Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving onward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I showered.After my shower,I had my usual quick breakfast and my usual 2 cups of coffee.After breakfast,I did my personal PC work and since I had no place to go today,I chose to stay home and catch up on some much cleaning up around the house and also,caught up on some reading afterwards.
Today was simply a quiet day where I chose to catch up on some much needed things to be done around the house.
After eating,I watched the evening news for a while and I did some more personal PC work.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
While my rocky road to recovery continues moving onward,I am still,on a daily basis,dealing and struggling with the symptoms of BPD and it's accompanying emotional ride.I never know how my moods and/or emotions will be from one day to the next,or at other times,from one minute/moment to the next within the same day.If having BPD wasn't bad enough,I also have schizophrenic tendencies and that makes my BPD struggles even more difficult.I am still attending my therapy sessions.I am also continuing to take my medication as directed.I am also continuing to rely more on my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ whenever this particular struggle seems to be getting way too unbearable for me to handle.I simply take this particular struggle in prayer to my Heavenly Father and ask him in the name of his son Jesus Christ to help get me through whenever this struggle is getting seemingly way too difficult for me to handle and they both help in sustaining me.It shows that I am not alone in this particular struggle and that does make me feel a little bit better.Thanks to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
Regarding my SSA struggles,I was again tempted to indulge in masturbation when I was awakened by yet another erection.I sat up and proceeded to use the bathroom as I had to use it.As I headed for there,the erection started to soften and when I was finished,my genitals were fully soft and I went back to bed and subsequently to sleep.Though I escaped this episode,I was tempted much throughout the day to indulge in same sex fantasies and lusting of other men as sexual images of men clouded my mind.I was also tempted to manipulate my genitals to these sexual images of men.I prayed to my Heavenly Father and asked him to give me the strength to fight and resist these terrible temptations.I asked him in the name of son Jesus Christ to give me this strength as I really needed it to fight and resist these terrible temptations.I did feel stronger after praying to my Heavenly Father and I also knew as well as truly believed that he heard me and gave me what I asked for.I am also again asking that all of you who follow my blog and read my posts to please continue in praying for me as I am going through this very difficult emotional time and also,I ask that none of you be shy and please leave an encouraging word or two for me in the comments section.My blog gets many visitors and/or curiosity seekers,but comments are rarely left by anyone.Please leave me an encouraging word or two for me in the comments section.Your prayers and your encouraging are very important to me.They both help keep me going in this particular struggle and make me even more determined to continue in my determination to overcome this terrible SSA and also,to continue in my healing journey to heal from the unwanted and unnatural sexual desires that are connected with this terrible SSA.Thanks in advance to all of you for your prayers and encouragement.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,with the exception of church as usual,I haven't really got anything planned.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes and plans for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving onward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I showered.After my shower,I had my usual quick breakfast and my usual 2 cups of coffee.After breakfast,I did my personal PC work and I got dressed to proceed with the rest of the day.
I had only a couple of things to get done.I first went to the local Salvation Army thrift shop to look around and I bought only a small paperback book and after paying for that,I looked around at a couple of garage sales in my hometown and after that,I headed over to the local Super Wal-Mart to pick up a can of cooking spray.After paying for that,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I put the can of cooking spray of cooking spray away and I relaxed and did a little reading.
