Tonight,my road to recovery continues to go forward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and,after helping my mom out for a few minutes,I bathed.After my bath,I had my usual quick breakfast and my usual 2 cups of coffee.After breakfast,I did my personal PC work and I got dressed to proceed with the rest of my day.
I only had one errand to run.I simply went to a local supermarket to pick up a couple of things that were needed.After paying for those things,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I put all the stuff that I bought away and I helped out with the clean-up over at the house.I had only a little bit to do today and when I was done,I relaxed and took it easy for a while.
After eating,I watched the evening news for a while and I did some more personal PC work.Overall,a pretty good day.
While my road to recovery continues to go forward,I am still battling the symptoms of BPD on a daily basis.I am always on a constant emotional roller coaster ride and it can get pretty monotonous at times.I don't know if I will be up and feeling good or down and feeling not so good.At times,it happens all on the same day.I also have schizophrenic tendencies and that makes it even more difficult.I am still attending my therapy sessions.I am still taking my medication as directed.I am also still relying on God and his son Jesus Christ more whenever the struggle seems to be way too unbearable for me to handle.I simply take it to both God and Christ and they help keep me sustained and cool.I have nothing to fear nor worry about with them leading the way and taking control.It doesn't make the struggle any easier,but it does make it only a tad bearable.Thanks to both God and his son Jesus Christ for being there and for always taking the lead.
Regarding my SSA struggles,I was tempted to masturbate in the wee early morning hours when I was awakened by a throbbing erection.I had to really use all of my strength to fight and resist this overwhelming temptation.I simply sat up and as while I did,the erection slowly died down and after helping my mom to the bathroom and back to bed,I went back to sleep.Though I escaped this episode,I still have to keep in mind that the temptation to act out on these unnatural desires that I have,no matter what form it might take,can rear it's ugly head when least expected.The temptation can be a very overwhelming one at that.I want to do the right thing,but the unnatural desires that I have want me to do the opposite.Even when it does seem to get too overwhelming,I still rely on God and his son Jesus Christ a lot more whenever the struggle seems to get too overwhelming.I simply take the temptation to God in the name of his son Jesus Christ and after that,the temptation is nil.I can then move on with the rest of the day.If I ever do give into any temptations,I simply ask God in the name of his son Jesus Christ to forgive me for that and after that,the slate is wiped clean and I feel better after doing that.It is wonderful that I am not alone in my struggles and that is very reassuring.Thanks to both God and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do.
Tomorrow,it is church as usual,including the morning's Holy Bible study class before the worship service.I will also help with the clean-up tomorrow if and when needed.
That was my day today and my hopes and plans for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,my road to recovery continues onward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the late morning and I bathed.After my bath,I had my usual quick breakfast and my usual 2 cups of coffee.After breakfast and in between helping out my mom,I did my personal PC work and I got dressed to proceed with the rest of the day as I had some important stuff that I needed to do.
I first went to a local supermarket to pick up a few things that I needed.After that,I headed over to a local shopping mall for a few other things.After that was done,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I put everything that I bought away and I got ready for my appointment with the pastor for our personal one on one studies.I headed over there with a lot of positive anticipation and enthusiasm.
The study session went great.After it was over,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I relaxed only for a short spell.
After eating,I watched the evening news for a while and I did some more personal PC work.Overall,a pretty good day.
My recovery is moving onward,but it is still a rough and rocky road ahead.I am still,on a daily basis,dealing and struggling with BPD and the emotional roller coaster rode that goes with it.It is a constant fight and struggle that I deal and struggle with,but I am still hanging in there.I don't know if I will be up and feeling good or down and not so good.It sometimes happens all on the same day.Aside from that,I also have schizophrenic tendencies and that makes the struggle even more difficult.It also makes my struggles with SSA even more difficult.I still attend my therapy sessions.I still take my medication as directed.I am still relying on God and his son Jesus Christ more whenever the struggle seems to be feeling to unbearable to endure.With them,I simply throw it on them and I feel a little bit better.It is a matter of having them take over and sustaining me.Thanks to both of them for all their help and direction.
Regarding my SSA struggles,I gave into temptation by masturbating two consecutive times over the last 12 hours.I gave into it late last night and in the wee early morning hours today.It was a combination of emotional and sexual images of men clouding my mind.On both of these occasions,I asked God in the name of his son Jesus Christ to forgive me for falling on both of these occasions and after begging God for his mercy and forgiveness as a result of my falling,I did feel better as the slate is wiped clean.I have really been tempted as of late as a result of all the stress that has been happening in my life at this moment.My mom getting hurt,my sisters taking over the house like Grant took Richmond when it comes to getting the house cleaned up for our conveniences and everything else that has been happening.I was really sorry for falling on both of these occasions.I have to really start getting serious about this and make it a habit of taking this God and Christ whenever temptations starts to rear it's ugly head when least expected.I have to make that a habit or else I will be falling constantly.I hate it when I fail as I at times feel that I am not doing enough to resist these temptations.I ask for prayers by those who are reading and following this blog of mine.They are always appreciated.I really need prayers right now.I am struggling and getting tempted like crazy.Thanks in advance for all the prayers offered.
