Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving onward.I had a wonderful and eventful day today.
Today,I woke up in the early morning and I showered.After my shower,I had my usual quick breakfast and my usual 2 cups of coffee.After breakfast,I got dressed up in a suit and I headed for church for the Holy Bible study class and the worship service afterwards.
Both the class and the worship service were wonderful.Today,there was a baptism and we also had Holy Communion.After some wonderful fellowship with my fellow worshipers,I headed for home.
On the way home,I stopped at a local supermarket to pick up a gallon of milk and after paying for that,I headed over to the local K-Mart to pick up a couple of things and after paying for those,I stopped at a couple of yard sales that were in area and looked around.After that,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I got out of my suit and into a pair of lounge pants.I also did my personal PC work.When that was finished,I relaxed and popped a DVD into the DVD player and watched it.
After eating,I watched the evening news for a while and I did some more personal PC work.Overall,a wonderful and eventful day as for me,going to church on Sunday always makes the day eventful.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
While my rocky road to recovery continues moving onward,I am still,on a daily basis,dealing and struggling with the symptoms of BPD and it's accompanying emotional roller coaster ride.I also have schizophrenic tendencies and that makes my BPD struggles even more difficult.I am still attending my therapy sessions.I am also continuing to take my medication as directed.I am also continuing to rely more on my Heaven;y Father and his son Jesus Christ whenever this particular struggle seems to be getting way too overwhelming for me to handle.I simply bring this particular struggle to my Heavenly Father in prayer and I ask him in the name of his son Christ Jesus' name to help get me through the negatives of this psychiatric double whammy that I struggle with and they both help in sustaining me.It shows that I am not alone in this particular struggle and that makes me feel a tad better.Thanks to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
Regarding my SSA struggles,I was again tempted to masturbate during the wee early morning hours when I was awakened by yet another erection.I sat up and proceeded to get out of bed and that made the erection start to soften and I didn't lay back down until my genitals were fully soft.I also went back to sleep when they were.Though I escaped this episode,I was tempted throughout the day to indulge in fantasies and lusting after other men and also,to manipulate my genitals for the purpose of getting them near/fully erect and/or to the point of orgasm and stopping.I turned to my Heavenly Father in prayer as I didn't want to sin against him.I prayed really hard to my Heavenly Father and I asked him in the name of his son Jesus Christ to give me the strength to help me fight and resist the temptations to sin against him by lusting and fantasizing with sexual images of men and to manipulate my genitals alongside these images and I really prayed so hard for strength to fight and resist these overwhelming urges and after praying,I felt stronger as I truly believed that my Heavenly Father heard me and gave me what I asked for.I felt stronger after that.I am also again asking that all of you who continually follow my blog and read my posts to please continue praying for me as I am still going through a very difficult emotional time at the moment.Please continue praying for me and also,please don't be shy and leave me an encouraging word or two for me in the comments section.I need both your prayers and your encouraging words.They both keep me going and help strengthen my determination to overcome this terrible SSA and also,they motivate me to continue in my healing journey to heal from these unwanted and unnatural sexual desires that I have that are connected with this terrible SSA.Thanks in advance to all of you for your prayers and encouragement.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,I have made no plans.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes for the day ahead.FJ