Tonight,I am feeling okay.I had a pretty fair day today.
It rained for most of the day.The morning was basically rain free but when the early afternoon came,it rained and it did so for the rest of the afternoon.My feelings of sadness and depression are still here as a result of that.I am hoping that this dismal weather pattern ceases soon.We are supposed to get nicer weather starting Tuesday.I am hoping that it does happen so the roof can get fixed and we have no problems for quite a while.
Despite the rain,I did run a couple of errands.I had to pick up a few things for mom and I also had to get some gas in my tank.I also had to pick up a few prescriptions for my mom at the local drug store.After that,I headed straight home and I have not left the house since then.
When I got home,I bathed and I ate dinner.I also registered a few more bills at Where's George and I am now ready for the rest of the evening.
Tonight,I am going to be singing up a storm.I look forward to singing each and every Saturday night.I am hoping that the night works out for me.Though I rarely,if ever,have an off night,I always hope for things to go well.You never know what might happen.I still have the feeling that everything will work out right.Still,I hope.
As for the rest of the weekend,I haven't made any plans.But whatever I do,I hope that it benefits me in a positive manner.
That was my dat today and my hops for the rest of the weekend.FJ
Saturday, September 13, 2008
Friday, September 12, 2008
Tonight,I am feeling okay.I am feeling a little bit depressed and tired.I had a pretty fair day today.
The work shift went smoothly and I also had a good lunch before starting my shift.It was a pretty good work shift and I got a lot done in the period of time that I had.
The weather was what really affected my mood.It rained almost the entire day.The reason why I am feeling depressed all because of rain is because I am still hoping that the roof can get fixed soon.I am getting sick of pouring water out of the bucket that is under the leaky spot.I am hoping that this rain stops soon.Most of the rain that we are getting are the remains of Hurricane Ike as it weakens into a depression.I am hoping most of this dies down soon so the roof can get fixed because I am sick of that leak and I am tired of pouring out the water that leaks into the bucket.Not only that,we have been getting a lot of rain since this Summer.The song "Rain,Rain Go Away" is buzzing in my head constantly and I am getting rather sad as the rain is coming down.Again,I am hoping that the rain stops soon and that the roof can get fixed soon as well.
I only ran 2 errands.I went to the post office to mail out a bil that needed to be paid and I also had to buy a couple of things that my mom needed.While doing these things,I cashed my paycheck at my employers bank.When I got home,I decided to stay home for the rest of the day because there was really no place to go when the day is rainy.
After eating,I registered all the bills at the Where's George site and I also did some much needed catching up on personal PC work,which included sharing my day and how I feel on this blog here.
I am also feeling depressed because I did take a peek at some Gay porn online.I feel miserable because I am not supposed to be looking at that stuff.I am supposed to be on the path to obtaining my true gender identity and I know that looking at porn of that nature only reinforces the Homosexual/Gay identity.I am hoping that whoever reads this blog prays for me because I do need the strength to resist the temptation to look at Gay porn.I also DO NOT want to start over having sexual relations with men in any way shape or form,even though I have been having cravings to do that lately and I don't want to give up and surrender over to those unnatural desires because that isn't going to give me any positive fulfillment.Again,any prayers would be appreciated.I would also appreciate any advice on how to resist the temptation to look at Gay porn.Thanks.
I am glad that the weekend is finally here.I am looking forward to entertaining the crowd over at the place where I entertain tomorrow night and I am hoping that the evening goes well for me.As for the rest of the weekend,I have not made any plans but whatever I do,I hope that it gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes for the upcoming weekend.FJ
The work shift went smoothly and I also had a good lunch before starting my shift.It was a pretty good work shift and I got a lot done in the period of time that I had.
