Tonight,I am again feeling okay.I had a not too eventful of a day today.I simply ran a few errands today for my mom and myself.I had to pick up a few things for dinner tonight and I also had to turn in some more empty bottles and cans.It was only a few dollars but still,it was better than nothing.It was also good to to clean the trunk out of all these.That way,when I have to take my mom grocery shopping this month,there will be lots of room in the trunk for the groceries.I also had to mail out a couple of things so they would go out on Monday morning.
I am now relaxing.I had a light dinner tonight and I am taking it easy.The weather now is a little bit cooler.It was pretty hot but it was not too humid or hazy.
I am getting ready for tonight.I am going to gout and sing up a storm.I always look forward to entertaining the crowd every Saturday night.I always have a blast entertaining them.I always look forward to singing up a storm every Saturday night.I am hoping that the night goes well.Though I rarely,if ever,have an off night,I always hope for things to go well.You never know what might happen.Again,I hope that the night goes well.
Tomorrow is Sunday.I have not really made any plans for tomorrow.I do not know what I will do but whatever I do,I hope that it will help me in a very positive way.
That was my day today and my hoped for night tonight,including my anticipation for tomorrow.FJ

Tonight,I am feeling okay.I had a not too bad of a day today despite a minor negative thing that hapened to me today.A very inconsiderate guy answered the phone over at the social club and would not give me his name as I asked for it.I then asked if I could talk to a staff member and he refused to let me do that.He got really nasty and hung up.I called nearly a minute later and the same guy answered the phone.I got really insistant in talking to a staff member and he finally did.After talking to the staffer,I told the staffer how the guy who answered the phone was very rude,cocky and nasty with me over the phone.When I arrived there to get my lunch,that guy avoided me and did not speak to me.I guess that the staffer advised him to stay away with me and that he was not allowed to use the phone for the rest of the day,with the latter being a rule there if you use innappropriate language and/or conduct when answering the phone.
The work shift went by pretty well.There was not really an awful lot to do.The shift went by pretty fast.As a result,I simply bagged the little bit that I did and dropped off the clean laundry at the rehab center.Afterwards,I stopped at a supermarket to pick up a few things for dinner.Tonight's dinner was pretty light.I did not eat too much.I did a little bit more personal PC work and relaxed.
I even managed to visit with a friend and his live in girlfriend and they are doing great.I was happy.While I was out,I did a virus scan on my computer and my database was clean.It is great to have a nice clean computer that is virus and spyware free.
Tomorrow night starts the weekend.I am eagerly awaiting tomorrow night because I will be singing up a storm tomorrow night.I am hoping that the night goes by well.Of course,I will be singing amidst depression of losing a friend so suddenly.But I am going to try and move on and hope to be over this soon.
That was my day today and my hoped for day tomorrow.FJ

Tonight,I am feeling okay.I had a day that was not too exciting.I did not do too much except my usual going to work this morning and going home.The work shift went by smoothly but I was still feeling the ill effects of losing a friend all so suddenly.I still find it hard to believe that he is gone.One minute he was there.The next minute he is gone.I don't know why that had to happen to him so suddenly and so young.He was still a very young man.I even shared how I felt with someone over at the social club.It was a shocker to have found out that he was dead.It is going to be tough to try and get along without him for quite some time.Again,I am still feeling the effects of this loss.It is pretty HUGE.I do not know how long it will take for me to get over this but I am going to have to do that.I can not dwell on this loss forever.I know that if I don't want to do that,I am going to need some advice on how to do that.This is the fourth consecutive death to happen where someone I knew died too fast.Again,he was at the meeting last Wednesday and now he is no longer here on earth.
When I did get home,I did some of my personal computer work and saved some for later.I only finished it because my grand nieces and grand nephew were here for much of the late afternoon.I simply went upstairs and laid down for much of the late afternoon because I did not want to be bothered by all the noise that they were making.I know that kids will make noise but I needed some quiet time for myself.So,I stayed upstairs in my room and laid down.They did leave soon when the evening was starting and I had a nice quiet dinner.I am now relaxing and getting ready for the next day,which is another work day.I am hoping that the shift goes by smoothly.I am still going to need some moral support in hopes to recover from this all too soon and sudden loss.I am still going to go to the meetings every Wednesday and I am still going to continue and try to get a lot out of them.I hope that this will be the best possible way to help me get over this sudden tragedy.
That was my day today and my hoped for day tomorrow.FJ

Tonight,I am feeling mixed emotions.The reason why I am feeling this way is because of what I had just found out tonight while at the meeting.
First off,the laundry pick-up went great.There was no mess to clean up anywhere and I dropped it off and sorted it out at the work site.Afterwards,I picked up something for dinner for myself and relaxed for much of the afternoon.I did do my personal PC work today and even that was great.The day,though it was a little HAZY & HUMID,it was actually not as that as it had been the past several days.It was great to have even minimal relief from all of that.
My appointment with my sexual abuse support counselor went great as well.We talked for almost an hour.This was my last meeting with her prior to her leaving for maternity reasons.She will be assigning me a temporary replacement counselor until she returns in January.I am going to miss her and I did wish her well on her pregnancy and that her conception goes well.
Tonight,while the meeting was wonderful.There was a certain sadness within the group tonight.Apparently,one of the members of the support group had passed away.He was killed in an auto accident.A car hit his motorcycle and he was thrown pretty severely off of his cycle and he hit the ground really hard.According to reports,he died on the way to the hospital.I had heard this on Sunday evening when watching the news.I did not know that it was one of the support group members until I got to the meeting tonight.I arrived there with joy and a lot of enthusiasm over the past few days only to be hit really hard by this tragedy.What was surprising about this was that he was at the meeting last Wednesday evening and he was full of life but now,he's gone.It is hard to believe that he is gone.One minute he was there.The next minute,he's gone.I am now wondering WHY HIM?!He was still a very young man.He was working on a reconciliation with his family when this tragedy happened.Why did it have to heappen?I am going to miss him.He wil be missed by everybody in the group and with the people that he worshipped with.
That is why I am feeling mixed emotions tonight.I was feeling joy and enthusiastic about being at the meeting because I wanted to share what went on with me over the last few days.I am also feeling sadness because a member of my support group at the church is now dead.This death was the most shocking thing to happen this week.It is also the fourth consecutive death where someone very close to me died so suddenly.One minute the people are there.The next minute they are gone.
Tomorrow is another work day.I am hoping that the shift goes by smoothly.I am hoping that the next two days go by smoothly.After the shocking and sad news that I received tonight,the next couple of days I am hoping for to go better.
That was my day today and my hopes for the next two days.FJ

