Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I showered.After my shower,I had my usual quick breakfast and my usual 2 cups of coffee.After breakfast,I got dressed quickly and I headed over to my Thursday morning spirituality group.
The group meeting was wonderful and I got a lot out of it.After it was over,I headed over to a local kitchen for lunch and after I was finished eating,I headed over to my case-worker's office to sign some papers.After that was done,I headed for home.
On the way home,I stopped at a gas station to get a little bit of gas.After that,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I changed into a warm sweatsuit and I did my personal PC work.When that was done,I got dressed to prepare for my evening Holy Bible study group,which also was wonderful.I headed for a local supermarket to pick something up.After that,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I changed into some night clothes to get ready for evening retirement.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
While my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward,I am still struggling with the symptoms of BPD/Schizophrenia and that,in itself,is a very difficult struggle.I never know how my moods and/or emotions will be.At times,I can be up and feeling good.Other times,I can be down and feeling not so good.That is how it is when one has BPD.If having BPD wasn't bad enough,I also have Schizophrenia and with that,I have hallucinatory affects.I hear things that other people can't hear and at times,people get the wrong idea of people who suffer and struggle with this.They always accuse you of being on drugs,such as marijuana,cocaine or worse than those,LSD/Acid or that you are a heavy drinker of alcoholic beverages.One minute,I can hear a voice call my name and there is nobody there.Another minute,I hear footsteps and when I look around,there is nobody there.When I continue on,these things come back and I am back at square one by turning around again and seeing nobody.It makes me feel confused and baffled at times.This psychiatric double whammy that I have also makes my SSA struggles even more difficult.At times,I get tempted to act out on the unnatural desires that I have and those temptations can be very overwhelming at times.I am in therapy for the psychiatric double whammy that I have,but when in that particular therapy,I leave out my SSA struggles as mental health therapy is so one sided when it comes to the struggle with SSA.Those in the mental health profession preach that everyone who has unnatural sexual desires and feelings for members of their own gender should simply act out on them and not feel guilty about doing so.The thing is that my Heavenly Father,through his sacred word the Holy Bible,condemns this sort of thing.The Holy Bible,the word of the sovereign Lord and creator of the world,including those who live in the world,and the universe,condemns the sexual activity between two members of the same gender.The Holy Bible states that such activity is unclean,impure,unnatural,inappropriate,obscene and just plain wrong.The Holy Bible also says that those who indulge in that type of practice will not inherit his kingdom.I was tempted to act out today,but I was out of the house pretty much today and being out of the house took my mind off of the unnatural sexual desires that I have.It also helped lessen the temptations.Though I escaped today unscathed,I am again asking that y'all who follow my blog and read the posts that I write here to please continue praying for me.I also ask that y'all please leave me some encouraging word or two for me in the comments section.I need both your prayers and your continued positive verbal encouragement.I need them both each and every day.They both help keep me going.They also help keep me strong in my determination and motivation.Thanks to y'all in advance for your continued prayers and your continued positive verbal encouragement.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,since it is going to rain all day,I am thinking of simply staying home and catching up on some much needed house cleaning.
That was my day today and my hopes and plans for the day ahead.FJ