Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.

Today,I woke up in the early morning and had my usual coffee.After my coffee,I washed up real quickly and got dressed.I headed for work.

The work day went a little bit better than yesterday,but there were still some complications.After it was over,I did a little shopping at a local supermarket before heading straight home.

When I got home,I relaxed for a short spell and after that,I showered quickly.I also had a light evening meal and I did my personal PC work.I also watched a few videos online.Later on,as it was getting late,I prepared to retire for the evening.A complicated,but still,a little better day overall.

Fellow blog followers and readers,I'm still having this problem of mumbling angry,hateful and hurtful things to myself under my breath.It's starting to get worse than before and I want to stop before it gets even more worse.I feel miserable as a result of this.I also don't know whether I'm coming or going.I even mumble some very profane and ugly words within these terrible things I'm saying to myself.I'm also still saying under my breath "I hate these fucking people","I hate this fucking place" and "I hate these pathetic excuses for people."

I feel bad about this problem because I'm supposed to be a Christian.I go to church each week and even attend Holy Bible study class,which also includes being a participant in the class by reading certain bible passages and making comments.I even have a share in Holy Communion when it's a part of the worship service.I always keep asking my Heavenly Father in the name of his son Jesus Christ to forgive me for even saying these things,but the problem hasn't gone away and I'm still mumbling these same old hateful and hurtful things under my breath.I feel like a complete and total piece of scum because of this.I also feel like I'm among the most evil people in the world because of this or even the most evil of them all at times.This is really making me feel sad,regretful and also,I feel like I'm hurting myself already because of this terrible problem.I feel so unworthy of all of what I do spiritually as a result of this problem nor do I feel worthy of the spirituality in general.I also hate myself as a result of this problem and my self hatred will get worse if I don't stop and contain this problem.My SSA is skyrocketing as a result of this problem.I want to stop,but don't know how.

Please continue praying for me that I stop this problem and pray that I find a way to do so.I also need prayers to help me find the right spiritual Christian support groups to get me back on track.I also would appreciate positive verbal support,alongside some helpful advice on how I can stop this terrible problem,within the comments section.Thanks to all of you for your support.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ.

Tomorrow is a work day.I hope that the day goes well for me.FJ