Tonight,I am feeling okay.I had a pretty good day today.
When I got up out of bed,I ate a quick breakfast and I did my personal PC work.There wasn't an awful lot to do PC wise so I just browsed for a while online looking up information on medication and their side effects.I have been doing this for quite some time because I am currently taking medication for a psychiatric problem that I have and I want to gain some knowledge of prescription medictaion and the side effects that they might have when they are taken by people.I have learned some of the side effects that are a part of the medicine that I am currently taking and again,I need to know all of this to gain some knowledge.
After doing all of this,I ran out to run an errand for my mom.I had to pick up a few things that were needed.After getting all of these things,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I decided to lay down and tried to take a nap.Try as I did,I couldn't even take a nap.I have been having problems sleeping as of late.I wake up in the early morning hours to use the bathroom and I can't get back to sleep once I get back into bed.I will have to talk this over with the nurse practitioner over at the local hospital to see what advice she might have on how to deal and handle this.I want to get my usual sleep and there have been problems with this and I would like to know what I can do to stop this.I am hoping that the nurse practitioner can help me out with this.I will be seeing her this coming Monday and I am hoping to get a reasonable and helpful solution.
Today,during the afternoon,I called a couple of suicide hotlines.Don't worry readers,I AM NOT CONTEMPLATING NOR AM I EVEN THINKING OF CONTEMPLATING SUICIDE.I only called them because I was looking for depression hotlines online and these were the only two phone numbers that I got.I called them and the people that talked with me simply gave me some helpful advice on how to handle the funk that I am currently in and to simply talk it over with the nurse practitioner when I go to meet with her on Monday.I will be doing that the minute that I see her on Monday and as stated,I am hoping for any reasonable and helpful solutions that will help get me out of this funk that I am currently in.Again,I am hoping for something helpful.
After talking with the first person,I bathed for a while to clean up as my mom prepared dinner for the both of us.
After eating,I decided to do some more personal PC work and I also called the other hotline and talked with a lady about the funk that I am currently in.She listened toi every word that I said and I listened to her.It was a pleasant conversation and I did feel a little bit better as a result.
Tonight,I am going out to sing a little for my friends.I am hoping for a nice evening and a lot of positive responses.Though I rarely have a bad night,I still hope for things to go well.
Regarding my SSA struggles,I haven't felt any sexual feelings towards any men today.That is the only good thing to come out of this.Though I am in a depressive funk,I am having no cravings to indulge in anything sexual with a man.
As for tomorrow,I am hoping to get to the laundromat to do my underwear.I am hoping that everything goes well as planned.
That was my day today and my hopes for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,I am feeling okay.I had a great day today.
The company picnic was nice.Yes,I did eat quite a bit of food and I was full,mostly from drinking a couple of bottles of bottled water.But again,I did eat quite a bit.I was going to go swimming in the pool but I changed my mind.After watching some fun stuff,I headed for home.
On the way home,I stopped to check up on a friend of mine to see how he was but he wasn't home.I am hoping that he is okay and I am also hoping,weather permitting,to check up on him tomorrow hoping to catch him at home.I headed straight home after that.
When I got home,I got out of my clothes and I relaxed for a bit.I also watched another After School Special on that DVD set that I have because I was feeling bored and I wanted something to cheer me up.It was nice watching that and after that,I continued to relax for a bit.I also did my personal PC work,which I hadn't had a chance to get to all day due to the social club being temporarily closed and going to the company picnic.But I did hear from the social club coordinator that it will be open on Monday and things will return to normal very soon.
After eating a light dinner,I watched the evening news for a while and I did some more personal PC work.