The weather was what really affected my mood.It rained almost the entire day.The reason why I am feeling depressed all because of rain is because I am still hoping that the roof can get fixed soon.I am getting sick of pouring water out of the bucket that is under the leaky spot.I am hoping that this rain stops soon.Most of the rain that we are getting are the remains of Hurricane Ike as it weakens into a depression.I am hoping most of this dies down soon so the roof can get fixed because I am sick of that leak and I am tired of pouring out the water that leaks into the bucket.Not only that,we have been getting a lot of rain since this Summer.The song "Rain,Rain Go Away" is buzzing in my head constantly and I am getting rather sad as the rain is coming down.Again,I am hoping that the rain stops soon and that the roof can get fixed soon as well.
I only ran 2 errands.I went to the post office to mail out a bil that needed to be paid and I also had to buy a couple of things that my mom needed.While doing these things,I cashed my paycheck at my employers bank.When I got home,I decided to stay home for the rest of the day because there was really no place to go when the day is rainy.
After eating,I registered all the bills at the Where's George site and I also did some much needed catching up on personal PC work,which included sharing my day and how I feel on this blog here.
I am also feeling depressed because I did take a peek at some Gay porn online.I feel miserable because I am not supposed to be looking at that stuff.I am supposed to be on the path to obtaining my true gender identity and I know that looking at porn of that nature only reinforces the Homosexual/Gay identity.I am hoping that whoever reads this blog prays for me because I do need the strength to resist the temptation to look at Gay porn.I also DO NOT want to start over having sexual relations with men in any way shape or form,even though I have been having cravings to do that lately and I don't want to give up and surrender over to those unnatural desires because that isn't going to give me any positive fulfillment.Again,any prayers would be appreciated.I would also appreciate any advice on how to resist the temptation to look at Gay porn.Thanks.
I am glad that the weekend is finally here.I am looking forward to entertaining the crowd over at the place where I entertain tomorrow night and I am hoping that the evening goes well for me.As for the rest of the weekend,I have not made any plans but whatever I do,I hope that it gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes for the upcoming weekend.FJ
Thursday, September 11, 2008
Tonight,I am feeling pretty good.I had a pretty good day today.
The work shift went by smoothly.I simply did what I had to do in the short period of time that I had.After my work was done,I had lunch and I bagged evereything that was clean and I dropped it off at the rehab center.After that,I went home.
When I got there,I had to go to the bank to withdraw some money for my mom and I also did a little bit of shopping for her.After that was done,I headed straight home and I stayed there for the rest of the day.I was thinking of going to the sexual addiction support group meeting but I changed my mind.I had an attack of diarrhea tonight and even after I had taken medicine for it,I had two more attacks.But after the third attack,I did not take any more medicine because I didn't want to wind up with constipation.
When I got home from shopping,I chose to take a nap,which was for only 1/2 an hour.After that,I decided to finish my personal PC work and I had dinner afterwards.
After eating,I registered some money at the Where's George site and I also visited the IMDB for a while.I was looking up some info on the 1986 Sci-Fi/Action film The Wraith,which starred Charlie Sheen in the title role.I do have this on VHS.I also did some catching up on my personal PC work.Overall,a pretty good day.
Despite having some pretty good day over this period,I am under a lot of stress.The roofers have not started yet on the roof and my mind has been drifting back and forth into my past.I have been getting tempted to act out on my desires for quite a while and I have been talking to myself pretending that there are people asking me to perform a sexual act on them and me agreeing to perform it.Last night,I did say a long but heartfelt prayer to the creator asking him for help and guidance for removing these things from my head and to help me keep my mind clear.Don't worry anyone out there,I have not acted out nor so I plan to act out.I just need some prayers to help me keep my strength to resist temptation and to avoid sinning seriously.I also have to keep in mind that acting out sexually is NOT going to fulfill the basic needs that I need to have fulfilled.I will only get the feeling that I am fulfilled but once that feeling is gone,I will still feel as empty as I was before the acting out.I have to keep track of my mind and when the temptation comes,pray about it until it goes away and then change my frame of mind and do something else.
Admittedly,I have also watched some Gay themed pornography as well.I have not watched any tonight but I have watched it and I am hoping not to fall again.Likewise,Gay porn will also NOT fulfill my basic needs,either.I also have to keep that in mind.Please pray that I will remain strong and that the creator will help keep me strong to resist temptations.
