Tonight,I am feeling a little bit better after I had a talk with a counselor last night.I had a very good day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I bathed.After my bath,I had my usual quick breakfast and my usual 2 cups of coffee.After breakfast,I did my personal PC work and got dressed to proceed with the rest of my day.
I had a meeting with someone from the church in the early afternoon and I rushed to get ready for it.I was looking forward to this with a lot of positive anticipation and enthusiasm.I headed over there when the time came to go there.
The meeting was wonderful.After the meeting was over,I headed for home.
On the way home,I stopped at a local Dollar Tree store to pick up a few things.After paying for those items,I headed over to a local supermarket to pick up a few more things.After paying for those things,I headed straight home.In between all of that,I managed to withdraw some money for my mom from the bank.
When I got home,I relaxed and popped a DVD in the DVD player.
After eating,I watched the evening news for a while and I did some more personal PC work.Overall,a very good day.
My recovery continues and today,for the first time in quite a while,I was feeling a little bit better.After having a talk with a Christian counselor over the phone last night and I discussed with her about what I was going through.We talked for a while and we prayed together and after it was over,I felt better.I slept pretty good during the night and I didn't have any sexual images of men cloud my mind.I slept wonderfully and I got up in the mid morning feeling like a 1,000,000 ton weight had been lifted off of my shoulders.Last night's talk with her made me realize that I need to rely on God more than my own personal strength.I am weak,but God can make me strong with his power.I guess that throwing everything of yours on the Lord really makes a difference.I am not feeling sad nor anything negative.It was great and I am looking forward to talking with her again in the near future.
Regarding my SSA struggles,I was again tempted to masturbate in the wee early morning hours when an erection awakened me.I simply got up to use the bathroom as I had to use it.After using it,I simply went back to sleep and slept well until I did get up.For the first time in a long time,I had no temptation to act out in any way,shape of form.I also didn't have any cravings for anything sexual with other men nor to watch any porn.It was great.I went through the day without any anxieties nor any fears or temptations.I am just hoping that I can get through the near and distant future without having any of these temptations.I know that I still have to stay on guard and be watchful as those temptations can rear their ugly heads when least expected.I now know that I can pray and give these things to God through Jesus Christ now.I feel relieved and wonderful.Thank God and his son Jesus Christ for that.
As for tomorrow,I have made no plans.But whatever I choose to do,I hope that it gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes and plans for the day ahead.FJ