Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I had 2 cups of coffee.After that,I showered quickly and after my shower,I had my usual quick breakfast.After breakfast,I quickly did my personal PC work and had a light lunch afterwards.After that,I headed out to do some important things that I needed to get done.
I first went to the post office to have a money order made so I could pay my car insurance,which I did.I also managed to pick up a few more job applications while doing this and after that,I also did a little bit of shopping at the local Super Wal-Mart.After that was done,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I put the stuff that I bought away and I did some more personal PC work.
After eating,I decided to pop a DVD into the DVD player and relax.After it was over,I did some more personal PC work.I then prepared for my evening retirement.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
While my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward,I am still in my daily struggles against BPD/Schizophrenia and SSA,which is the most difficult for me.This morning,upon arising,I gave into temptation again by manipulating my genitals to sexual images of men clouding my mind,and that gave way to fantasizing and lusting after other men and when the moment of orgasm came,I masturbated the rest of the way.I really felt miserable after this as I felt that I had failed my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ by my fall.After I washed my hands,I immediately asked my Heavenly Father to forgive and to have mercy on me in the name of his son Jesus Christ.I prayed real hard and I left nothing out.I confessed everything to him and when I was finished,I felt a lot better as knew and truly believed that I was forgiven.I went on with the rest of the day with no problems.Still,I do feel miserable whenever I fall short.I feel that I let my Heavenly Father down by falling into sin,though I know that I am as imperfect as any other human being living in the world,and I know that I will fall short form time to time.Also still,I don't want to fall back into the trap of habitually sinning against my Heavenly Father and going to him to confess and asking to be forgiven by him.I need to figure out what I need to do to avoid falling into that particular trap.I also need to figure out why I am doing that right now.Fellow blog followers and readers,please continue to keep me in your prayers.I also would appreciate it if you would also leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.My blog gets many visitors and curiosity seekers,but comments of any sort are rarely left.Please leave me an encouraging comment in the comments section as I really need some positive verbal support right now.Your prayers and your positive verbal support both help keep me going in this particular fight and struggle.They also both reassure and reaffirm me that I am not alone in this particular fight and struggle.Please continue to keep me in your prayers and also,please don't be shy and leave me an encouraging word or two or more in the comments section.Thanks in advance to all of you for your continued prayerful and positive verbal support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,I have nothing planned.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes for the day ahead.FJ