Tonight,my road to recovery continues uninterrupted.I had a very good and eventful day today.
Today,I woke up in the early morning and I bathed.After my bath,I had my usual quick breakfast and my usual 2 cups of coffee.After breakfast,I did my personal PC work and after that was done,I got dressed.I proceeded to get on with the rest of the day.
I had a spirituality group that I needed to attend.I attend this group every Thursday as I always look forward to it each and every week.I went to the group with a lot of positive anticipation and enthusiasm.
The group went great.After it was over,I headed over to a local community kitchen for lunch.After lunch,I headed for home.
On the way hone,I stopped at the bank to withdraw some money for myself.After that,I headed over to my insurance agent to pay my car insurance for the month.When that was paid,I headed over to a local store to pick up some candy for the upcoming holiday.After paying for the candy,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I simply relaxed and took it easy for a while.
After eating,I watched some of the evening news for a while and I got dressed up as I headed over to the church for a special Thursday night Holy Week service.The sermon was to discuss the importance of the Lord's Supper and it's significance in the Christian church.
The service was wonderful.I got a lot out of this and I learned some new things.After some wonderful fellowship with everyone that was there,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I decided to just take it easy and relax for the rest of the evening.Overall,a very good and eventful day.
Though my recovery continues unabated,I am still,on a one day at a time basis,dealing and struggling with the symptoms of bipolar depression with schizophrenic tendencies.I am still attending my therapy sessions.I am also taking my medication as directed.I am hoping that my recovery starts improving in the days and months ahead.
Regarding my SSA struggles,I was again tempted in the wee early morning hours when I was awakened by another erection.I was again tempted to masturbate it away,but again,I fought the temptation.It wasn't easy,but I escaped.I had to really work on resisting this current temptation as it was a really strong and overwhelming one.I really fought by twisting and turning until the erection died down.Though I escaped this one,I know that the temptation to act out in any way,shape or form can rear it's ugly head when least expected.I have to continue fighting the urge to masturbate an erection away when it happens.I also have to continue keeping in mind that masturbation will never give me what I want,which is affirmation of my gender identity and the feelings of authenticity that go with that affirmation.Masturbation will only reinforce the Homosexual identity,which is what I am trying to overcome and distance myself away from.If anyone out there has anything to advise or suggest,I am open to anything.Thanks.
As for tomorrow,I have made no plans.But whatever I do,I hope that it gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes for the day ahead.FJ