Tonight,I am feeling a little bit better.I had a not too exciting of a day today.I simply spent all day running errands for myself and my mom.After I completed the laundry pick-up and had lunch over at work,I ran the errands.I had to mail out a few important letters for my mom today so they would get to their destinations.They were simply bills.After that,I went home to take a nap because I did not get an awful lot of sleep last night.But even that was a chore.I had yet another flashback from my past when I used to have sexual relations with other men.I wound up masturbating to these.Though I felt miserable afterwards,I did feel better after asking for forgiveness from the creator.I still need to learn how I can overcome SSA and the stuff that accompanies it.I am going to take the advice of a friend and order that DVD of Overcoming Masturbation from that site called Evergreen International and see if it will help me out.It will have to wait until next month due to this being the Christmas season.But I am going to hold my head high and try to keep fighting.I need to know what it is I am doing wrong.
Tonight was also a first for me in a long time.I stayed home tonight and watched Santa Claus Is Coming To Town on DVD.The special was on the ABC network tonight but I watched the DVD so I would get no commercial interruptions.It was wonderful to watch that with no commercials.
The strange thing about tonight is that I no longer have those meetings to go to.The support group meetings at the church were closed off due to the problem of not having any co-leaders to take over.Not only that,attendance had dropped because members were getting more involved in their personal lives and taking on new responsibilities.But I am hanging in there.I feel that another group will be started soon.I am going to be talking to that lady again before the week is out.She did tell me that the group might start in January but I still would like to talk with her again about it.
Before the night was through for me,I did manage to get to a local drug store to drop off a prescription and pick up some Rolaids.I also got some Christmas cards that I need to send out next week to some friends of mine out of town and across the globe.I am hoping that they get them in time for the holiday.
Tomorrow is a work day.I am hoping that the shift goes by smoothly.I also have to mail out something tomorrow and I also have an appointment with my substitute sexual abuse support counselor.I am hoping that the session goes well.
That was my day today and my hopes for the day tomorrow.FJ