Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving onward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I showered.After my shower,I had my usual quick breakfast and my usual 2 cups of coffee.After breakfast,I did my personal PC work and I got dressed to proceed with the rest of the day.
Today,it was a rainy day.We had non-stop rain throughout the day.I simply used the occasion to clean up around the house as it was raining.After that was done,I relaxed and took it easy for a while and I did some reading.
After eating,I watched the evening news for a while and I did some more personal PC work.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
While my rocky road to recovery continue moving onward,I am still,on a daily basis,dealing and struggling with the symptoms of BPD and it's accompanying emotional roller coaster ride.I also have schizophrenic tendencies and that makes my BPD struggles even more difficult.I am still attending my therapy sessions.I am also continuing to take my medication as directed.I am also continuing to rely more on my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ whenever this particular struggle seems to be getting way too overwhelming for me to handle.I simply talk about this particular struggle with my Heavenly Father and I ask him in the name of his son Jesus Christ to get through this struggle when it tries to get the better of me and they both help in sustaining me and also,keeping me on a more calmer and level plain.I am never alone in this particular struggle and that does make me feel a tad better.Thanks to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
Regarding my SSA struggles,I am going to be very blunt and honest here.I fell again this morning by masturbating to sexual images of men.I really felt miserable after I had fallen.I don't know what I am doing wrong here.I don't know why I keep falling here and there.After my fall,I immediately asked my Heavenly Father to forgive me for the fall and I really begged for his mercy as this was one of those continuous cycles of falls that have been happening as of late.After praying,I felt better and truly believed that I was forgiven.I also truly believed that the slate was wiped clean.I ask that all of you who continually follow my blog and read my posts to please keep up in prayer for me as I am going through this difficult emotional time.I also ask that you please leave me a comment or two in the comment section.I need both your prayers and your encouraging words.They both help keep me going and make me even more determined to continue in my determination to overcome this terrible SSA and also,they motivate me to continue in my healing journey to heal from these unwanted and unnatural sexual desires that I have that are connected with this terrible SSA.Thanks in advance to all of you for your prayers and your encouragement.Thanks to also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,I have made no other plans.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes for the day ahead.FJ