I am now relaxing and taking it easy.I am hoping that the next few days will go smoothly.
Tomorrow is another work day and I am hoping that the shift goes well.After that,it's the weekend.
That was my day today and my hopes for the day ahead.FJ
The work shift went by smoothly.I simply did what I had to do in the short period of time that I had.After my work was done,I had lunch and I bagged evereything that was clean and I dropped it off at the rehab center.After that,I went home.
When I got there,I had to go to the bank to withdraw some money for my mom and I also did a little bit of shopping for her.After that was done,I headed straight home and I stayed there for the rest of the day.I was thinking of going to the sexual addiction support group meeting but I changed my mind.I had an attack of diarrhea tonight and even after I had taken medicine for it,I had two more attacks.But after the third attack,I did not take any more medicine because I didn't want to wind up with constipation.
When I got home from shopping,I chose to take a nap,which was for only 1/2 an hour.After that,I decided to finish my personal PC work and I had dinner afterwards.
After eating,I registered some money at the Where's George site and I also visited the IMDB for a while.I was looking up some info on the 1986 Sci-Fi/Action film The Wraith,which starred Charlie Sheen in the title role.I do have this on VHS.I also did some catching up on my personal PC work.Overall,a pretty good day.
Despite having some pretty good day over this period,I am under a lot of stress.The roofers have not started yet on the roof and my mind has been drifting back and forth into my past.I have been getting tempted to act out on my desires for quite a while and I have been talking to myself pretending that there are people asking me to perform a sexual act on them and me agreeing to perform it.Last night,I did say a long but heartfelt prayer to the creator asking him for help and guidance for removing these things from my head and to help me keep my mind clear.Don't worry anyone out there,I have not acted out nor so I plan to act out.I just need some prayers to help me keep my strength to resist temptation and to avoid sinning seriously.I also have to keep in mind that acting out sexually is NOT going to fulfill the basic needs that I need to have fulfilled.I will only get the feeling that I am fulfilled but once that feeling is gone,I will still feel as empty as I was before the acting out.I have to keep track of my mind and when the temptation comes,pray about it until it goes away and then change my frame of mind and do something else.
Admittedly,I have also watched some Gay themed pornography as well.I have not watched any tonight but I have watched it and I am hoping not to fall again.Likewise,Gay porn will also NOT fulfill my basic needs,either.I also have to keep that in mind.Please pray that I will remain strong and that the creator will help keep me strong to resist temptations.
I am now relaxing and taking it easy.I am hoping that the next few days will go smoothly.
Tomorrow is another work day and I am hoping that the shift goes well.After that,it's the weekend.
That was my day today and my hopes for the day ahead.FJ
Wednesday, September 10, 2008
Tuesday, September 09, 2008
Tonight,I am feeling pretty good.I had a pretty good day today.
The work day went by smoothly.I simply did what I had to do in the period of time that I had and when that was done,I simply did what I had to do afterwards and headed for home.
On the way home,I had to visit with a friend because he needed to discuss a personal matter with me.The matter was over transferring his gas bill in my name but I decided against because I felt that this was too complicated of a matter for me to take on and plus,I am already having more than enough stress in my life as it is already.They understood and I went straight home,where I have been since coming home.
The early morning hours started with a little rain whiel I was still sound asleep.I didn't know it until I saw the dampness outside when I left for work today.Plus,my right leg was hurting me a little bit this morning.It is now feeling better but I don't know for how long.There is still the possibility of more rain during the week.There have been too many rainy days in my area this year and the roofers have not been able to start as a result.They were almost caught up until it started raining again.This has been a real drag and we have been waiting since mid-August for the weather to get better and for the rain to stop so the roof can be fixed.I am hoping and praying that the weather will be decent next week so they can start the work as hoped.I would like the roof to be fixed before the winter sets in.I need prayers.Thanks.
