Today,I am feeling good but a little depressed at the same time.
Today,this afternoon,I gave into temptation by masturbating.I did feel miserable afterwards because,as I have typed up yesterday,I feel that masturbation poses a negative effect on my healing from unwanted SSA.I did not want to masturbate but I did and I felt lousy afterwards.I did ask my creator to forgive me and I felt better after doing so.But I still feel guilty about this and I feel that all I need is a good nights sleep to get over it.I wil feel better by tomorrow and I can just forget about it.I know that God wipes the slate clean after you ask to be forgiven for your sins and he forgets about it.
Why I feel good is that I had a very exciting day aside from that setback.I managed to find and add to my vinyl record collection,a rare UK pressing of an album by Genesis on Decca Records called Rock Roots.I also found a couple of albums by former member Steve Hackett called Spectral Mornings and Defector.I also managed to find a John Gary album called That Warm And Tender Glow and a couple of Tchaikovsky albums alongside the very first Average White Band album.A very eventfuul day despite the negative setback that happened.Again,after agood night sleep,I will feel better.
I am also in the middle of an emotional roller-coaster.My niece and her husband are seperated at this moment and it is putting the whole family on edge.We are all upset with her about to be ex-husband because he just simply left without saying goodbye nor giving any real reason as to why except that he does not love her anymore because she is "too controling".He is not doing much to help her or his family out.They have three children.Two daughters and one son.The son is the middle child.Again,it is a very hectic emotional roller coaster for me and my family and I never know what to expect anymore all because of this.
Any advice would be truly appreciated,including how I can fight the urge to masturbate.Thanks in advance.FJ