Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I had my usual 2 cups of coffee.After my coffee,I showered quickly and when I was finished,I got dressed and had my usual quick breakfast.After breakfast,I did my personal PC work.After that,I decided to proceed with the rest of my day.
I had only a few things planned for today.I went out to pick up a few more job applications.After that,I headed for a local supermarket to pick up a couple loaves of whole wheat bread and chicken breasts.After paying for those things,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I put the groceries away in their proper places and I started to prepare my evening meal.
After eating,I decided to do some more personal PC work and make a few phone calls.I then prepared for my evening retirement.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.I also got a phone call from one of the places that I applied to and I have an interview appointment for Tuesday the 20th of this month at 3:00pm.
While my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward,I am still in my daily struggles against BPD/Schizophrenia and SSA,which is the most difficult of the two for me.Today,I gave into the temptation to manipulate my genitals to sexual images of men clouding in my mind upon arising.Fortunately,I managed to stop myself before it went too far and I immediately went to my Heavenly Father in prayer and asked for forgiveness in the name of his son Jesus Christ.I prayed real hard and left nothing out as I bared all in my prayer and when I was finished,I felt much better and I also knew and truly believed that I was forgiven.I am still working on getting tough with myself in this regard.I am still working on trying to regularly go to my Heavenly Father in prayer and ask for the strength to help me fight and resist these terrible temptations when they come around.I am serious about wanting to heal.I am also serious about wanting to overcome.I need to really work on going to my Heavenly Father in prayer and ask him to help me regularly.I have to stop giving into these terrible temptations.I don't want to disappoint my Heavenly Father by giving into these terrible things.I don't want to give Satan and his minions the satisfaction that they want,which is to sin against my Heavenly Father and disobey his perfect law in regards to sexuality.Fellow blog followers and readers,please continue to keep me in your prayers.I also would appreciate some positive verbal support in the comments section.My blog gets many visitors and/or curiosity seekers,but comments are rarely left by anyone.I need both your prayerful and positive verbal support.They both help keep me going.They also keep both my determination to overcome and motivation to heal strong.They also reassure and reaffirm me that I am not alone in this particular fight and struggle.Please continue keeping me in your prayers and also,please leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.Thanks in advance to all of you for your continued prayers and your continued positive verbal support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,with the exception of church as usual,I have nothing else planned.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes and plans for the day ahead.FJ
Saturday, May 10, 2014
Friday, May 09, 2014
Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the early morning and I had my usual 2 cups of coffee.After my coffee,I showered and when I was done with that,I got dressed and had my usual quick breakfast.After breakfast,I quickly did my personal PC work.After that was done,I called ahead for a haircut at the newly opened place where I get my hair done.After my hair was done,I went to the local Super Wal-Mart to pick up a few things that I needed.After paying for those things,I headed for home.
On the way home,I stopped at a gas station to get some gas.After that,I stopped at a local store to pick up a small bag of ranch flavored tortilla chips.After paying for those,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I put the stuff that I bought away and I relaxed while doing some more personal PC work.