After eating,I watched the evening news for a while and I did some more personal PC work.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
While my rocky road to recovery continues moving onward,I am still,on a daily basis,dealing and struggling with the symptoms of BPD and it's accompanying emotional roller coaster ride.I also have schizophrenic tendencies and that makes my BPD struggles even more difficult.I am still attending my therapy sessions.I am also continuing to take my medication as directed.I am also continuing to take my medication as directed.I am also continuing to rely more on my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ whenever this particular struggle seems to be getting way too overwhelming for me to handle.I simply take this particular struggle to my Heavenly Father in the name of his son Jesus Christ and I ask him to get me through the negatives and help me endure and they both help help in not only sustaining me,but also help keep me on a calm level plain.I am never alone in this particular struggle and that makes me a tad better.Thanks to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
Regarding my SSA struggles,I gave into temptation late last night by manipulating my genitals to sexual images of me that were clouding my mind and I did ejaculate while doing this.I really felt miserable after this happened as I knew that I failed my Heavenly Father once again.I immediately went to him in prayer and asked him to forgive me sinning and I asked him this in the name of his son Jesus Christ and after I was finished praying,I felt better as I knew and truly believed that I was forgiven for my sins and that the slate was wiped clean.Throughout the day today,I was tempted again to indulge in same sex fantasies and lusting of other men.Yes,I was.But today,I had to be really tough on myself as I fought these temptations.I also kept up in prayer to my Heavenly Father in the name of his son Jesus Christ to assist me by giving me the strength to help me fight and resist these terrible temptations.I asked for strength throughout the day and I knew that I was given the strength as I did feel much stronger after I finished praying.I am again asking that all of you keep me in your prayers as I am going through this very difficult emotional time.I need your prayers and your encouragement by placing some encouraging words in the comments section.Both your prayers and your encouraging words both help keep me going in this particular fight and struggle.They also help strengthen my determination to overcome this terrible SSA and also,they motivate me to continue in my healing journey to heal from these terrible unwanted and unnatural sexual desires that are connected with this terrible SSA.It is just that my blog gets many visitors and/or curiosity seekers,but they rarely leave any comments.Please leave me some encouraging words in the comments section as I truly and desperately need some words of encouragement right now and every day.Thanks in advance to all of you for your prayers and your encouragement.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for the weekend,I have made no plans.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes and plans for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving onward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the early morning and I showered quickly.After my shower,I had my usual quick breakfast and my usual 2 cups of coffee.After breakfast,I quickly did 4/5 of my personal PC work and I got dressed to proceed with the rest of the day.
I first went to my usual spirituality group and the group meeting was wonderful as usual.After it was over,I headed over to a local kitchen for lunch and after eating that,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I relaxed for a bit and I left the house again as I had to drop off some plastic shopping bags at a recycling bin at a local supermarket and also,I turned in some bottles and cans that had accumulated in the back seat of my car and a couple of trash bags filled with bottles and cans that I picked up on the way home yesterday that someone threw out.After that,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I registered all the money that I received at the Where's George site and finished my personal PC work.After that,since my niece and her kids were over doing some work outside the house,I simply relaxed and enjoyed a little TV with them.
After eating,I watched the evening news for a while and I did some more personal PC work.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
While my rocky road to recovery continues moving onward,I am still,on a daily basis,dealing and struggling with the symptoms of BPD and it's accompanying emotional roller coaster ride.I never know how my moods and/or emotions will be from one day to the next,or at other times,from one minute/moment to the next within the same day.I also have schizophrenic tendencies and that makes my BPD struggles even more difficult.I am still attending my therapy sessions.I am also continuing to take my medication as directed.I am also continuing to rely more on my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ whenever this particular struggle seems to be getting way too overwhelming for me to handle.I simply put this struggle in the hands of my Heavenly Father.I ask him in the mane of his son Jesus Christ to help get me through the negatives of this particular psychiatric double whammy that I struggle with.They both help in not only sustaining me,but also help keep me on a calm and level plain.I am never alone in this particular struggle and that makes me feel a tad better.Thanks to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
Regarding my SSA struggles,I was again tempted to masturbate during the wee early morning hours when I was awakened by yet another erection,though it didn't last very long.I sensed that I had to use the bathroom and I headed for there.While heading there,my genitals started to soften and after I was finished,my genitals were now fully soft and I went back to bed and to sleep.Though I escaped this episode,I did give into a later temptation when sexual images of men clouded my mind after getting up and I manipulated my genitals while these were clouding my mind,but fortunately,I managed to stop myself before it went too far and I asked my Heavenly Father to forgive me for sinning in the name of his son Jesus Christ.I prayed hard and after I was finished,I felt better as I truly knew and believed that I was forgiven and that the slate was wiped clean by my Heavenly Father.I was tempted throughout the day to indulge in fantasies and lusting of other men and I kept up in prayer to my Heavenly Father all day as these temptations kept coming at me from all sides.I prayed for strength in the name of his son Jesus Christ to help me fight and resist these terrible temptations and I did feel much stronger after praying as I truly knew and believed that my Heavenly Father gave me what I asked for.I am again asking that all of you please keep up in prayer for me as I am still going through a difficult emotional time at the moment.Please continue in prayer for me and also,please leave me an encouraging word or two in the comments section.I need both your prayers and your encouraging words as they both help keep me going.They also help strengthen my determination to overcome this terrible SSA and also,to continue in my journey to heal from the unwanted and unnatural sexual desires that are connected with this terrible SSA.Thanks in advance to all of you for your prayers and your encouragement.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,I haven't made any plans.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I showered.After my shower,I had my usual quick breakfast and my usual 2 cups of coffee.After breakfast,I did my personal PC work and I got dressed to proceed with the rest of the day.
