Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I had my usual 2 cups of coffee.After that,I showered and when I was finished,I had my usual quick breakfast.After breakfast,I did my personal PC work and I relaxed for much of the day and did a little bit of cleaning up here and there.After much of that,I got dressed and headed over to my sister's house for a birthday party where one of my family members was celebrating.
The party was wonderful.I had a pretty good time with my family and celebrating.After it was over,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I did some more personal PC work and I started to prepare for my evening retirement.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
While my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward,I am still in my daily struggles against BPD/Schizophrenia and SSA,which is the most difficult of the two for me.Today,I fell into sin by giving into temptation to fantasize and lust after other when sexual images of men clouded my mind and I also manipulated my genitals to these images and when I was at the point of orgasm,I masturbated the rest of the way.I really felt miserable and ashamed of myself for this and I immediately went to my Heavenly Father in prayer and asked him for forgiveness in the name of his son Jesus Christ.I prayed hard and I left nothing out.I also accepted full and total responsibility for my fall into sin and asked for forgiveness.I prayed real hard and when I was finished,I felt better as I believed that I was forgiven and that the slate was wiped clean.I really felt terrible after this fall.I really want to heal from and overcome this terrible SSA.I am having a very difficult time as it is trying to do so.With things happening in the news with certain churches allowing "Gay" marriages and couplings and others ordaining "Gay" bishops and the anger and sadness that I feel as a result if these things happening.All of these things actually contributed to my fall into sin and it also depressed me.I am struggling with SSA and I want to do what is right in the eyes of my Heavenly Father,but these things happening is really making it difficult for me to live.The world around is actually becoming secular in it's approach and those so called "Christian Churches" are just going with the flow rather than accept the truth and do what is right in the eyes of the sovereign Lord and creator of the world and the universe,our Heavenly Father.Our culture is getting even more warped by the day and it's disgusting.Fellow blog followers and readers,I am again appealing to y'all to please keep me in your prayers.I also ask that y'all leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.I need both of these supports right now and also,every day after today.Please continue praying for me.I also ask that you please leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.I really need your support right now as I am going through a very difficult emotional time right now.I need to continue fighting this terrible SSA and your support,both by prayers and verbal encouragement,really matters to me.They both help keep me going.They also help me to stay the course and make me even more determined and motivated to continue on and continue to hope for healing and affirmation.Thanks in advance to all of you for your continued prayers and continued positive verbal support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,with the exception of church as usual in the morning,I have nothing else planned.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes and plans for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I had my usual 2 cups of coffee.After my coffee,I checked my e-mail in all of the sites that I have it and I reduced some of it.After that,I showered quickly and when I was finished,I had my usual quick breakfast.After breakfast,I did my personal PC work and I got dressed to proceed with the rest of the day.
I went out to run an errand.I first went to a prospective employment place,but they advised me to go to a government jobs website and look up jobs available on there and after I left,I stopped at a local Dollar Tree store to pick up a few things and I headed straight home afterwards.
When I got home,I did some more personal PC work and as the night started coming,I started to prepare for my evening retirement.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
While my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward,I am still in my daily struggles against BPD/Schizophrenia and SSA,which is the most difficult of the two for me.Though it is,I must say that I didn't have any troubles with temptation today.I went through the day and I wasn't tempted in any way,shape or form.I went through the day and did what I had to do,which took my mind off of anything sexual.Though I did escape today unscathed,there is always tomorrow and the days after tomorrow.I have to continue to stay on guard and be watchful.Satan and his minions can strike at any time.I have to remember to always be on guard and watch every move I make as Satan and his minions can strike me with temptations when least expected.Fellow blog followers and readers,I still need prayerful and positive verbal support even though today was good.I need both your prayers and I still need positive verbal support in the comments section.I still need all the support that I can get.I need both prayers and encouragement.Your support helps keep me going.Your support also helps reaffirm and reassure me that I am not alone in this particular struggle.Your support also helps keep me strong in both my determination to overcome and motivation to heal.Please continue to keep me in your prayers.I also ask that you please leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.Thanks in advance to all of you for your continued prayers and positive verbal support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,with the exception of going to a birthday party,I have nothing else planned.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes and plans for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the early morning and I had my usual 2 cups of coffee.After that,I showered quickly and when I was finished with that,I had my usual quick breakfast.When I was finished,I did my personal PC work and I got dressed to leave the house to run an errand and when the errand was finished,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I did some more personal PC work and later on,started to prepare my evening meal.