After eating,I was hoping to head out to my usual Friday night Celebrate Recovery group,but a severe thunderstorm warning kept me home and I didn't want to take any chances,so I chose to stay home to be on the safe side.which went as wonderfully as expected as the sharing was enormous and overwhelming.I simply did some work at home and later on,I prepared for my evening retirement.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
While my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward,I am still in my daily struggles against BPD/Schizophrenia and SSA,which is the most difficult of the two for me.Today,upon arising,I was again tempted overwhelmingly to indulge in fantasies and lusting after other men and also,to manipulate my genitals to the sexual images of men that were clouding my mind.My mind wasn't fully awake at that point and again,the temptations to indulge were overwhelming.I immediately went to my Heavenly Father in prayer and asked for strength to help me fight and resist these urges in the name of his son Jesus Christ.I prayed real hard for that strength as the temptations today were very overwhelming.I prayed and I prayed until the desires were nil.It took a while,but when I finished praying,I felt better and much stronger as I knew and believed that my Heavenly Father gave me what I asked for.I went through the rest of the day just doing what I had to do and I had no more problems with temptations.I stayed busy just doing what I had to and it kept my mind off of everything sexual with other men and that was good.Though I escaped today unscathed,there is still tomorrow and the days after tomorrow.Satan and his minions can strike at any time and I need to stay on guard and be watchful as when they strike,I need to go to my Heavenly Father in prayer to ask for strength to help me fight and resist in the name of his son Jesus Christ.Fellow blog followers and readers,I am again asking that you continue to keep me in your prayers and also,please don't forget to leave me an encouraging word or two in the comments section.I need both prayerful and positive verbal support.The positive verbal support reassures and reaffirms me that I am not alone in this particular fight and struggle.They also help keep me going.They also help keep my determination to overcome and motivation to heal strong.As I have said before and I will say it again,my blog gets many visitors and/or curiosity seekers,but comments are rarely left in the comments section and I really do need some positive verbal support really desperately in the same way that I need the prayerful support.Thanks in advance to all of you for your continued prayerful and positive verbal support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for the weekend,with the exception of church as usual,I have nothing else planned.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes and plans for the weekend ahead.FJ
Today,I woke up in the early morning and I had my usual 2 cups of coffee.After my coffee,I showered and when I was done with that,I got dressed and had my usual quick breakfast.After breakfast,I quickly did my personal PC work.After that was done,I called ahead for a haircut at the newly opened place where I get my hair done.After my hair was done,I went to the local Super Wal-Mart to pick up a few things that I needed.After paying for those things,I headed for home.
On the way home,I stopped at a gas station to get some gas.After that,I stopped at a local store to pick up a small bag of ranch flavored tortilla chips.After paying for those,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I put the stuff that I bought away and I relaxed while doing some more personal PC work.
After eating,I was hoping to head out to my usual Friday night Celebrate Recovery group,but a severe thunderstorm warning kept me home and I didn't want to take any chances,so I chose to stay home to be on the safe side.which went as wonderfully as expected as the sharing was enormous and overwhelming.I simply did some work at home and later on,I prepared for my evening retirement.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
While my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward,I am still in my daily struggles against BPD/Schizophrenia and SSA,which is the most difficult of the two for me.Today,upon arising,I was again tempted overwhelmingly to indulge in fantasies and lusting after other men and also,to manipulate my genitals to the sexual images of men that were clouding my mind.My mind wasn't fully awake at that point and again,the temptations to indulge were overwhelming.I immediately went to my Heavenly Father in prayer and asked for strength to help me fight and resist these urges in the name of his son Jesus Christ.I prayed real hard for that strength as the temptations today were very overwhelming.I prayed and I prayed until the desires were nil.It took a while,but when I finished praying,I felt better and much stronger as I knew and believed that my Heavenly Father gave me what I asked for.I went through the rest of the day just doing what I had to do and I had no more problems with temptations.I stayed busy just doing what I had to and it kept my mind off of everything sexual with other men and that was good.Though I escaped today unscathed,there is still tomorrow and the days after tomorrow.Satan and his minions can strike at any time and I need to stay on guard and be watchful as when they strike,I need to go to my Heavenly Father in prayer to ask for strength to help me fight and resist in the name of his son Jesus Christ.Fellow blog followers and readers,I am again asking that you continue to keep me in your prayers and also,please don't forget to leave me an encouraging word or two in the comments section.I need both prayerful and positive verbal support.The positive verbal support reassures and reaffirms me that I am not alone in this particular fight and struggle.They also help keep me going.They also help keep my determination to overcome and motivation to heal strong.As I have said before and I will say it again,my blog gets many visitors and/or curiosity seekers,but comments are rarely left in the comments section and I really do need some positive verbal support really desperately in the same way that I need the prayerful support.Thanks in advance to all of you for your continued prayerful and positive verbal support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for the weekend,with the exception of church as usual,I have nothing else planned.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes and plans for the weekend ahead.FJ
Thursday, May 08, 2014
Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a very good day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I had 2 cups of coffee.After my coffee,I showered quickly and when I was finished with that,I had no time to eat,so I got dressed in dress clothes and I headed for the job placement agency with job applications in hand.
My job placement counselor/coach and I filled them out within 45 minutes.After we were done,I headed out to drop them off at the places where I picked them up,with the exception of two,which I held onto until the late afternoon.After that,I headed straight home and when I got there,I had my usual quick breakfast a little late.I did my personal PC work afterwards and I had a few PB & J sandwiches for lunch.After that,I headed back out to do some shopping at the local Super Wal-Mart and when that was done,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I put the groceries away and I got dressed up again in the dress clothes and I dropped off the last two applications.On the way to do that,I picked up another application.I headed for home after that.