I first went to the bank to withdraw some much needed money that I had to withdraw and after that,I went and got some gas at a nearby gas station.After that,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I put the money that I withdrew in a safe place.I then relaxed and did some reading.
After eating,I watched the evening news for a while and I did some more personal PC work.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
While my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward,I am still,on a daily basis,dealing and struggling with the symptoms of BPD and it's accompanying emotional roller coaster ride.I never know how my moods and/or emotions will be from one day to the next,or at other times,from one minute/moment to the next within the same day.The up and down roller coaster ride of emotions that I am constantly on can get pretty monotonous,tiresome and emotionally draining,which can lead to emotional exhaustion.If having BPD wasn't bad enough,I also have schizophrenic tendencies and that makes my BPD struggles even more difficult.I am still attending my therapy sessions.I am also continuing to take my medication as directed.I am also still continuing to rely more on my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ whenever this particular struggle seems to be getting way too unbearable for me to handle.I simply take this particular struggle to my Heavenly Father in prayer and I tell him everything,including how I am feeling at that moment.I also ask him in the name of his son Jesus Christ to help get me through all the negatives of this particular struggle and they both help in sustaining me.They also help keep me on a calm and level plain.It shows that I am not alone in this particular struggle and that makes me feel a tad better.Thanks to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
Regarding my SSA struggles,I was again tempted to masturbate during the wee early morning hours when I was awakened by yet another erection.I sat up in bed and proceeded to get out of bed to walk around as I didn't want to masturbate the erection away.I only walked around a few minutes and when the erection softened,I went right back to bed and subsequently back to sleep.Though I escaped this episode,I was tempted throughout the day to indulge in sexual fantasies and lusting of other men and also,to manipulate my genitals for the purpose of getting them near/full erection and/or to the point of orgasm and stopping to the fantasies and lusting.I kept up in prayer to my Heavenly Father all day as these terrible temptations kept coming at me from all sides.I asked my Heavenly Father in the name of his son Jesus Christ to give me the strength to fight and resist these terrible temptations as I didn't want to sin against him.I really want to heal from these unwanted and unnatural sexual desires that I have that are connected with the terrible SSA.I did feel better and also,much stronger as I truly knew and believed that my Heavenly Father heard me and gave me what I asked for.While I have been keeping up in prayer,I am also asking for prayers by everyone who continue to follow my blog and read my posts regularly.I am always in need of prayers as I do struggle heavily with SSA.Please continue praying for me and also,please don't be shy and leave an encouraging word of two for me in the comments section.My blog gets many visitors and curiosity seekers,but comments are rarely left.I need encouraging words to continue in this fight and struggle against this terrible SSA.Your prayers and your encouraging words can work many wonders as the more that I get,the more it motivates me to continue my journey to overcome this terrible SSA and also,to heal from the unwanted and unnatural sexual desires that I have that are connected with this terrible SSA that I struggle with heavily.Thanks in advance to all of you for your prayers and your encouragement.Thanks also to both my heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
Tomorrow,I have my usual spirituality group and I will be attending that and also,to have lunch at a local kitchen.Aside from that,I have nothing else planned.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes and plans for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving onward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the early morning,but didn't shower for a while because the job placement counselor came over to the house to help me with an online job application.After a while,he left and I showered.I had my usual quick breakfast after my shower and my usual 2 cups of coffee.After that,I did all of my personal PC work and I got dressed to proceed with the rest of the day.
