Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a wonderful and eventful day today.
Today,I woke up in the early morning and I showered quickly.After my shower,I had my usual quick breakfast and my usual 2 cups of coffee.After breakfast,I got dressed up into a suit and I headed for church for the morning's Holy Bible study class and the worship service afterwards.
Both the class and the worship service were wonderful.I also did a reading from the Holy Bible in front of the congregation at the podium and the responses were positive,which made me feel appreciated and loved.After some wonderful fellowship with my fellow worshipers,I headed for home.
On the way home,I stopped at a local Dollar Tree store to pick up a few things.After paying for those things,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I got out of my suit and into my casual clothes.I had a light lunch and after eating that,I did my personal PC work and after that was finished,I relaxed and watched a movie.
After eating,I watched the evening news for a while and I did some more personal PC work.Overall,a wonderful and eventful day as for me,going to church on Sunday makes the day eventful.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
While my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward,I am still in my daily dealing and struggles with BPD,it's symptoms and it's accompanying emotional roller coaster ride.I never know how my moods and/or emotions will be as I go from day to day,or at times,from minute/moment to minute/moment within the same day.I also have schizophrenic tendencies and that makes my BPD struggles even more difficult.I am still attending my therapy sessions.I am also continuing to take my medication as directed.I am also still continuing to rely more on God and his son Jesus Christ whenever this particular struggle seems to be getting way too overwhelming for me to handle.I simply talk about this particular struggle with God in the name of his son Jesus Christ and they both help in sustaining me.It shows that I am never alone in this particular struggle and that makes me feel a tad better.Thanks to both God and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do.
Regarding my SSA struggles,I was again tempted to masturbate in the wee early morning hours when I was awakened by yet another throbbing erection.I sat up for a while and I proceeded to get up out of bed and that made the erection soften and when my genitals were fully soft,I went back to bed and to sleep.Though I escaped this episode,I had to put up with even more temptation throughout the day as the temptation to act out on these unnatural desires that I have by means,such as fantasies,lusting and also,to manipulate my genitals to get them near/fully erect and/or to the point of orgasm and stopping.I was tempted to do all of that throughout the day.I kept up in prayer to God in the name of his son Jesus Christ as these temptations were coming on strong.I didn't want to fall again as I have fallen four times already this week as result of an emotional tailspin that I have been in as a result of some negative things happening.I am trying to get back into the whole process of healing from SSA and to keep away from anything or anyone that might try to get me to compromise what I have learned to be the cold hard God honest truth.It is never an easy thing to deal with and it is very difficult to resist temptations to act out in any way,shape or form.I am again asking for prayers by everyone who follows my blog and reads the posts on here.I am also again asking that all of you to please don't be shy and leave an encouraging word or two for me in the comments section.Your prayers and your encouraging words both help keep me going in this fight and struggle and make me even more determined to overcome SSA and to continue in my healing journey to heal from the unwanted and unnatural sexual desires that I have that are connected with SSA.Thanks in advance to all of you for your prayers and your encouragement.Thanks also to both God and Christ for everything that they do.
As for tomorrow,I have made no plans.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes for the day ahead.FJ