On the way home,I stopped to see how a a friend of mine was doing.After spending a few minutes with him,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I changed into casual clothes and I did some more personal PC work.
After eating,I did some more personal PC work and when I was done with that,I relaxed while preparing for my evening retirement as tonight,my usual Thursday evening Holy Bible study group was cancelled,but will resume next week.Overall,a very good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
While my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward,I am still in my daily struggles against BPD/Schizophrenia and SSA,which is my most difficult of the two.Today,upon arising,I was tempted to manipulate my genitals to sexual images of men clouding my mind and also,I was tempted to fantasize and lust after them.The temptation was overwhelming and strong.I actually turned the temptations over to my Heavenly Father in prayer and I asked him for strength to help me fight and resist these terrible temptations.I prayed real hard and I kept praying until the temptations were reduced to nil.When I was finished,I felt stronger and I knew and believed that my Heavenly Father gave me what I asked for.I also thanked him for giving me that strength.For the rest of the day,I kept busy putting the job applications in and hoping that I will eventually be hired soon.I have been getting my name out there and hoping and praying for something to happen,but so far,nothing new has happened since mid last year.I am hoping that something happens soon.The task of handing in the job applications today took my mind off of sexual stuff and that was good.Nothing came into my mind as I was out and about today handing in the job applications.Though I escaped today unscathed,there is always tomorrow and the days after that.Satan and his minions can strike at any time with temptations.I need to continue to be on guard and watchful.Fellow blog followers,please continue praying for me as I am still going through a very difficult emotional time.I also need some positive verbal support in the comments section.I need both your prayerful and positive verbal support each and every day.Please leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section and continue to keep me in your prayers.Your prayers and positive verbal support help keep me going.They also help keep both my determination to overcome and motivation to heal strong.My blog gets many visitors and/or curiosity seekers,but they rarely leave any comments in the comments section.Please continue to keep me in your prayers and also,please don't forget to leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.Thanks in advance to all of you for your prayers and your continued positive verbal support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,with the exception of my evening Celebrate Recovery group,I haven't any plans made.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes and plans for the day ahead.FJ
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I had 2 cups of coffee.After my coffee,I showered quickly and when I was finished with that,I had no time to eat,so I got dressed in dress clothes and I headed for the job placement agency with job applications in hand.
My job placement counselor/coach and I filled them out within 45 minutes.After we were done,I headed out to drop them off at the places where I picked them up,with the exception of two,which I held onto until the late afternoon.After that,I headed straight home and when I got there,I had my usual quick breakfast a little late.I did my personal PC work afterwards and I had a few PB & J sandwiches for lunch.After that,I headed back out to do some shopping at the local Super Wal-Mart and when that was done,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I put the groceries away and I got dressed up again in the dress clothes and I dropped off the last two applications.On the way to do that,I picked up another application.I headed for home after that.
On the way home,I stopped to see how a a friend of mine was doing.After spending a few minutes with him,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I changed into casual clothes and I did some more personal PC work.
After eating,I did some more personal PC work and when I was done with that,I relaxed while preparing for my evening retirement as tonight,my usual Thursday evening Holy Bible study group was cancelled,but will resume next week.Overall,a very good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
While my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward,I am still in my daily struggles against BPD/Schizophrenia and SSA,which is my most difficult of the two.Today,upon arising,I was tempted to manipulate my genitals to sexual images of men clouding my mind and also,I was tempted to fantasize and lust after them.The temptation was overwhelming and strong.I actually turned the temptations over to my Heavenly Father in prayer and I asked him for strength to help me fight and resist these terrible temptations.I prayed real hard and I kept praying until the temptations were reduced to nil.When I was finished,I felt stronger and I knew and believed that my Heavenly Father gave me what I asked for.I also thanked him for giving me that strength.For the rest of the day,I kept busy putting the job applications in and hoping that I will eventually be hired soon.I have been getting my name out there and hoping and praying for something to happen,but so far,nothing new has happened since mid last year.I am hoping that something happens soon.The task of handing in the job applications today took my mind off of sexual stuff and that was good.Nothing came into my mind as I was out and about today handing in the job applications.Though I escaped today unscathed,there is always tomorrow and the days after that.Satan and his minions can strike at any time with temptations.I need to continue to be on guard and watchful.Fellow blog followers,please continue praying for me as I am still going through a very difficult emotional time.I also need some positive verbal support in the comments section.I need both your prayerful and positive verbal support each and every day.Please leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section and continue to keep me in your prayers.Your prayers and positive verbal support help keep me going.They also help keep both my determination to overcome and motivation to heal strong.My blog gets many visitors and/or curiosity seekers,but they rarely leave any comments in the comments section.Please continue to keep me in your prayers and also,please don't forget to leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.Thanks in advance to all of you for your prayers and your continued positive verbal support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,with the exception of my evening Celebrate Recovery group,I haven't any plans made.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes and plans for the day ahead.FJ
Wednesday, May 07, 2014
Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I had 2 cups of coffee.After that,I showered quickly and when I was finished,I got dressed and had my usual quick breakfast.After breakfast,I quickly did my personal PC work and when I was finished with that,I had a light lunch.After eating that,I headed out to do some stuff that I had to do.