I am now relaxing and taking it easy.I have been home since coming home today.There is really no place to go on a day like this when there is no place open.But I am trying to make the best out of it.
Tomorrow is simply a pick-up day.I am hoping that the pick-up goes smoothly.After that,I have the afternoon off.
That was my day today and my hopes for teh day ahead.FJ
The work day went by smoothly.I simply did what I had to do in the period of time that I had and when that was done,I simply did what I had to do afterwards and headed for home.
On the way home,I had to visit with a friend because he needed to discuss a personal matter with me.The matter was over transferring his gas bill in my name but I decided against because I felt that this was too complicated of a matter for me to take on and plus,I am already having more than enough stress in my life as it is already.They understood and I went straight home,where I have been since coming home.
The early morning hours started with a little rain whiel I was still sound asleep.I didn't know it until I saw the dampness outside when I left for work today.Plus,my right leg was hurting me a little bit this morning.It is now feeling better but I don't know for how long.There is still the possibility of more rain during the week.There have been too many rainy days in my area this year and the roofers have not been able to start as a result.They were almost caught up until it started raining again.This has been a real drag and we have been waiting since mid-August for the weather to get better and for the rain to stop so the roof can be fixed.I am hoping and praying that the weather will be decent next week so they can start the work as hoped.I would like the roof to be fixed before the winter sets in.I need prayers.Thanks.
I am now relaxing and taking it easy.I have been home since coming home today.There is really no place to go on a day like this when there is no place open.But I am trying to make the best out of it.
Tomorrow is simply a pick-up day.I am hoping that the pick-up goes smoothly.After that,I have the afternoon off.
That was my day today and my hopes for teh day ahead.FJ
Monday, September 08, 2008
Tonight,I am feeling pretty good.I had a pretty good day today.
Today was my day off.I simply used the time to run a few errands for my mom.I just completed the last two errands for my mom.I am now at home relaxing.
For most of the day,I simply took it easy and relaxed.I really didn't have too much to do.I simply rested up.I also did my personal PC work while doing so.While out,I had lunch at a coffee shop and I started my run of errands.It was just a few things that my mom needed.
When I got home,I decided to lay down for a while.I also put a record on my stereo to listen to while laying down.I really wasn't tired but I felt like laying down for a bit before dinner.
After I ate,I decided to go and do the aforementioned errands for my mom.I also ran into a couple of people visiting from Boston Massachusetts.I talked with them for a while I was at the supermarket getting the last minute things that my mom needed before heading off to the local Wal-Mart to get a couple of things for myself.Overall,a pretty good day.
I am now relaxing.I am also awaiting the premiere of the second season of Terminator:The Sarah Connor Chronicles.I have been awaiting this premiere since the first run ended early this year.I am hoping that the first episode is a great one.The last run was terrific.I am hoping for another terrific run this time out.
Tomorrow is a work day.I am hoping that the day goes well.
That was my day today and my hopes for the day ahead.FJ
Today was my day off.I simply used the time to run a few errands for my mom.I just completed the last two errands for my mom.I am now at home relaxing.
For most of the day,I simply took it easy and relaxed.I really didn't have too much to do.I simply rested up.I also did my personal PC work while doing so.While out,I had lunch at a coffee shop and I started my run of errands.It was just a few things that my mom needed.
When I got home,I decided to lay down for a while.I also put a record on my stereo to listen to while laying down.I really wasn't tired but I felt like laying down for a bit before dinner.
After I ate,I decided to go and do the aforementioned errands for my mom.I also ran into a couple of people visiting from Boston Massachusetts.I talked with them for a while I was at the supermarket getting the last minute things that my mom needed before heading off to the local Wal-Mart to get a couple of things for myself.Overall,a pretty good day.
I am now relaxing.I am also awaiting the premiere of the second season of Terminator:The Sarah Connor Chronicles.I have been awaiting this premiere since the first run ended early this year.I am hoping that the first episode is a great one.The last run was terrific.I am hoping for another terrific run this time out.