After eating,I headed over to my usual Thursday night study group,which went as wonderful as expected.After it was over,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I did a little bit more personal PC work and as it was getting late,I started to prepare for my evening retirement.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
While my rocky road to recovery continues to move forward,I am still in my daily struggles against BPD/Schizophrenia and SSA,which is the most difficult of the two for me.Today,I wasn't tempted to act out on the unnatural sexual desires that I have by any means,which includes fantasizing and lusting after other men nor by sexual images of men and I also wasn't tempted to watch porn either.It was great that this didn't happen and it made me feel a little bit better.Though I escaped today unscathed,there is always tomorrow and the days after tomorrow.I am not worried about tomorrow.It is just that Satan and his minions can strike at any time when least expected and I still need to stay on guard and be watchful for that.I don't want to give them what they want because they want to break my Heavenly Father's perfect law in regards to sexuality and I don't want to do that.They also want to make me think that there is no hope for me nor is there any way out for me,but I know that both of these things are lies.Fellow blog followers and readers,please continue to keep me in your prayers and also,please leave me some positive verbal encouragement in the comments.I need both prayerful and positive verbal support each and every day and also,desperately.Please pray for me as I am still going through a very difficult emotional time and also,I need all the positive verbal support that I can get.Your support in both of these areas helps keep me going.Your support in both of these areas also reaffirms and reassures me that I am not alone in this particular struggle.Please continue to keep me in your prayers and also,please don't forget to leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.Thanks in advance to all of you for your continued prayerful and positive verbal support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,I have made no plans.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I had my usual 2 cups of coffee.After that,I showered quickly and when I was finished,I had my usual quick breakfast.After breakfast,I did my personal PC work and when that was done,I decided to relax for a while and take it easy.Though I have my car back on the road,I chose to simply stay home and relax.I even rescheduled an appointment with my caseworker for next week.After browsing the internet for a while,I decided to prepare my evening meal.
After eating,I relaxed and popped a DVD into the DVD player and watched it.I also did some more personal PC work.I then decided to start preparing for evening retirement.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
While my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward,I am still in my daily struggles against BPD/Schizophrenia and SSA,which is the most difficult of the two for me and has been really bothersome to me as of late.The stress of the job search has been really getting to me and the temptations to act out by fantasies and lusting after other men as sexual images of men cloud my mind.This has really been difficult for me as of late.I seriously want to work and I seriously like to work.I have been putting applications in everywhere,but so far,no calls for an interview as my last interviews were almost a month ago.Today,as a result of the stress and strain of the job search and really not getting anywhere,I gave into temptation again as mentioned above and again,I managed to stop myself and I immediately went to my Heavenly Father.I asked him for forgiveness in the name of his son Jesus Christ.I prayed and I prayed.I left nothing out.I admitted everything to my Heavenly Father and I also accepted full and total responsibility for my falling into sin.When I was finished,I did feel much better as I knew and believed that I was forgiven.I really felt terrible because of my falls and I still want to heal and overcome this terrible SSA.I want to heal and I want to overcome. I am very serious about that.I don't want to go back to that sinful lifestyle that I have now abandoned as that lifestyle will only make me feel miserable and it won't give me what I truly want and need,which is affirmation of my gender identity and the feelings of authenticity that go with that affirmation.Fellow blog followers and readers,Please continue to keep me in your prayers.I also would appreciate that you would leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.I need both prayerful and positive verbal support desperately.I need to be reaffirmed and reassured that I am not alone in this particular struggle.Your support helps keep me going.It also helps keep me strong in terms of both my determination to overcome and motivation to want to heal.Please continue keeping me in your prayers and also,please don't be afraid to leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.Thanks in advance to all of you for your continued prayerful and positive verbal support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,I have made no plans.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning to my phone ringing,but I didn't get out of bed right away.When the phone rang a second time this morning,I slowly started to get out of bed and I immediately returned the phone calls and after that was done,I had my usual 2 cups of coffee and when I was finished with that,I decided to have my usual quick breakfast right away and when I was finished with that,I had to wait awhile before taking my shower and when I did and was finished,I immediately got dressed and I walked over to the garage to pick up my car as what was wrong with it wasn't that bad.After picking it up,I took a little drive,but didn't stop anywhere.I headed for home after that.
When I got home,I did my personal PC work and when it was late afternoon,I decided to prepare my evening meal.