I picked up a couple more job applications and after that,I stopped at a local supermarket to pick up a few things.After paying for those things,I stopped at the local Super Wal-Mart,but chose not to get anything there today.After leaving there,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I put the stuff that I bought away and I had myself a light dinner and when I was finished eating,I did some more personal PC work.I then prepared for my early retirement.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
While my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward,I am still in my daily struggles against BPD/Schizophrenia and SSA,which is the most difficult of the two for me.Today,I managed to go to my Heavenly Father in prayer and ask for strength to help me fight and resist the temptations to sin in the name of his son Jesus Christ.I was tempted with the usual temptations to manipulate my genitals to sexual images of men that were clouding my mind and I also had the temptation to fantasize and lust after them.I prayed real hard for that strength as I really wanted to fight and resist these terrible,but overwhelming,urges.When I was finished,I felt better and stronger and I went through the rest of the day unscathed.I simply went about my day and stayed busy so I could keep my mind on other things and throughout the day,I didn't have any problems with any temptations.I stayed busy and I kept at what I had to do and it kept my mind off of anything sexual.It is wonderful that I have a loving Heavenly Father and loving savior,his only begotten son Jesus Christ,to be there for me to give me strength to fight and resist all sorts of terrible temptations.While I did escape today unscathed,there is always tomorrow and the days after that.I still need to stay on guard and be watchful as Satan and his minions can strike at any time.I need to make it a habit of going to my Heavenly Father in prayer and ask for the strength to help me fight and resist these temptations when they come around.Fellow blog followers and readers,please continue to keep me in your prayers and also,please leave me some positive verbal encouragement in the comments section.I need both prayerful and positive verbal support from all of you.My blog gets many visitors and/or curiosity seekers,but comments are rarely left.I need positive verbal support in the comments section alongside your prayerful support.They both help keep me going.They also help keep both my determination to overcome and motivation to heal strong.They also both reassure and reaffirm me that I am not alone in this particular fight and struggle.Thanks in advance to all of you for your continued prayers and positive verbal support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,with the exception of meeting with my job placement counselor/coach to help me fill out those applications that I picked up over the last 2 days,I have nothing else planned.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes and plans for the day ahead.FJ
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I had 2 cups of coffee.After that,I showered quickly and when I was finished,I got dressed and had my usual quick breakfast.After breakfast,I quickly did my personal PC work and when I was finished with that,I had a light lunch.After eating that,I headed out to do some stuff that I had to do.