After completing the online application at home,I headed out to deliver some free newspapers and after that was done,I headed out to the local K-Mart to see if they had something that I was looking for,which they didn't.After that,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I relaxed and caught up on some reading.
After eating,I watched the evening news for a while and I did some more personal PC work.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
While my rocky road to recovery continues moving onward,I am still,on a daily basis,dealing and struggling with the symptoms of BPD and the accompanying emotional roller coaster ride that goes with the territory of having BPD.I also have schizophrenic tendencies and that makes my BPD struggles even more difficult.I am still attending my therapy sessions.I am also continuing to take my medication as directed.I am also still continuing to rely more on my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ whenever this particular struggle seems to be getting way too difficult for me to handle.I simply talk about this particular struggle with my Heavenly Father and I ask him,in the name of his son Jesus Christ to help get me through all the negatives up and downs of this particular psychiatric double whammy that I struggle with and they both help in sustaining me and also,they help keep me on a calm and level plain.It shows that I am not alone in this particular struggle and that does make me feel a tad better.Thanks to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
Regarding my SSA struggles,I was again tempted to masturbate during the wee early morning hours when I was awakened by yet another erection,though it didn't long.As usual,I sensed that I had to go to the bathroom and I got up and headed for there and the erection started to soften.When I was finished,the erection was fully dead and I went right back to bed and subsequently to sleep.Though I escaped this episode,I was tempted,though minimally,throughout the day to indulge in fantasies and lusting with other men.I kept busy throughout the day to take my mind off of these things and I did feel a little bit better.I went out to do my usual routine and this kept my mind clear off of anything sexual.Still,I am going to need all of your prayers and your encouraging words to help keep me going.I am always in need of prayers and encouraging words to help me in my daily struggle against SSA.Please keep up in prayer for me and also,please don't be afraid to leave an encouraging word or two for me in the comments section.Both your prayers and your encouraging words help keep me going and strengthen my determination to overcome this terrible SSA and also,to continue in my healing journey to heal from the unwanted and unnatural sexual desires that I have that are connected with this terrible SSA.Thanks in advance to all of you for your prayers and your encouragement.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,I have made no plans.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving onward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I showered.After my shower,I had my usual quick breakfast and my usual 2 cups of coffee.After breakfast,I did my personal PC work and I got dressed to proceed with the rest of the day as I had a few things planned.
I didn't have too much to do today.I had very few things.I first went to a local Dollar Tree store to see of they had what I was looking for,which they didn't.After that,I headed over to the local Super Wal-Mart to see if they had what I was looking,which they did,but I couldn't buy it at this moment.After that,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I relaxed and popped a DVD into the DVD player and I watched it.I also caught up on some reading as well.
After eating,I watched the evening news for a while and I did some more personal PC work.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading as well.
While my rocky road to recovery continues moving onward,I am still,on a daily basis,dealing and struggling with the symptoms of BPD and it's accompanying emotional roller coaster ride.I never know how my moods and/or emotions will be on a day to day basis,or at other times,from a minute/moment to minute/moment basis within the same day.I also have schizophrenic tendencies and that makes my BPD struggles even more difficult.I am still attending my therapy sessions.I am also continuing to take my medication as directed.I am also continuing to rely more on my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ whenever this particular struggle seems to be getting way too overwhelming for me to handle.I simply take this particular struggle to my Heavenly Father and ask him,in the name of his son Jesus Christ,to get me through and they both help in keeping me sustained and also,on a more calmer level plain.I am not alone in this particular struggle and makes me feel a tad better.Thanks to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
Regarding my SSA struggles,I was again tempted to masturbate during the wee early morning hours when I was awakened by yet another erection.I sat up and proceeded to the bathroom as I had to use it.After I was finished,my genitals returned to their fully softened state and I went back to bed and subsequently back to sleep.Though I escaped this episode,I was tempted throughout the day to indulge in lusting and fantasies of other men.Sexual images of men clouded my mind repeatedly and I was also tempted to manipulate my genitals alongside this,but this time,I went immediately to my Heavenly Father and asked him to give me strength to fight and resist these urges.I asked him in the name of his son Jesus Christ to give me this strength to fight and resist these overwhelming urges and after praying,I felt much better and also,I felt much stronger as I truly knew and believed that my Heavenly Father gave me what I asked for.While I did and will continue to do this,I am again asking that all of you who follow my blog and read my daily posts to please continue praying for me as I am going through all of this.I would also appreciate an encouraging word or two by all of you in the comments section as well.I need both prayers and encouraging words by all of you.My blog gets many visitors and/or curiosity seekers,but comments are rare.Please leave me an encouraging word in the comments section.Both your prayers and your encouraging words help keep me going in this particular struggle and only strength my determination to overcome this terrible SSA and to continue in healing journey to heal from these terrible unwanted and unnatural sexual desires that are connected with this terrible SSA.Thanks in advance to all of you for your prayers and your encouragement.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,I have made no plans.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving onward.I had a wonderful and eventful day today.
