Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving onward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I showered.After my shower,I had my usual quick breakfast and my usual 2 cups of coffee.After breakfast,I did my personal PC work and I got dressed to proceed with the rest of the day.
I had only a couple of things to get done.I first went to the local Salvation Army thrift shop to look around and I bought only a small paperback book and after paying for that,I looked around at a couple of garage sales in my hometown and after that,I headed over to the local Super Wal-Mart to pick up a can of cooking spray.After paying for that,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I put the can of cooking spray of cooking spray away and I relaxed and did a little reading.
After eating,I watched the evening news for a while and I did some more personal PC work.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
While my rocky road to recovery continues moving onward,I am still,on a daily basis,dealing and struggling with the symptoms of BPD and it's accompanying emotional roller coaster ride.I also have schizophrenic tendencies and that makes my BPD struggles even more difficult.I am still attending my therapy sessions.I am also continuing to take my medication as directed.I am also continuing to take my medication as directed.I am also continuing to rely more on my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ whenever this particular struggle seems to be getting way too overwhelming for me to handle.I simply take this particular struggle to my Heavenly Father in the name of his son Jesus Christ and I ask him to get me through the negatives and help me endure and they both help help in not only sustaining me,but also help keep me on a calm level plain.I am never alone in this particular struggle and that makes me a tad better.Thanks to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
Regarding my SSA struggles,I gave into temptation late last night by manipulating my genitals to sexual images of me that were clouding my mind and I did ejaculate while doing this.I really felt miserable after this happened as I knew that I failed my Heavenly Father once again.I immediately went to him in prayer and asked him to forgive me sinning and I asked him this in the name of his son Jesus Christ and after I was finished praying,I felt better as I knew and truly believed that I was forgiven for my sins and that the slate was wiped clean.Throughout the day today,I was tempted again to indulge in same sex fantasies and lusting of other men.Yes,I was.But today,I had to be really tough on myself as I fought these temptations.I also kept up in prayer to my Heavenly Father in the name of his son Jesus Christ to assist me by giving me the strength to help me fight and resist these terrible temptations.I asked for strength throughout the day and I knew that I was given the strength as I did feel much stronger after I finished praying.I am again asking that all of you keep me in your prayers as I am going through this very difficult emotional time.I need your prayers and your encouragement by placing some encouraging words in the comments section.Both your prayers and your encouraging words both help keep me going in this particular fight and struggle.They also help strengthen my determination to overcome this terrible SSA and also,they motivate me to continue in my healing journey to heal from these terrible unwanted and unnatural sexual desires that are connected with this terrible SSA.It is just that my blog gets many visitors and/or curiosity seekers,but they rarely leave any comments.Please leave me some encouraging words in the comments section as I truly and desperately need some words of encouragement right now and every day.Thanks in advance to all of you for your prayers and your encouragement.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for the weekend,I have made no plans.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes and plans for the day ahead.FJ