I picked up a couple more job applications and after that,I stopped at a local supermarket to pick up a few things.After paying for those things,I stopped at the local Super Wal-Mart,but chose not to get anything there today.After leaving there,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I put the stuff that I bought away and I had myself a light dinner and when I was finished eating,I did some more personal PC work.I then prepared for my early retirement.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
While my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward,I am still in my daily struggles against BPD/Schizophrenia and SSA,which is the most difficult of the two for me.Today,I managed to go to my Heavenly Father in prayer and ask for strength to help me fight and resist the temptations to sin in the name of his son Jesus Christ.I was tempted with the usual temptations to manipulate my genitals to sexual images of men that were clouding my mind and I also had the temptation to fantasize and lust after them.I prayed real hard for that strength as I really wanted to fight and resist these terrible,but overwhelming,urges.When I was finished,I felt better and stronger and I went through the rest of the day unscathed.I simply went about my day and stayed busy so I could keep my mind on other things and throughout the day,I didn't have any problems with any temptations.I stayed busy and I kept at what I had to do and it kept my mind off of anything sexual.It is wonderful that I have a loving Heavenly Father and loving savior,his only begotten son Jesus Christ,to be there for me to give me strength to fight and resist all sorts of terrible temptations.While I did escape today unscathed,there is always tomorrow and the days after that.I still need to stay on guard and be watchful as Satan and his minions can strike at any time.I need to make it a habit of going to my Heavenly Father in prayer and ask for the strength to help me fight and resist these temptations when they come around.Fellow blog followers and readers,please continue to keep me in your prayers and also,please leave me some positive verbal encouragement in the comments section.I need both prayerful and positive verbal support from all of you.My blog gets many visitors and/or curiosity seekers,but comments are rarely left.I need positive verbal support in the comments section alongside your prayerful support.They both help keep me going.They also help keep both my determination to overcome and motivation to heal strong.They also both reassure and reaffirm me that I am not alone in this particular fight and struggle.Thanks in advance to all of you for your continued prayers and positive verbal support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,with the exception of meeting with my job placement counselor/coach to help me fill out those applications that I picked up over the last 2 days,I have nothing else planned.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes and plans for the day ahead.FJ
Tuesday, May 06, 2014
Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I had 2 cups of coffee.After my coffee,I showered quickly and when I was finished,I got dressed and had my usual quick breakfast.I had a rough time waking up as I woke up with terrible leg cramp pain.I also had a tough time walking around the house as I felt pain every time that I walked.
I did my personal PC work quickly and when that was done,I decided to take a drive out to a Salvation Army thrift store in the next county.
On the way there,I stopped at a gas station to get some gas.After that,I stopped by a friend's pizzeria to see if he was in,which he wasn't and after having a slice of pizza and a bottle of water,I headed back out and stopped at a nearby Super Wal-Mart and picked up a can of soup and a small hero sandwich for dinner.I also picked up a couple of leg cramp homeopathic medication.After paying for these things,I headed to the thrift store and when I got there,I looked through the CD's to see if there were any Christian music CD's and there were quite a few that I bought.After paying for them,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I prepared my evening meal and while I was doing that,I also washed my breakfast dishes.When my soup was done,I put some mustard on my sandwich and I ate.After I was finished,I did more personal PC work.I also started to prepare for my evening retirement.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
While my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward,I am still in my daily struggles against BPD/Schizophrenia and SSA,which is my most difficult of the two for me.Today,I gave into temptation twice during the morning after arising.On both occurrences,I gave into the temptation to manipulate my genitals to sexual images of men clouding my mind causing me to fantasize and lust after the images of men that were clouding my mind.I felt miserable on both of these occurrences and I asked my Heavenly Father to forgive me in the name of his son Jesus Christ for my giving into these terrible temptations and I also accepted full and total responsibility for my falling into sin.On the second prayer of forgiveness,I had to really pour out my soul and asked my Heavenly Father to not only forgive me but to also help me.I pleaded for him to help me because I don't want to keep giving into the same old things and ask to be forgiven constantly.I have to show my Heavenly Father that I am serious about wanting to heal and wanting to overcome SSA.I really am and I need to really start to get tough with myself.I have to avoid falling into the trap of habitually sinning and going to my Heavenly Father for forgiveness.I have to make it a habit of going to my Heavenly Father in prayer and asking for strength to help me fight and resist these terrible temptation.I have to make a habit of that.I can't be enslaved to the unnatural desires that I have nor be enslaved to my gender identity and worship my Heavenly Father.It has to be one thing or the other.Fellow blog followers and readers,I really need your prayers right now.Please continue to pray for me and also,please don't forget to leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.I need both your prayerful and positive verbal support right now as I am going through a very difficult emotional time right now.I need your support desperately.Please continue to keep me in your prayers and please leave me positive verbal support in the comments section.Please support me.I need your support right now.Your support helps keep me going.It also reassures and reaffirms me that I am not alone in this particular fight and struggle.It also help keep both my determination and motivation strong.Thanks in advance to all of you for your continued prayers and your continued positive verbal support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,I haven't made any plans.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes for the day ahead.FJ
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I had 2 cups of coffee.After my coffee,I showered quickly and when I was finished,I got dressed and had my usual quick breakfast.I had a rough time waking up as I woke up with terrible leg cramp pain.I also had a tough time walking around the house as I felt pain every time that I walked.
