Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I showered.After my shower,I had my usual quick breakfast and my usual 2 cups of coffee.After breakfast,I did my personal PC work and I got dressed to proceed with the rest of the day as I had a few things planned.
I didn't have too much to do today.I simply went out and ran a few errands that needed to be run.I spent out much of the day trying to get everything that needed to get done accomplished.After I was finished with the errands,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I relaxed and popped a DVD into the DVD player and watched it.
After eating,I watched a little TV and I did some more personal PC work.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
While my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward,I am still,on a daily basis,dealing and struggling with the symptoms of BPD and it's accompanying emotional roller coaster ride.I never know how my moods and/or emotions will be from one day to the next,or at other times,from one minute/moment to the next within the same day.I also have schizophrenic tendencies and that makes my BPD struggles even more difficult.I am still attending my therapy sessions.I am also continuing to take my medication as directed.I am also still continuing to rely more on my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ whenever this particular struggle seems to be getting way too difficult for me to handle.I simply throw this particular struggle as a burden.I ask my Heavenly Father in the name of his son Jesus Christ to help me endure through the negative affects of this particular struggle with this psychiatric double whammy that I have.They both help in sustaining me and also help keep me on a much calmer and level plain.It shows that I am never alone in this particular struggle and that does make me feel a tad better.Thanks to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
Regarding my SSA struggles,I was again tempted to masturbate during the wee early morning hours when another erection woke me up out of a deep sleep.I tossed and I turned,but that only made the erection throb.I proceeded to get out of bed and walk for a bit,which made the erection start to soften.After about a few minutes,my genitals returned to full softness and I went right back to bed and subsequently back to sleep.Though I escaped this episode,I was tempted throughout the day to indulge in sinful lusting and fantasizing of other men.Yes,I was tempted.Since I was out for much of the day,I stayed busy.It kept my mind off of sexual thoughts of men and also,kept my hands busy,so I wouldn't touch myself inappropriately.It kept my mind on positive things and kept me focused on things that I was doing and I didn't think too much about anything sexual with men.Though I did escape today unscathed,I am still asking for prayers by all of you who continually follow my blog and read my posts.Please continue praying for me.I also ask that all of you please leave me an encouraging word of two for me in the comments section.I desperately need both prayers and positive verbal encouragement.They both help keep me going.They also help keep me strong for my determination to overcome SSA and my motivation to continue in my journey to heal from these unwanted and unnatural sexual desires that I have that are connected with this terrible SSA.Thanks in advance to all of you for your prayers and your continued positive verbal encouragement.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,with the exception of church as usual,I have really nothing planned.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes and plans for the day ahead.FJ