Tonight,I am feeling okay.I had a pretty smooth work day today.There was no mess to clean but I did not pick up too much as far as dirty laundry.Apparently,some of the client's have not bothered to change their stuff as of yet.But I am hoping that in the next few days,there will be some to pick up.While the day went by smoothly,the day was nothing to smile about.It was HAZY,HOT,MUGGY & HUMID.The heat and humidity wore me out as I was driving home.Plus,I had to do a detour due to road reapairs on an expressway that I was driving on to make up for lost time.Fortunately,I managed to get everything that I had to do done.I also managed to finally pay my bank for a line of credit account that I have with them.Afterwards,I took it easy for much of the day and had a light dinner.
I did have minor computer issues today.I tried to connect to the internet twice but had to restart my computer both times before I finally managed to log on.I got my personal PC work done and that was it.
I also ran a personal errand for myself to get a couple of things that I personally needed.When I got home,I bathed and watched a little bit of TV.It was great to clean up and get rid of all that sweat and odor of the day.I I hear that tomorrow is supposed to be a repeat of today.We did have a little bit of rain but it did little to cool the atmosphere.Oh Well!
Tomorrow is simply a pick up day.I also have an appointment with my sexual abuse support counselor tomorrow afternoon and I also have my usual Wednesday night support group meeting at the church.I just that all goes well for me tomorrow.
That was my day today and my hoped for day tomorrow.FJ

Tonight,I am feeling pretty good.I had a very good day today.I had my first session with the counselor and the session went great.We talked for a little over two hours today in her office and it was great to finally get a lot of what I had to get off of my chest regarding what led me to having SSA and how I can go about resolving the issues.Though I did have to pay some money for the session,it was worth the money that I had paid.She also informed me that she is going to get ahold of some other group in another area to see when their next meeting will be.She said that it would be great for me to get involved with this group and share some of the same stuff that I had shared with her.Again,it was a wonderful session.I am looking forward to another session with her next month when I have some money within the next month.I had a great time talking with her.I am looking forward to talking with her again.She also informed me that she will have another lady call me who also was once in the lifestyle herself and I will be talking with her until she finds a man for me to talk to about the same issues.I am hoping that my first conversation with that lady goes over well.Again,I will talk with her until a man has been found who can talk with me about this.
After the meeting,I stopped at a Salvation Army Thrift Shop in the area and I found a couple more hard to find records there.I also found a few old tapes.It took me over an hour to get back home but the drive was well worth it.It will be great to get involved with another group.I am hoping that the other group also works out well when I meet with them.
Last night,I did go out and have a quick drink at the cafe with a few of the patrons.It was wonderful to be there and talk with them.I am looking forward to Saturday night so I can entertain them yet again.
Tomorrow is a work day I am hoping that the day goes by smoothly.After the great weekend,a smooth work day would be the right way to start.
That was my day today and my hoped for day tomorrow.FJ

Tonight,I am feeling okay.I had another not too exciting of a day today.I simply ran another errand for my mom today.It was to get a few things for the home today.It was nothing really too special.It was just to get some coffee and some donuts over at Dunkin Donuts.Before that,I paid a visit with a friend of mine to see if they had gotten the stuff that I had left them.They said that they did.But while there,I got a rude awakening.They asked me to loan them $5.00 because he was in need of his diabetic medication.I loaned them the money though I really did not want to.But I know that they will pay me the money back when they can.They also know of my policy regarding money being loaned out.They know that I will not loan them any more money until they pay me what they owe me back.I have to simply withdraw some money out of my account for lunch tomorrow.Don't get me wrong,I have no problem with them borrowing money from me and they have no problem with my policy regarding when I do this.But when I am asked to do that with money that I was holding for another reason,this really makes me feel very angry and even uncomfortable.But again,I know that I will get the money back from them when they have it.They simply told me to come back in a few days to get it back.
Last night,my night of entertaining the crowd went great.It was yet another successful night for me.I was well received as always and the crowd liked my song selections.There was a little criticism from a female patron over a couple of selections that I had made,she did like my final song,which was The Gambler by Kenny Rogers.Still,despite that criticism,it was a successful night.I had a blast and it made me feel good to entertain them as much as they enjoyed me doing it for them.That is my sole motivator.I look forward to next Saturday night even more now and every Saturday night even more.
Tomorrow is my day off.I will be seeing a counselor tomorrow afternoon that I had learned about via Exodus International.I am hoping that the first session goes over well.I am looking forward to telling the counselor my story as to what led me to have SSA and other stuff that had happened over my life.Again,I am hoping that the session goes well.
For the rest of the night,I have really no plans.But I just might stay home and take it easy or maybe go out for a quick drink before turning in.
That was my day today and my hoped for day tomorrow.FJ