I did my personal PC work quickly and when that was done,I decided to take a drive out to a Salvation Army thrift store in the next county.
On the way there,I stopped at a gas station to get some gas.After that,I stopped by a friend's pizzeria to see if he was in,which he wasn't and after having a slice of pizza and a bottle of water,I headed back out and stopped at a nearby Super Wal-Mart and picked up a can of soup and a small hero sandwich for dinner.I also picked up a couple of leg cramp homeopathic medication.After paying for these things,I headed to the thrift store and when I got there,I looked through the CD's to see if there were any Christian music CD's and there were quite a few that I bought.After paying for them,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I prepared my evening meal and while I was doing that,I also washed my breakfast dishes.When my soup was done,I put some mustard on my sandwich and I ate.After I was finished,I did more personal PC work.I also started to prepare for my evening retirement.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
While my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward,I am still in my daily struggles against BPD/Schizophrenia and SSA,which is my most difficult of the two for me.Today,I gave into temptation twice during the morning after arising.On both occurrences,I gave into the temptation to manipulate my genitals to sexual images of men clouding my mind causing me to fantasize and lust after the images of men that were clouding my mind.I felt miserable on both of these occurrences and I asked my Heavenly Father to forgive me in the name of his son Jesus Christ for my giving into these terrible temptations and I also accepted full and total responsibility for my falling into sin.On the second prayer of forgiveness,I had to really pour out my soul and asked my Heavenly Father to not only forgive me but to also help me.I pleaded for him to help me because I don't want to keep giving into the same old things and ask to be forgiven constantly.I have to show my Heavenly Father that I am serious about wanting to heal and wanting to overcome SSA.I really am and I need to really start to get tough with myself.I have to avoid falling into the trap of habitually sinning and going to my Heavenly Father for forgiveness.I have to make it a habit of going to my Heavenly Father in prayer and asking for strength to help me fight and resist these terrible temptation.I have to make a habit of that.I can't be enslaved to the unnatural desires that I have nor be enslaved to my gender identity and worship my Heavenly Father.It has to be one thing or the other.Fellow blog followers and readers,I really need your prayers right now.Please continue to pray for me and also,please don't forget to leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.I need both your prayerful and positive verbal support right now as I am going through a very difficult emotional time right now.I need your support desperately.Please continue to keep me in your prayers and please leave me positive verbal support in the comments section.Please support me.I need your support right now.Your support helps keep me going.It also reassures and reaffirms me that I am not alone in this particular fight and struggle.It also help keep both my determination and motivation strong.Thanks in advance to all of you for your continued prayers and your continued positive verbal support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,I haven't made any plans.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes for the day ahead.FJ
Monday, May 05, 2014
Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I had 2 cups of coffee.After that,I showered quickly and after my shower,I had my usual quick breakfast.After breakfast,I quickly did my personal PC work and had a light lunch afterwards.After that,I headed out to do some important things that I needed to get done.
I first went to the post office to have a money order made so I could pay my car insurance,which I did.I also managed to pick up a few more job applications while doing this and after that,I also did a little bit of shopping at the local Super Wal-Mart.After that was done,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I put the stuff that I bought away and I did some more personal PC work.
