Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I showered quickly.After my shower,I had my usual quick breakfast and my usual 2 cups of coffee.After that,I got dressed quickly and I headed over to the place where the spirituality group was being held,only to realize that it was canceled for today.I simply joined in a meeting that they were having there and it was wonderful.After the meeting,we had ourselves a lunch and after that,I left and decided to have lunch at a local kitchen also as I was still a little hungry.After that,I headed for home.
On the way home,I stopped at a local Dollar Tree store to pick up a couple of things needed.After that,I stopped at a local McDonald's for a vanilla cone and after that,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I decided to relax and do my personal PC work.I also listened to some music while doing that.I also decided to relax for a bit and take it easy.
After eating,I watched the evening news for a while and I did some more personal PC work.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
While my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward,I am still,on a daily basis,dealing and struggling with the symptoms of BPD and it's accompanying emotional roller coaster ride.I also have schizophrenic tendencies and that makes my BPD struggles even more difficult.I am still attending my therapy sessions.I am also continuing to take my medication as directed.I am also continuing to rely more on my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ whenever this particular struggle seems to be getting way too unbearable for me to handle.I simply throw this particular struggle on my Heavenly Father as a burden and I ask him,in the name of his son Jesus Christ,to help get me through the negative effects of this particular psychiatric double whammy that I struggle with and they both help in sustaining me.They also help keep me on a much calmer and level plain.It shows that I am never alone in this particular struggle and that makes me feel a little bit better.Thanks to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
Regarding my SSA struggles,the temptation to masturbate came at me during the wee early morning hours when I was awakened by yet another erection.I sat up and proceeded to get out of bed and that made my genitals start to soften.When my genitals were fully soft,I laid back down and I went back to sleep.Though I escaped this episode,I was tempted throughout the day to indulge in lusting and fantasies of other men and also,to "near masturbate" when these sexual images started to cloud my mind.I took it to my Heavenly Father and I prayed for strength to fight and resist these urges.I asked him in the name of his son Jesus Christ to keep me strong as I didn't want to fall short.I prayed and prayed real hard.After I was finished,I felt much stronger and also,I knew and believed that my Heavenly Father heard me and gave me the strength that I asked for.I am also again asking that all of you who follow my blog and read my posts to please continue in prayer for me as I am going through this difficult emotional time.I am really struggling right now and I need all the prayerful support that I can get.I also ask that you please leave me an encouraging word or two for me in the comments section.Your encouraging words and prayers do help keep me going in this particular fight and struggle that gets difficult by the day.I also need my determination to overcome this terrible SSA strengthened each and every day.I also need my motivation strengthened to continue in my healing journey to heal from these unwanted and unnatural sexual desires that I have that are connected with this terrible SSA as both your prayers and encouraging help strengthen also.Thanks in advance to all of you for your prayers and encouragement.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,I haven't made no plans.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes for the day ahead.FJ