As for the weekend,with the exception of church,I have made no plans.But I am hoping that whatever I choose to gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes and plans for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,my road to recovery continues to go forward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the early morning,after helping my mom out,and I bathed.After my bath,I had my usual quick breakfast and my usual 2 cups of coffee.After that,I hurriedly did my personal PC work and I got dressed to proceed with the rest of the day.
I had some things on my agenda today.I first went to my usual Thursday spirituality group and I was looking forward to that group with a lot of positive anticipation and enthusiasm.
The group meeting was wonderful.After it was all over,I headed over to a local kitchen to have myself some lunch and after I was finished,I headed for home.
On the way home,I stopped to check on a couple of friends to see how they were doing.After spending a few minutes with them,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I helped out with some more cleaning up around the house.There was still a lot to get done.
After eating,I watched the evening news for a while and I did some more personal PC work.Overall,a pretty good day.
While my recovery continues to go forward,I am still,on a daily basis,dealing and struggling with the symptoms of BPD and the emotional roller coaster ride that goes with the territory of having BPD.I never know how my mood will be from day to day or at times,from moment to moment.I never know if I will be up and feeling good or down and not so good.It is just an endless cycle of things.Aside from that,I also have schizophrenic tendencies and that makes it even more difficult.I have to also continually put up with hearing things that other people don't hear.I am still attending my therapy sessions and I am continuing to take my medication as directed.I am also continuing to rely on God and his son Jesus Christ more whenever this struggle seems to get out of hand.I simply talk to them about it and after that,I feel a little bit better.The struggle with BPD and schizophrenic tendencies is a difficult struggle indeed,but I am managing.Thanks to both God and Christ for everything.
Regarding my SSA struggles,I was again tempted to masturbate in the wee early morning hours when I was awakened by yet another throbbing erection.The urge to masturbate was really overwhelming and I had to use all of my strength to fight and resist this temptation.I simply sat up and I didn't lay back down until the erection died down.Though I escaped this episode,I still have to keep in mind that the temptation to act out on these unnatural desires that I have can rear it's ugly head when least expected.I am always in a constant battle over these desires and my desire to do the right thing in God's eyes.I want to always do the right thing,but these unnatural desires that I have want me to indulge in sinful sexual activity.Still,I am relying on God and his son Jesus Christ more whenever the struggles seems way too unbearable to handle.Whenever I get tempted,I simply take it to both God and Christ in prayer and after that,the temptation is nil.I do it whenever temptation comes around.After throwing it on both God and Christ,I feel better and I can move on with the rest of the day.If I get tempted again before the day is through,I simply throw it again on both God and Christ and it is again nil.If I do give into temptation,I simply ask God in the name of his son Jesus Christ to forgive me and I feel better.Thanks to both God and Christ for all of their help.
Tomorrow,I have an appointment with the pastor to continue my studies with him.As for the rest of the day,I have no other plans.But whatever I do,I hope that it gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes and plans for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,my road to recovery continues onward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I,after I helped my mom out and after my niece took over,I bathed.After my bath,I had my usual quick breakfast and my usual 2 cups of coffee.After breakfast,I did my personal PC work and I got dressed to proceed with the rest of the day.My niece stayed at the house for much of the day.
I stayed home for much of the day helping out with the cleaning up.It was a lot of work to do and all,but we got a lot more done than we planned on getting done.It took several hours,but we got more done and I also ran errands when I had to run them.After several hours,my sisters left and I relaxed for a while as I was tired.
After eating,I watched the evening news for a while and I did some more personal PC work.Overall,a pretty good day.
While my recovery continues onward,I am still,on a daily basis,dealing and struggling with the symptoms of BPD and the emotional roller coaster ride that goes with it.I don't know how I will be from day to day or from minute to minute within the same day.I don't know if I will be up and feeling good or down and not so good.The emotional roller coaster ride can get pretty monotonous at times.Aside from that,I also have schizophrenic tendencies and that makes my BPD struggle even more difficult.While that can be so,I am still continuing to rely on God and his son Jesus Christ more whenever the struggle seems to get way too difficult for me to handle.I simply talk to them about it and afterwards,I feel a little bit better.Thanks to both of them for everything.