After eating,I decided to pop a DVD into the DVD player and relax.After it was over,I did some more personal PC work.I then prepared for my evening retirement.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
While my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward,I am still in my daily struggles against BPD/Schizophrenia and SSA,which is the most difficult for me.This morning,upon arising,I gave into temptation again by manipulating my genitals to sexual images of men clouding my mind,and that gave way to fantasizing and lusting after other men and when the moment of orgasm came,I masturbated the rest of the way.I really felt miserable after this as I felt that I had failed my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ by my fall.After I washed my hands,I immediately asked my Heavenly Father to forgive and to have mercy on me in the name of his son Jesus Christ.I prayed real hard and I left nothing out.I confessed everything to him and when I was finished,I felt a lot better as knew and truly believed that I was forgiven.I went on with the rest of the day with no problems.Still,I do feel miserable whenever I fall short.I feel that I let my Heavenly Father down by falling into sin,though I know that I am as imperfect as any other human being living in the world,and I know that I will fall short form time to time.Also still,I don't want to fall back into the trap of habitually sinning against my Heavenly Father and going to him to confess and asking to be forgiven by him.I need to figure out what I need to do to avoid falling into that particular trap.I also need to figure out why I am doing that right now.Fellow blog followers and readers,please continue to keep me in your prayers.I also would appreciate it if you would also leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.My blog gets many visitors and curiosity seekers,but comments of any sort are rarely left.Please leave me an encouraging comment in the comments section as I really need some positive verbal support right now.Your prayers and your positive verbal support both help keep me going in this particular fight and struggle.They also both reassure and reaffirm me that I am not alone in this particular fight and struggle.Please continue to keep me in your prayers and also,please don't be shy and leave me an encouraging word or two or more in the comments section.Thanks in advance to all of you for your continued prayerful and positive verbal support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,I have nothing planned.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes for the day ahead.FJ
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I had 2 cups of coffee.After that,I showered quickly and after my shower,I had my usual quick breakfast.After breakfast,I quickly did my personal PC work and had a light lunch afterwards.After that,I headed out to do some important things that I needed to get done.
I first went to the post office to have a money order made so I could pay my car insurance,which I did.I also managed to pick up a few more job applications while doing this and after that,I also did a little bit of shopping at the local Super Wal-Mart.After that was done,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I put the stuff that I bought away and I did some more personal PC work.
After eating,I decided to pop a DVD into the DVD player and relax.After it was over,I did some more personal PC work.I then prepared for my evening retirement.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
While my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward,I am still in my daily struggles against BPD/Schizophrenia and SSA,which is the most difficult for me.This morning,upon arising,I gave into temptation again by manipulating my genitals to sexual images of men clouding my mind,and that gave way to fantasizing and lusting after other men and when the moment of orgasm came,I masturbated the rest of the way.I really felt miserable after this as I felt that I had failed my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ by my fall.After I washed my hands,I immediately asked my Heavenly Father to forgive and to have mercy on me in the name of his son Jesus Christ.I prayed real hard and I left nothing out.I confessed everything to him and when I was finished,I felt a lot better as knew and truly believed that I was forgiven.I went on with the rest of the day with no problems.Still,I do feel miserable whenever I fall short.I feel that I let my Heavenly Father down by falling into sin,though I know that I am as imperfect as any other human being living in the world,and I know that I will fall short form time to time.Also still,I don't want to fall back into the trap of habitually sinning against my Heavenly Father and going to him to confess and asking to be forgiven by him.I need to figure out what I need to do to avoid falling into that particular trap.I also need to figure out why I am doing that right now.Fellow blog followers and readers,please continue to keep me in your prayers.I also would appreciate it if you would also leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.My blog gets many visitors and curiosity seekers,but comments of any sort are rarely left.Please leave me an encouraging comment in the comments section as I really need some positive verbal support right now.Your prayers and your positive verbal support both help keep me going in this particular fight and struggle.They also both reassure and reaffirm me that I am not alone in this particular fight and struggle.Please continue to keep me in your prayers and also,please don't be shy and leave me an encouraging word or two or more in the comments section.Thanks in advance to all of you for your continued prayerful and positive verbal support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,I have nothing planned.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes for the day ahead.FJ
Sunday, May 04, 2014
Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a wonderful and eventful day today.
Today,I woke up in the early morning and had 3 cups of coffee as I was still feeling really sleepy when I got up out of bed.After my coffee,I showered quickly and when I was finished,I had my usual quick breakfast.After breakfast,I got dressed up in a suit and I headed for church for both the morning's Holy Bible study class and the worship service afterwards.
Both the class and the worship service were wonderful.After some wonderful fellowship with my fellow worshipers,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I got out of my suit and into my casual clothes.I had a light lunch and when I was finished with it,I did my personal PC work.After that was done,I went out for a little drive somewhere,but the place I went to was closed.I headed straight home after that.
When I got home,I did some more personal PC work and I then prepared my evening meal.