Tomorrow is a work day.I am hoping that the day goes well.
That was my day today and my hopes for the day ahead.FJ
Sunday, September 07, 2008
Tonight,I am feeling okay.I had a pretty fair day today.
First off,when I woke up,I had another painful feeling in my stomach.Though I did get up to eat a bowl of cereal,I had to use the bathroom three times during the morning and it was pretty painful.
In the afternoon,I did feel a little bit better.But part of the reason why I was feeling sick was that it was raining for most of the morning.Dampness at times makes me feel sick.But as the weather improved little by little,I started feeling better.I even managed to make it out to run an errand for my mom.
While I was out,I stopped at a local shopping mall and had a light lunch.After that,I finished what I had set out to do.I had to pick up a few things for my mom at a local supermarket but I had to complete the trip at another local supermarket because the one that I went to didn't have everything that my mom wanted me to get.After that,I headed for home.
When I got home,I simply relaxed on my bed and listened to a little bit of music on my stereo.I have been spinning my vinyl records for quite a while now and that is something in this day and age.In this day and age,most people are downloading music and other things onto their IPOD'S and personal computers.The only thing is that it isn't the same.Vinyl has a much warmer and richer sound than any digital download.But with vinyl making a serious comeback in our day and age,it is amazing that these days,authentic sound is now being taken seriously again.Because with vinyl records,you are getting authentic sound.With digital downloads and compressed digital formats like CD's,it just isn't the same.
After eating dinner,I registered a few more bills at Where's George and did some catching up on last minute personal PC work.I also watched some music videos and clips from Press Your Luck on YouTube.Despite the rocky start,it was a pretty fair day today overall.
My night of entertaining the crowd went wonderfully well.It was yet another awesome night.I had a blast entertaining the crowd and they were very appreciative.I am looking forward to next Saturday night so I can do it again.For the rest of the night,I am thinking of going out and having a drink or two with the gang at the place where I entertain and I am hoping for some great talks with the guys.
Tomorrow is my day off.I am hoping that the day will be a great one.
That was my weekend and my hopes for the start of the new week ahead.FJ
First off,when I woke up,I had another painful feeling in my stomach.Though I did get up to eat a bowl of cereal,I had to use the bathroom three times during the morning and it was pretty painful.
In the afternoon,I did feel a little bit better.But part of the reason why I was feeling sick was that it was raining for most of the morning.Dampness at times makes me feel sick.But as the weather improved little by little,I started feeling better.I even managed to make it out to run an errand for my mom.
While I was out,I stopped at a local shopping mall and had a light lunch.After that,I finished what I had set out to do.I had to pick up a few things for my mom at a local supermarket but I had to complete the trip at another local supermarket because the one that I went to didn't have everything that my mom wanted me to get.After that,I headed for home.
When I got home,I simply relaxed on my bed and listened to a little bit of music on my stereo.I have been spinning my vinyl records for quite a while now and that is something in this day and age.In this day and age,most people are downloading music and other things onto their IPOD'S and personal computers.The only thing is that it isn't the same.Vinyl has a much warmer and richer sound than any digital download.But with vinyl making a serious comeback in our day and age,it is amazing that these days,authentic sound is now being taken seriously again.Because with vinyl records,you are getting authentic sound.With digital downloads and compressed digital formats like CD's,it just isn't the same.
After eating dinner,I registered a few more bills at Where's George and did some catching up on last minute personal PC work.I also watched some music videos and clips from Press Your Luck on YouTube.Despite the rocky start,it was a pretty fair day today overall.
My night of entertaining the crowd went wonderfully well.It was yet another awesome night.I had a blast entertaining the crowd and they were very appreciative.I am looking forward to next Saturday night so I can do it again.For the rest of the night,I am thinking of going out and having a drink or two with the gang at the place where I entertain and I am hoping for some great talks with the guys.
Tomorrow is my day off.I am hoping that the day will be a great one.
That was my weekend and my hopes for the start of the new week ahead.FJ
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