Regarding my SSA struggles,I was again tempted to masturbate in the wee early morning hours when I was awakened by yet another throbbing erection.I simply got up as I had to get up and help my mom out because she had to go to the bathroom.After helping her out,I went back to sleep.I was fortunate for that as that was my means of escape.Though I escaped this episode,I still have to continually stay on guard and be watchful.The temptation to act out on these unnatural desires that I have,no matter what form it might be,can rear it's ugly head when least expected.I am always in a fight against these unnatural desires and the temptations that I get to act out on them.The struggle to do the right thing in the eyes of God can be a really difficult one.The unnatural desires that I have want me to indulge in sinful sexual activity with other men,but I want to do the right thing and NOT act out on these unnatural desires that I have.The desires that I have want me to do the opposite,but I simply have chosen to NOT act out on them.Though the struggle is a difficult one,I am still relying on God and his son Jesus Christ more whenever it seems to be getting too unbearable for me to handle.I simply throw the temptations onto God in the name of his son Jesus Christ and they both help sustain me.I simply talk about the temptation until the temptation is nil and after that,I can move on with the rest of the day.If it happens again on the same day,I simply take it to God in the name of his son Jesus Christ again and after that,I continue moving forward.If I do give into any temptation,I simply ask God in the name of his son Jesus Christ to forgive me for that and after that,I feel better as the slate is wiped clean.Thanks to both God and his son Jesus Christ for taking the wheel,leading the way and guiding me away from anything evil.
Tomorrow,I have a spirituality group that I must attend and a lunch at a local kitchen.Aside from that,I have nothing else planned.But I am hoping that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes and plans for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,my road to recovery continues onward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I bathed.After my bath,I had my usual quick breakfast and my usual 2 cups of coffee.After breakfast,I did my personal PC work and after that was done,I helped out my sisters and my niece with the clean-up around the house.
My mom came home yesterday and we are still working on getting the house cleaned up for her.We are halfway there and it is coming along good.We might be finished by the end of the week and I think that it will look good after it is finally finished.
The clean-up took several hours and after they were done for the evening,my sisters and my niece headed for home and my mom went back to bed and I relaxed for a while.
After eating,I watched the evening news for a while and I did some more personal PC work.Overall,a pretty good day.
My recovery continues onward,but it is still a rough and rocky road that I am on.I am still,on a daily basis,dealing and struggling with the symptoms of BPD and the emotional roller ride that goes with having BPD.I really don't know how I will be from one day to the next or from one minute to the rest.I simply don't know how I will be.Aside from that,I also have schizophrenic tendencies and that makes it even more difficult.While that is so,I am still relying on God and his son Jesus Christ whenever the struggle seems to be getting too difficult to handle.I simply talk to them about it and after that,I feel a little bit better.When they take the lead,I have really nothing to fear nor worry about.Thanks to the both of them for all that they do.
Regarding my SSA struggles,I was again tempted to masturbate in the wee early morning hours when I was awakened by yet another throbbing erection.I really had to use all of my own strength to fight and resist this temptation as it was a really overwhelming temptation.I simply started to sit up and the erection started to soften.I sat up for a while until the erection was gone.After that,I went back to sleep.Though I did escape this episode,I am still staying on guard and being watchful as the temptation to act out on the unnatural desires that I have,no matter what form they take,can rear it's ugly head when least expected.I simply don't know when it will strike.Still,whenever it happens,I can simply take it to both God and his son Jesus Christ by simply talking about the temptation.I simply throw it on them and put it in both of their hands.After that,the temptation is nil.I feel better after telling both God and Christ about that and I can then move on with the rest of the day.If it happens that I do give into the temptation,I simply go to God and him in the name of son Jesus Christ to forgive me for my falling and after that,I can move on.Thanks to both God and Christ for being there whenever they are needed.With them leading the way and taking the wheel,I can overcome anything.
As for tomorrow,I have made no plans.But whatever I choose to do,I hope that it gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,my road to recovery continues onward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I bathed.After my bath,I had my usual quick breakfast and my usual 2 cups of coffee.After breakfast,I did my personal PC work and I got dressed to proceed with the rest of the day.
I first went to my usual Monday afternoon building and improving self esteem group and I was looking forward to it.I headed over there with a lot of positive anticipation and enthusiasm.
The group went well.After it was over,I headed over to the hospital to spend a few minutes with my mom and after that,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I called my niece over to help me with some more cleaning up around the house and later on,my sisters came over to help out more.The cleaning took several hours,but we did get a lot more done.After they left,I relaxed and watched a little bit of TV.