I am feeling a little bit better than I did yesterday.I am not feeling as depressed as I was yesterday.The depressive funk that I am in is slowly disappearing.I am hoping that the funk will be over with soon and I will be back to normal.I was feeling really good as a result of me talking to my father and learning to let go of the anger that I felt towards him as well as forgiving him for what he did to the family over the years,including the horrible paternal abuse that I had to endure from his hand.Now,I am in a depressive funk that although is slowly disappearing,I still feel that it doesn't want to leave.But again,I am slowly getting out of it and I am hoping to fully get out of it soon.The only drawback is that I still haven't heard from the nurse practitioner at the local hospital.I guess that what I have to tell her is going to have to wait until Monday afternoon when I have an appointment with her.As stated,I understand that she is a busy person with a lot of cases and clients to be seen but I still feel that she still can spare a few minutes to see what a client has to tell her.I wanted to tell her about the funk that I had been in and what I had been thinking about since our last session.I also wanted to tell her about some of the side effects that I have been dealing with as a result of the medication that I am currently taking and see if I can give another medication a try that doesn't have any of the side effects that this one has.Again,I am hoping that I can talk with her about these things and I am also hoping that she will be understanding.
The only really good thing is that all of that is not affecting my SSA struggles.I am also not having any temptation to watch any pornography.
I know that I have been rambling a lot as of late.But I need to get what I have to say off of my chest and I am also looking for some support through some of the negatives that are going on in my life at the moment.If there is anyone out ther reading what I am posting on here,please share any words of encouragement that will really help me out.I would really appreciate that.Thanks.
Tomorrow is the start of the weekend.I am hoping that the weekend goes well for me.
That was my day today and my hopes for the weekend ahead.FJ

Tonight,I am feeling okay.I had a pretty good day today.
The work shift went smoothly.The laundry pick-up also went smoothly with no messes to clean up.After sorting out the laundry,I started a load and simply waited for the load to get done in the cellar.
After the shift was over,I dropped the laundry off at the rehab center and went to have my lunch at the location where the social club is meeting until the regular place opens back up.After eating my lunch,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I did a little bot of personal PC work and took my mom to a local supermarket to do her grocery shopping for the month.
When we got home,we sorted out the groceries and put them in their proper places.After helping her out,I finished my personal PC work and as a result of the hard day,my mom and I decided to order out for dinner rather than have her prepare something.We made only one more supermarket stop before I went to get some sandwiches at a local Wendy's for dinner.
After eating,I watched the evening news for a while and I posted my day on here.Overall,a pretty good day.
I am only feeling a slight depression at the moment.But I am feeling hopeful that I will get over this funk that is currently upon me.This spell has been with me for over a week,which is the longest that I have been in something like this.I am hoping to be over this soon.I have been leaving messages for the nurse practitioner at the local hospital to call me so I could tell her about this but she hasn't even returned one phone call.If I don't hear from her tomorrow,I will have to wait until Monday to talk with her.I hate waiting a long time to tell someone what is going on with yourself.I feel that when you need to talk,you should always have a listening ear to hear you when you need to talk.Don't get me wrong,I understand that the nurse practitioner is a busy person who has to deal with different clients each and every day.But I feel that it only takes a few minutes to see what a person has to say to you and whatever advice or any sort of words that you can give can be vital to a person's survival.Again,I guess that I will have to wait until Monday to talk with her if I don't hear from her soon.
Regarding my SSA struggles,I am having the temptation to look at pornography.But I am not going to give into the temptation.The minute that I am done here,I am going to close off the internet and run another errand for my mom.
Tomorrow is the day of the company picnic.I am hoping that the picnic will be a great one.
That was my day today and my hopes for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,I am feeling pretty good.I had a pretty good day today.
The laundry pick-up went smoothly.There were no messes to clean up and that was great.I simply dropped off the laundry at the worksite and sorted it all out.After eating lunch,I proceeded to get on with my day.Before I did anything else,I ate breakfast and I also did my personal PC work.
I first went to the post office to mail a letter for my mom and I also went to the local UPS station to drop off something that my mom needed to return.I headed for home to pick up something that I needed to take with me to the doctor.
