Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving onward.I had a pretty fair day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I showered.After my shower,I had my usual quick breakfast and my usual 2 cups of coffee.After breakfast,I did my personal PC work,but really didn't have much to do today as a result of it raining all through the day.I just stayed home and took it easy for the day.
I managed to get some work done that I have been putting off for quite some time.I chose to do it today and was pleased to get it finished.After that,I relaxed and popped a DVD into the DVD player.
After eating a light dinner,I watched the evening news for a while and I did some more personal PC work.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
While my rocky road to recovery continues moving onward,I am still,on a daily basis,dealing and struggling with the symptoms of BPD and it's accompanying emotional roller coaster ride.Aside from that,I am also plagued with schizophrenic tendencies and that makes my BPD struggles struggles even more difficult.I am still attending my therapy sessions.I am also continuing to take my medication as directed.I am also still continuing to rely more on God and his son Jesus Christ whenever this particular struggle seems to be getting way too unbearable for me to handle.I simply talk to my Heavenly Father in the name of his son Jesus Christ and I tell him everything.I feel a tad better once I have done that as they both help in sustaining me.I am never alone in this particular struggle and that makes me feel only a little bot more relieved.Thanks to both God and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do.
Regarding my SSA struggles,I was again tempted to masturbate in the wee early morning hours when I was awakened by yet another erection,though it didn't last very long.I got out of bed to use the bathroom,as I had to use it,and when I was finished,my genitals had fully softened and I went right back to bed and to sleep.Though I did escape this episode,I did give into a later temptation while still in bed when I grabbed my genitals and manipulated my genitals to sexual images of men clouding up my mind.I actually managed to stop myself and I immediately asked God to forgive me for sinning against him by doing that and I did feel better as I truly believed that I was forgiven.I was tempted throughout the rest of the day to indulge in lusting and fantasies to sexual images of other men and yes,the temptation to manipulate my genitals to these sexual images also happened as well.I had to keep up in prayer all day to my Heavenly Father and asked him in the name of his son Jesus Christ to give me the strength to fight and resist all of these temptations and I did feel better and much stronger after doing so.Though I have done that,I am again asking for all of you who follow my blog and also read the posts to continue praying for me as I am going through this very complex emotional time and also,please don't be shy and leave an encouraging word or two in the comments section.My blog gets many visitors and/or curiosity seekers,but comments of any kind,especially encouraging ones,are rare.Please don't be shy and leave an encouraging word or two for me in the comments section.I need some encouraging words right now to help keep me going in this struggle and to also continue motivating me to continue on my healing journey from everything connected with this terrible SSA.Thanks in advance to all of you for your prayers and your encouragement.Thanks also to both God and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do.
As for the weekend,with the exception of church on Sunday,I have really nothing else planned.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes and plans for the weekend ahead.FJ