After eating,I watched a little more TV and I did some more personal PC work.Overall,a pretty good day.
While my recovery moves onward,I am still,on a daily basis,dealing and struggling with the symptoms of BPD and the emotional roller coaster ride that goes with the territory of having BPD.It is never an easy thing to deal with and it does get really hard at times.I don't know if I will be up and feeling good or down and not so good.I also have schizophrenic tendencies and that makes it even more difficult.Each and every day has it's own difficulties.Then again,I am still relying on God and his son Jesus Christ more whenever the struggle seems to be getting too unbearable.I simply take it to them and they help sustain me.I feel a little bit better once I have taken it to both God and Christ and I can simply move on after that.Thanks to both God and Christ for all of their help.
Regarding my SSA struggles,I was again tempted to masturbate in the wee early morning hours when I was awakened by yet another throbbing erection.It was also another overwhelming urge as I really had to fight to resist this temptation.I simply started sitting up and the erection started to soften and after a few minutes,I laid back down and went back to sleep.Though I escaped this episode,I have to continually keep in mind that the temptation to act out on these unnatural desires that I have can rear it's ugly head when least expected.The urge to give into this temptation can be very overwhelming indeed.I am always at war with the desire to do the right thing in God's eyes and to indulge in the sinful sexual activity that is associated with the so called "Gay" lifestyle.My battle to continue doing to right thing still rages on.But as I have said before,I still continue to rely on God and his son Jesus Christ more when the urge to indulge in anything sinful seems to get too overwhelming.Whenever the temptation to act out comes around and the temptation is really strong,I simply take it to God in the name of son Jesus Christ and I really talk it out to them and afterwards,I feel better.I then can move on with the rest of the day.It is wonderful to have God and Christ leading the way and not letting me be really overwhelmed by temptation.It is great.Thanks to both and Christ for all of their help.
As for tomorrow,I have made no plans.But whatever I choose to do,I hope that it gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,my road to recovery continues forward.I had a wonderful and eventful day today.
Today,I woke up in the early morning and I bathed.After my bath,I had my usual quick breakfast and my usual 2 cups of coffee.After breakfast,I did my personal PC work and after that,I got dressed to proceed with the rest of the day as I had so much planned.
Today,we had a special outdoor church service at a park where there was a picnic after that.The worship service was wonderful and I had a very good time at the picnic afterwards.After spending several hours talking with church members and others,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I relaxed for a spell and after that,joined my family while they were cleaning up the house to prepare for my mom's return home,which is supposed to be sometime this coming week.I am hoping that my mom recovers soon.
After doing some work around the house,I relaxed and did some recommended Holy Bible reading.
After eating,I watched the evening news for a while and I did some more personal PC work.Overall,a wonderful and eventful day.To me,going to church each and every Sunday makes the day eventful.
While my recovery continues to go forward,I am still dealing and struggling,on a daily basis,with the symptoms of BPD and the emotional roller coaster ride that goes with it.I am usually on a constant ride with my emotional make up and at times,it gets pretty difficult.I don't know if I will be up and feeling good or down and feeling not so good.At times,it happens within the same day.I also schizophrenic tendencies and that makes the struggle even more difficult.I am still attending my therapy sessions and I am continuing to take my medication as directed.I am also continuing to rely on God and his son Jesus Christ more whenever the struggle seems to be too unbearable to handle.It is never easy struggling with BPD or schizophrenic tendencies,but with God and Christ's help,it makes it a tad easier.I simply take it to God in the name of his son Jesus Christ and after that,I do feel a little bit better,though I am still dealing with the issues.Thanks to both God and Christ for all of their help.
Regarding my SSA struggles,I was again tempted to masturbate in the wee early morning hours when I was awakened by yet another erection.I simply sat up and the erection died down while I was sitting up.After a few minutes,I went back to sleep.Though I escaped this episode,I still keep in mind that the temptation to act out on these unnatural desires that I have can rear it's ugly head when least expected and I have to stay on guard and be watchful at all times.The temptations to act out can be very overwhelming at times.When that happens,I simply rely on God and his son Jesus Christ whenever the struggle seems to be getting too difficult to handle.I simply thrown the temptation on God in the name of his son Jesus Christ and after I am finished praying,the temptation is reduced to nil.I always feel better whenever I pray the temptation away.The struggle with SSA is never an easy one,but with the help and leading of both God and his son Jesus Christ,I can escape and be sustained.Thanks to both God and his son Jesus Christ for all of their help.
Tomorrow,I have a group that I must attend.Aside from that,I have no other plans.But whatever I choose to do,I hope that it gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes and plans for the day ahead.FJ