When I got to the doctor's office,I had to wait a while and when they finally called me,they did the usual things that they needed to do such as get my blood pressure and check my blood sugar.I also had to provide a urine sample for the doctor to check out to see if there was anything wrong.Fortunately,the doctor found nothing wrong and that really relieved me.I told the doctor about my frequent urination and he simply advised me to tone down on the amount of liquids that I consume,especially at night before going to sleep.I left the office feeling a little bit relieved and hopeful.Despite what the doctor said,I still have the feeling that it has something to do with the psychiatric medication that I am currently taking.When I got the handout,one of the side effects listed was a "change in the amount of urine."The minute that I meet with the nurse practitioner over at the local hospital,I am going to talk with her about all of this and I am hoping that we both can come to an understanding.I really hate it that I am enduring this at the moment and I am hoping that I won't have to endure it after Monday when I meet with the nurse practitioner.I am hoping that I can probably try out a new medication that doesn't have the side effect of excessive urination.After leaving the office,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I made a few phone calls to find where I could buy sunscreen for my face.I am going to a company picnic on Friday and I am planning to go swimming in the area pool.I just want to make sure that I am prepared with enough sunscreen so I will be protected from any sunlight that will shine on Friday.I found sunscreen for my face cheap at the local Wal-Mart.I went out to get it and I headed straight home again.
When I got home,I told my mom about what the doctor said and that everything was okay.I registered a couple of one dollar bills at the Where's George site and I also did some more personal PC work.
After eating,I watched the evening news for a while and I also decided to post my day on here.Overall,a pretty good day.
I am not feeling any depression at the moment.I am slowly getting out of the funk that I have been in since last Saturday.I am hoping to be out of this funk very soon.I am not feeling anything negative at the moment and that is good.I know that negative emotions will never go away and I will be feeling them when I least expect it.But for now,I am glad to not be feeling anything negative at the moment.
Regarding my SSA struggles,I can safely say that I am not feeling any of those feelings at the moment.
Tomorrow is a work day.I am hoping that the shift goes well.
That was my day today and my hopes for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,I am feeling okay.I had a pretty mixed day today.
The work day went a little rough.The laundry pick-up went well but the roughness that I had was when I arrived at the worksite.There was a load left behind by the person who did the laundry the previous day and not only that,there were also a couple of blankets left in a dryer that were really wet.I had to use most of my day to finish off what the guy didn't finish and to get my work going.
Not only that,the social club is temporarily closed as a result of a sewage problem that stunk the whole place up.As a result of this,I couldn't start to do any personal PC work while on break from work and I also had to go to another location to eat lunch and I almost didn't get one as a result of the chaos.I had to spend the entire day in the basement concentrating on my job and to try and forget about the negativisms of the day,which wasn't easy.I did manage to ask periodically how the clean up was going and I did get some good news from the coordinator that the clean up was progressing and that they were hoping to get the social club opening up soon.I am hoping so because it was a pretty dull day sitting in that cellar all alone with nothing to read or not having anyone to talk to while waiting for the load to get done.But I managed to get through the day and when the day was over,I dropped off the clean laundry at the rehab center and I headed for home.
On the way home,I had to make one stop.It was at a local supermarket to get change for a ten dollar bill that belonged to my mom because she wanted it a certain way that I didn't get it when I withdrew it for her from our regular bank.It is now the way she wants it so she can use it to pay someone that she owes money to.After that,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I registered all the bills on the Where's George site and I also finally got around to doing my personal PC work.Despite some issues with the internet browser that I was using,I got it done.It wasn't easy but I managed to do everything online that I set out to do.After closing the internet off,I relaxed and watched a little bit of TV.
After eating,I watched the evening news for a while.I also posted my day on here.Overall,it was a pretty mixed day and I am hoping that tomorrow will be better.
I am not feeling any depression at the moment.I am feeling okay and I am hoping that the rest of the evening goes well enough.I still have one more thing to do before I can call it a day.I am hoping to do it after I am finished posting on here.
Regarding my SSA struggles,I had no problems.I have had no cravings nor images creeping up into my mentality lately.This is a great thing.Still,I need to take this as a "One Day At A Time" thing where if I get through the day without any problems,there is still the day after and so on.I am hoping that tomorrow will be problem free.
Tomorrow is simply a pick-up day.I am hoping that the pick-up goes well.I also have that follow-up appointment with the doctor as a result of my emergency room visit over the weekend.I am hoping that the follow-up goes well with good news.