After eating,I decided to watch a DVD that I popped into the DVD player and I relaxed while watching it.I also did a little bot more personal PC work and later on,I started preparing for my evening retirement.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
While my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward,I am still in my daily struggle against BPD/Schizophrenia and SSA,which is the most difficult for me.Today,after doing pretty good the last few days,I fell by giving into temptation to fantasize and lust after other men and I did manipulate my genitals to these images.I managed to stop myself before it went too far and I immediately went to my Heavenly Father in prayer and asked for forgiveness in the name of his son Jesus Christ.I prayed and I left nothing out.I also accepted full and total responsibility for my fall and when I was finished,I felt better as I truly knew and believed that I was forgiven and that the slate was wiped clean by my Heavenly Father.I went through the rest of the day with no problems,but I need to prevent falls from happening as I do have the power to prevent falls before they happen.I need to get to my Heavenly Father and ask for strength to help me fight and resist these terrible temptations when they come around.I am really serious about wanting to heal from and overcome this terrible SSA.I want to continue to be free and stay free.I don't want to give Satan and his minions what they want,which is break the laws that my Heavenly Father set forth in his sacred word,the Holy Bible,as his laws are perfect and flawless.Fellow blog followers,I am again asking that you continue to keep me in your prayers.I also ask that you leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.I need both prayerful and positive verbal support daily and often.I need to be reaffirmed and reassured that I am not alone in this particular struggle.Yes,I do.I need all the support that I can get.Please continue praying for me.I also ask that you please leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.Thanks in advance to all of you for your prayers and your continued positive verbal support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,I have no plans.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a very good day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I had my usual 2 cups of coffee.After that,I showered quickly and when I was finished,I had my usual quick breakfast.After breakfast,I started to do my personal PC work and was midway through it when I received a phone call.I answered it and it was a friend from my church and he wanted to take me to a place where he wanted to buy me a new suit and get my car towed to the garage.He came over about twenty minutes after I hung up and after the tow truck driver came,we headed out to a clothing store and he got me a really nice suit to where and it will be altered a little and done in a couple of weeks.After that,we had ourselves a light lunch and after that,he dropped me off at home and I did a little bit more personal PC work,but had to put it off when my niece came over to take me to a local Dollar Tree store so I could pick up a few things that I needed and I also went into a nearby supermarket to pick up a few more things.After paying for everything,my niece dropped me off at home and I put everything away.I finished my personal PC work and when that was finished,I decided to prepare my evening meal.
After eating a light meal,I decided to pop a DVD into the DVD player and I watched it.I relaxed for the rest of the day and I also did some more personal PC work.Overall,a very good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
While my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward,I am still in my daily struggles against BPD/Schizophrenia and SSA,which is the most difficult of the two for me.Though it is,I had no problems with temptations today.Since I was out for much of the afternoon,it took my mind off of anything sexual.It was great that I didn't have any problems today.Though I escaped unscathed today,there is still tomorrow and the days after tomorrow.Fellow blog followers and readers,please continue to keep me in your prayers and also,please leave me some positive verbal encouragement in the comments section.I still need your prayers and your positive verbal support each and every day and desperately.Your support in both of these areas helps keep me going.They also help keep me strong in my determination and motivation.They also help reaffirm and reassure me that I am not alone in this particular struggle.Please continue to give me your support through prayers and positive verbal support.Thanks in advance to all of you for your continued prayerful and positive verbal support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,I have nothing planned.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes for the day ahead.FJ

Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a wonderful and eventful day today.
Today,I woke up in the early morning and had my usual 2 cups of coffee.After that,I showered quickly and when I was finished,I had my usual quick breakfast.After breakfast,I got dressed up real quickly and I waited for a ride to church.When my ride came,they dropped me off and I went in for the morning's Holy Bible study class and the worship service afterwards.
Both the class and the worship service were wonderful as always.After some brief fellowship with some of the worshipers,I went out to meet my ride and he dropped me off at home.
When I got home,I got out of my suit and into a pair of sweatpants.I did my personal PC work quickly and after that was done,I walked over to the drug store to pick up a new prescription of one of my vital medications and I also bought a couple of microwavable soups.After paying for those things,I headed back home and when I got there,I put everything away and I popped a DVD into the DVD player and watched it.When that was over,I heated up one of the soups and that was my evening meal for the day.After I was finished eating,I did some more personal PC work and relaxed for the rest of the evening.I also planned for my evening retirement.Overall,a wonderful and eventful day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
While my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward,I am still in my daily struggles against BPD/Schizophrenia and SSA,which is the most difficult of the two for me.Though it the most difficult struggle for me,I must say that today,I had no problems with temptation.No,I wasn't tempted today.I went through the day with no problems.It was great that I had no problems nor issues with temptation today.Though I did escape today unscathed,there is always tomorrow and the days after tomorrow.It's not that I am worried about tomorrow.It is just that I have to continue to stay on guard and be watchful.Satan and his minions can strike at any time and I need to be prepared when they do,so I can go to my Heavenly Father in prayer and pray for strength to help me fight and resist in the name of his son Jesus Christ.I have to continue working on showing these unnatural sexual desires that I have that I own them and not the other way around.Fellow blog followers and readers,please continue to keep me in your prayers and also,please don't be afraid to leave me some positive verbal encouragement in the comments section.I still need prayerful and positive verbal support,though things were good today.They are very important to me as they both work in a lot of ways.They help keep me going.They also help keep me strong in terms of my motivation and determination.Please continue to pray for me and also,please leave me some positive verbal support in the comments section.Thanks in advance to all of you for your continued prayers and positive verbal support.Thanks also to both my heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,with the exception of having my niece take me to a local Dollar Tree store,I have nothing planned.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes and plans for the day ahead.FJ