Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I showered.After my shower,I had my usual quick breakfast and my usual 2 cups of coffee.After that,I quickly did my personal PC work and I got dressed to proceed with the rest of the day as I had a few things planned.
I had only a couple of things on my agenda for today.I had to go to a local garage and get my oil changed.After that was done,I headed to the local city school district office to vote in the primary today.After that,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I relaxed and I decided to do more personal PC work.
After eating,I watched the evening news for a while and I did some more personal PC work.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
While my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward,I am still,on a daily basis,dealing and struggling with the symptoms of BPD and it's accompanying emotional roller coaster ride.I never know how my moods and/or emotions will be from one day to the next,or at other times,from one minute/moment to the next within the same day.If having the emotional roller coaster ride of BPD wasn't bad enough,I also have schizophrenic tendencies and that makes my BPD struggles even more difficult.I am still attending my therapy sessions.I am also continuing to take my medication as directed.I am also continuing to rely more on my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ whenever this particular struggle seems to be getting way too overwhelming for me to handle.I simply take this particular struggle to my Heavenly Father and I throw it on him as a burden.I ask him in the name of his son Jesus Christ to give me the strength to help me endure through the negative affects of this particular psychiatric double whammy that I have.I also ask him for the strength to help get me through it all.They both help in sustaining me.They also help keep me on a much calmer and level plain.It shows that I am never alone in this particular struggle and that does make me feel a tad better.Thanks to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
Regarding my SSA struggles,I was again tempted to masturbate during the wee early morning hours when I was awakened by yet another erection.I sensed that I had to use the bathroom.I headed for the bathroom and that made my genitals start to soften,though it was slow going.When I was finished,my genitals were fully soft and I went right back to bed and subsequently to sleep.Though I escaped this episode,I was tempted throughout the day to indulge in lusting and fantasies of other men.Throughout the day,sexual images of men kept clouding my mind repeatedly.I really had to pray really hard to my Heavenly Father for the strength to fight and resist these urges as they kept coming at me from all sides.I asked him for that strength in the name of his son Jesus Christ to help me fight and resist these overwhelming urges.I asked for strength to help me fight and resist as these urges kept coming at me.After I was finished,I felt better and also,much stronger.I truly knew and believed that my Heavenly Father heard me and that he gave me what I asked for.While I have been doing that,I am again asking that all of you who follow my blog and read my posts to please keep in praying for me as I am still going through a very difficult emotional time.Please continue to pray for me as I need all the prayerful support that I can get.I also ask that you please leave me some words of encouragement in the comments section.I need both your prayers and your encouraging words.My blog gets many visitors and/or curiosity seekers,but comments are rarely left.Please pray for me and also,please leave some encouraging words in the comments section.Your prayers and your encouraging words both help keep me going in this particular fight and struggle.They strengthen my determination to continue in my goals to overcome this terrible SSA.They also strengthen my motivation to continue in my healing journey to heal from these unwanted and unnatural sexual desires that are connected with this terrible SSA.Thanks in advance to all of you for your prayers and your positive verbal encouragement.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,I have made no plans.But I hope that whatever I choose to gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes for the day ahead.FJ