Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the early to mid morning and I had my usual 2 cups of coffee.After my coffee,I washed my hair and face over the sink,alongside shaving.After that,I had my usual quick breakfast.After breakfast,I got dressed quickly and I headed out to the monthly Men's Network meeting.
The meeting was wonderful.After it was over,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I changed back into pajamas and I laid down as I was still feeling sleepy.After getting back up,I quickly did my personal PC work and listened to a little music while doing so.When that was done,I relaxed and enjoyed a classic TV episode from a DVD set that I have.I also would prepare my evening meal after doing so.
After eating,I watched another classic TV episode from a DVD set that I have.I also did some more personal PC work.Later on,as it was getting late,I started to prepare for my evening retirement.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
My rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I am still in my daily struggles against BPD/Schizophrenia and SSA,which is the most difficult struggle that I have.Today,though it is,I had no problems in regards to temptations nor cravings to act out.While that was good,I was awakened from a deep sleep in the wee early morning hours when I was having a really terrible dream.The dream was about a married man and I having a secret Homosexual affair with each other.The man didn't resemble anyone that I know personally nor anyone that I have known previously in my life.Fortunately,I woke up with a gasp and I also had an erection as well.I simply dismissed the dream as being just that,a dream,and went back to sleep with no problems as the dream didn't recur nor come back.I went through the day today without any issues nor negativity.Fellow blog followers and readers,I am still needing your support daily and often.Please continue to keep me in your prayers.I also would appreciate some positive verbal support in the comments section.Your support helps keep me going and helps strengthen my determination.Please continue to pray for me.I also would appreciate some positive verbal support in the comments section.Thanks in advance to all of you for your continued support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ.
As for tomorrow,with the exception of church as usual and dinner at my niece's house,I have made no plans.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes and plans for the day ahead.FJ
1 comment:
FJ, going back through your posts for the last years, at first it was "feeling down" and now for a long time, "my rocky road continues...". Don't you even want to get away from all this and really live? Do you want to look back 10 years from now and see that there wasn't significant improvement or change?
You don't have to let those old thoughts consume you all the time. You don't have to give in to those sexual urges, don't use an excuse. As someone told me once, "don't be passive"! I don't get a thrill from reading your posts because it seems you have given up on hope, on things getting better. Do you get something out of talking about how you gave in and manipulated your gen....s? Reading that is almost suggestive to the person reading it. Think on these things. Then there are those who perhaps read what you say and think, "if he can't get away from sexual acting out, why do I even try? And he is a Christian!"
Just some thoughts you might want to consider. Let God's Word touch your heart when you read it. It is not just words on a page...God speaks to us through His Word. Ask Him to speak to you, to direct you, to heal you. TRUST GOD, there is no other way. HE WILL NEVER LEAVE YOU OR FORSAKE YOU, EVER! THAT'S WHAT L*O*V*E IS!
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