping will work out for me in the long run.Fellow blog followers and readers,please pray for me as I now about to take this giant step.Please pray that this therapy works out for me in the long run,so I can finally be rid of the unresolved issues that have been holding me back from the real and desperately needed healing that I truly need so I can finally overcome this terrible SSA,and heal from all the negative emotions that have been holding me back for far too long.I also would appreciate some positive verbal support within the comments section.I still need both your prayerful and positive verbal support as I am starting to make this big step in my therapy.I really could use some encouraging words.Please continue to pray for me.I also would still appreciate some positive verbal support in the comments section.Thanks in advance to y'all for your continued prayerful and positive verbal support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,with the exception of the aforementioned therapeutic step that I will be taking with my first session with my new therapist,I have nothing much planned.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes and plans for the day ahead.FJ