Today,I woke up in the early morning and I showered.After my shower,I had my usual quick breakfast and my usual 2 cups of coffee.After breakfast,I got dressed up in a suit and I headed for church for the Holy Bible study class and the worship service afterwards.
Both the class and the worship service were wonderful.Today,there was a baptism and we also had Holy Communion.After some wonderful fellowship with my fellow worshipers,I headed for home.
On the way home,I stopped at a local supermarket to pick up a gallon of milk and after paying for that,I headed over to the local K-Mart to pick up a couple of things and after paying for those,I stopped at a couple of yard sales that were in area and looked around.After that,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I got out of my suit and into a pair of lounge pants.I also did my personal PC work.When that was finished,I relaxed and popped a DVD into the DVD player and watched it.
After eating,I watched the evening news for a while and I did some more personal PC work.Overall,a wonderful and eventful day as for me,going to church on Sunday always makes the day eventful.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
While my rocky road to recovery continues moving onward,I am still,on a daily basis,dealing and struggling with the symptoms of BPD and it's accompanying emotional roller coaster ride.I also have schizophrenic tendencies and that makes my BPD struggles even more difficult.I am still attending my therapy sessions.I am also continuing to take my medication as directed.I am also continuing to rely more on my Heaven;y Father and his son Jesus Christ whenever this particular struggle seems to be getting way too overwhelming for me to handle.I simply bring this particular struggle to my Heavenly Father in prayer and I ask him in the name of his son Christ Jesus' name to help get me through the negatives of this psychiatric double whammy that I struggle with and they both help in sustaining me.It shows that I am not alone in this particular struggle and that makes me feel a tad better.Thanks to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
Regarding my SSA struggles,I was again tempted to masturbate during the wee early morning hours when I was awakened by yet another erection.I sat up and proceeded to get out of bed and that made the erection start to soften and I didn't lay back down until my genitals were fully soft.I also went back to sleep when they were.Though I escaped this episode,I was tempted throughout the day to indulge in fantasies and lusting after other men and also,to manipulate my genitals for the purpose of getting them near/fully erect and/or to the point of orgasm and stopping.I turned to my Heavenly Father in prayer as I didn't want to sin against him.I prayed really hard to my Heavenly Father and I asked him in the name of his son Jesus Christ to give me the strength to help me fight and resist the temptations to sin against him by lusting and fantasizing with sexual images of men and to manipulate my genitals alongside these images and I really prayed so hard for strength to fight and resist these overwhelming urges and after praying,I felt stronger as I truly believed that my Heavenly Father heard me and gave me what I asked for.I felt stronger after that.I am also again asking that all of you who continually follow my blog and read my posts to please continue praying for me as I am still going through a very difficult emotional time at the moment.Please continue praying for me and also,please don't be shy and leave me an encouraging word or two for me in the comments section.I need both your prayers and your encouraging words.They both keep me going and help strengthen my determination to overcome this terrible SSA and also,they motivate me to continue in my healing journey to heal from these unwanted and unnatural sexual desires that I have that are connected with this terrible SSA.Thanks in advance to all of you for your prayers and encouragement.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,I have made no plans.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes for the day ahead.FJ