Tonight,my road to recovery continues to go forward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I bathed.After my bath,I had my usual quick breakfast and my usual 2 cups of coffee.After breakfast,despite some interruptions,I did my personal PC work and I got dressed to proceed with the rest of my day.
I first went to my spirituality group,which I was looking forward to with a lot of positive anticipation and enthusiasm.
The group meeting was wonderful.After it was over,I headed over to a local kitchen to have lunch and after that,I headed for home.
On the way home,I stopped at a nearby post office to drop off a package that I had to return.After that,I headed over to the local Super Wal-Mart to pick up something that I needed.After paying for that,I headed over to the drug store to pick up my mom's prescriptions.After paying the co-pay for those,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I helped out my mom a little more and in between,managed to get in some recommended Holy Bible readings in.My mom came home late yesterday and she has been resting comfortably since then.
After eating,I watched the evening news for a while and I did some more personal PC work.Overall,a pretty good day.
While my recovery continues to go forward,I am still,on a one day at a time basis,dealing and struggling with the symptoms of BPD and the emotional roller coaster ride that goes with it.It is never an easy thing to cope with.I never know ho wmy mood will be from one day to the next or from one minute to the next.I also have schizophrenic tendencies and that makes it even more difficult.I am still attending my therapy sessions and I am continuing to take my medication as directed.I am also still relying on both God and his son Jesus Christ more whenever the struggles seems to be getting too unbearable to handle or endure.I simply take it both God and Christ and they help sustain me.It also shows that I am not alone in my struggle.Thanks to both God and Christ for everything that they do.
Regarding my SSA struggles,I was again tempted to masturbate in the wee early morning hours when I was awakened by yet another throbbing erection.I had to really use all my strength to fight and resist this overwhelming temptation.I simply sat up for a while and after the erection died down,I laid down and went back to sleep.Though I escaped this episode,I still have to keep in mind that the temptation to act out on these unnatural desires that I have,no matter what form it might take,can rear it's ugly head when least expected.I am always at war with the sinful sexual desires that I wish that I didn't have to fight,but each and every day,I am always in the fight for my life against these unnatural sexual desires.The fight,at times,seems to get way too unbearable for me to handle.Still,I am always re;ying on both God and his son Jesus Christ to help me in those times.Whenever the temptation seems to be getting too unbearable for me to handle,I simply throw the temptation on both God in the name of his son Jesus Christ and after that,the temptation is reduced to nil.After that,I move on.If I ever do give into the temptation,I simply ask God in the name of his son Jesus Christ to forgive me and after that,the slate is wiped clean and is forgotten by God.Again,it shows that I am not alone in my struggle and that I don't have to go it alone.Thanks to both God and his son Jesus Christ for all of their help.
As for tomorrow,I have made no plans.But whatever I choose to do,I hope that it gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes for the day ahead.FJ