That was my day today and my hopes for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,I am feeling okay.I had a pretty good day today.
Today was my day off from work.I really didn't have to much to do.After eating a quick breakfast,I did my personal PC work.I also did a little bit more research on prescription drugs and their side effects.After doing all of that,I decided to relax and take it easy.
I did hear from the doctor's office today.They wanted to inquire as to why I had called the office over the weekend.I told them that it was over the frequent urination that I was struggling with over the weekend and that I had to go to the emergency ward over at the local hospital as a result of it becoming pretty bothersome.I scheduled an appointment for this week and I am hoping that the appointment will go well.I am hoping that the doctor will give me some good news.
I had only one small errand to run.I had to go to a friend of my mom's house to pick up something that my mom had purchased from her and that was the only thing that I did today.
After coming home,I laid down for a bit because I felt tired.The only problem was that I couldn't really get to sleep.I was trying to take a nap.I felt tired but couldn't get any nap time in.I guess that it's a side effect of the medication that I am currently taking that was prescribed for me by the practitioner over at the local hospital.I was yawning for much of the day and just feeling pretty tired even though I didn't do too much.Plus,it was also a pretty dull afternoon because we did have some rain for a little bit of the day and some thunder and lightning.
After eating,I decided to do some last minute personal PC work.I checked my e-mail to see if there were any new messages and I posted my day on here.Overall,a pretty good day.
Regarding my SSA struggles,I had no problems.I had no cravings nor images creeping up into my mentality nor did I watch any pornography in any way,shape or form.I am hoping to get through tomorrow without any problems.
Though I am feeling okay,I am still feeling a little bit of depression.I have been feeling this funk of depression for a little over a week.I am still holding onto the hope that this will pass and that I will feel better.I am sick of this depression and again,I am hoping that this will pass.
Tomorrow is a work day and I am hoping that the day goes smoothly.
That was my day today and my hopes for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,I am feeling okay.I had a pretty good day today.
For starters,I had a quick breakfast and I did my personal PC work.I also registered some bills at the Where's George site this morning.I also did some research on prescription drugs on a drug store website for the rest of the morning and also looked up other things regarding them.For most of the afternoon,I simply took it easy and relaxed.
I had only one small errand to run.My mom wanted me to go to a local Dollar General store to pick up a couple of things that she needed.After paying for the items,I headed back home to await for dinner to get done.On the way home,I did stop to get some gas in my tank.
Before running out to do the errands,I called my regular doctor's office to talk with the doctor about my emergency room visit yesterday.I told her the results of what they told me and I told her that I would be coming into the office to set up an appointment as a follow-up and I am hoping that the follow-up will also go well when I can get one.As stated,I am glad that there was nothing wrong and that the problem wasn't too serious.But I am still going to take the advice of the emergency room doctors and get that follow-up.The sooner that I can get it the better.
After eating,I watched some of the evening news and I did some last minute personal PC work.
Last night,my night of entertaining the crowd went well.It was a pretty good night despite that it started out dead but it soon got some people.There was also a fight outside the place last night when a couple of guys came after a few of the patrons with baseball bats and even threw empty beer bottles.The NYS police were called but the guys who instigated the whole thing took off running before they even showed up.But the rest of the evening was cool,calm and serene.I am just hoping that this doesn't happen again for a long time to come.Fortunately,the fight didn't spoil the evening.
Though I am feeling okay,I am also feeling a little depressed.I really don't know why I am in this funk but as stated,I am hoping that the spell will pass soon.It will be a week starting tomorrow that I will be seeing the nurse practitioner and I will just have to hang in there until then.I am hoping to talk with her this Wednesday when she will be back from her vacation.
Regarding my SSA struggles,I have not been feeling the negative feelings of attraction as of late.I am not having any cravings nor images creeping up into my mentality.That is pretty good.I am hoping that I can get through the new week unscathed.
Tomorrow is my day off.I am hoping that the day will go well.
That was my day today and my hopes for the start of the new week ahead.FJ