After eating,I did a little bit more personal PC work and after that was done,I decided to watch a classic TV episode on one of my DVD sets.I then prepared for my evening retirement.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
While my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward,I am still in my daily struggles against BPD/Schizophrenia and SSA,with the latter being the most difficult for me.Early this morning,I gave into temptation by manipulating my genitals when sexual images of men clouded my mind and I started fantasizing and lusting after them.I managed to stop myself before it went too far and I immediately asked my Heavenly Father for forgiveness in the name of his son Jesus Christ and I left nothing out.I accepted full and total responsibility for my falling into sin as I asked for the forgiveness that my Heavenly Father provides for those who worship him that are repentant.After I was finished praying,I felt better and I truly knew and believed that I was forgiven.I went through the rest of the day without having any problems with immoral sexual images of men and I also had no temptation to manipulate my genitals.I still need to stay on guard and be watchful as Satan and his minions can strike when least expected.I still have to work on regularly asking my Heavenly Father for strength to help me fight and resist these terrible temptations.I need to really go to my Heavenly Father and ask for this strength regularly.I don't want to fall back into the routine of habitually sinning and asking to be forgiven by my Heavenly Father, as I feel that I would be abusing his divine gift of forgiveness.I don't want to do that.I have to show my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ that I truly mean it when I keep saying that I want to overcome SSA and also heal from the unnatural sexual desires that I have that are connected with this terrible SSA.Fellow blog followers and readers,please continue to keep me in your prayers and also,please leave me an encouraging word or two in the comments section.I need both prayers and positive verbal support.They both help out in a lot of ways.Prayers and positive verbal encouragement have powers beyond everything.They both help keep me going.They also help keep both my determination and motivation strong.They also reassure and reaffirm me that I am not alone in this particular struggle.Thanks in advance to all of you for your continued prayers and your continued positive verbal support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,I have no plans.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes for the day ahead.FJ.
Today,I woke up in the early morning and had 3 cups of coffee as I was still feeling really sleepy when I got up out of bed.After my coffee,I showered quickly and when I was finished,I had my usual quick breakfast.After breakfast,I got dressed up in a suit and I headed for church for both the morning's Holy Bible study class and the worship service afterwards.
Both the class and the worship service were wonderful.After some wonderful fellowship with my fellow worshipers,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I got out of my suit and into my casual clothes.I had a light lunch and when I was finished with it,I did my personal PC work.After that was done,I went out for a little drive somewhere,but the place I went to was closed.I headed straight home after that.
When I got home,I did some more personal PC work and I then prepared my evening meal.
After eating,I did a little bit more personal PC work and after that was done,I decided to watch a classic TV episode on one of my DVD sets.I then prepared for my evening retirement.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
While my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward,I am still in my daily struggles against BPD/Schizophrenia and SSA,with the latter being the most difficult for me.Early this morning,I gave into temptation by manipulating my genitals when sexual images of men clouded my mind and I started fantasizing and lusting after them.I managed to stop myself before it went too far and I immediately asked my Heavenly Father for forgiveness in the name of his son Jesus Christ and I left nothing out.I accepted full and total responsibility for my falling into sin as I asked for the forgiveness that my Heavenly Father provides for those who worship him that are repentant.After I was finished praying,I felt better and I truly knew and believed that I was forgiven.I went through the rest of the day without having any problems with immoral sexual images of men and I also had no temptation to manipulate my genitals.I still need to stay on guard and be watchful as Satan and his minions can strike when least expected.I still have to work on regularly asking my Heavenly Father for strength to help me fight and resist these terrible temptations.I need to really go to my Heavenly Father and ask for this strength regularly.I don't want to fall back into the routine of habitually sinning and asking to be forgiven by my Heavenly Father, as I feel that I would be abusing his divine gift of forgiveness.I don't want to do that.I have to show my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ that I truly mean it when I keep saying that I want to overcome SSA and also heal from the unnatural sexual desires that I have that are connected with this terrible SSA.Fellow blog followers and readers,please continue to keep me in your prayers and also,please leave me an encouraging word or two in the comments section.I need both prayers and positive verbal support.They both help out in a lot of ways.Prayers and positive verbal encouragement have powers beyond everything.They both help keep me going.They also help keep both my determination and motivation strong.They also reassure and reaffirm me that I am not alone in this particular struggle.Thanks in advance to all of you for your continued prayers and your continued positive verbal support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,I have no plans.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes for the day ahead.FJ.
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