Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the early morning and I showered quickly.After my shower,I had my usual quick breakfast and my usual 2 cups of coffee.After breakfast,I did my personal PC work and I got dressed to proceed with the rest of the day as I had a few things planned.
I had a few things on my agenda today.I first went to my usual Thursday morning spirituality group and I was looking forward to that.
The group meeting went well.After the meeting was over,I headed for a local kitchen to have lunch and after that,I headed for home.
On the way home,I stopped at the local Super Wal-Mart to get a gallon of milk.After paying for that,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I put the milk away and I relaxed and did some more personal PC work.
After eating,I watched a movie that I popped into the DVD player while relaxing.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
While my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward,I am still,on a daily basis,dealing and struggling with the symptoms of BPD and it's accompanying emotional roller coaster ride.The depression that I have had since this past Saturday is starting to finally lift.I am feeling a little bit better.I am still feeling some sadness,but it is getting better.I am hoping that by the end of this week,I will be feeling better.I am also still dealing with the schizophrenic tendencies that I have and that does make my struggles with BPD and this current depression even more difficult.I am still attending my therapy sessions.I am also continuing to take my medication as directed.I am also relying more on my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ whenever this particular struggle is seemingly getting way too difficult for me to handle.I throw this struggle on my Heavenly Father as a burden and I ask him to help me endure through the negative effects in the name of his son Jesus Christ.I feel more sustained and much more at ease after praying.I am never alone in this particular struggle and that does make me feel a tad better.Thanks to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
Regarding my SSA struggles,I gave into temptation last last night by masturbating to sexual images of men that clouded my mind while I was trying to get to sleep.When I fell,I immediately asked my Heavenly Father to forgive me in the name of his son Jesus Christ.I prayed real hard and I left nothing out.When I finished praying,I felt better as I truly believed that I was forgiven by my Heavenly Father and that the slate was wiped clean.I really need to work real hard in keeping my mind off of sexual stuff and more on positive and healthy stuff.I have to continually keep in mind that my Heavenly Father doesn't approve of this sort of thing.I have been on a healing journey for a long time now and I still seek healing.I want to heal and I want to be whole.I keep praying that I want to heal,but I fail at times and I am back to square one all over again.I want to heal from these unwanted and unnatural sexual desires that I have that are connected with this terrible SSA that I struggle with.I am again asking that all of you who follow my blog and read the posts to please keep praying for me.I also ask that you leave me an encouraging comment or two in the comments section.I need both your prayers and your encouraging words.They both help keep me going in this particular fight and struggle.Please continue praying for me.Please don't be shy and leave me an encouraging word or two for me in the comments section.My blog gets many visitors and/or curiosity seekers,but they rarely leave any comments.Thanks in advance to all of you for your prayers and your continues positive verbal encouragement.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,I haven't made any plans.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes for the day ahead.FJ