Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I showered.After my shower,I had my usual quick breakfast and my usual 2 cups of coffee.After breakfast,I did my personal PC work and was about to start cleaning up around the house when my next door neighbor called saying she wanted me to come along with her to the local animal hospital because her cat was hurting again and it was the same thing that was last week.I went with her to the animal hospital and they put a bandage on her cats paw and leg and we headed straight home.
When we got home,I relaxed for a bit and I went upstairs to get that cleaning work done.I only got some of it done as I need more garbage bags to put some more garbage in as I do have a lot of garbage to throw away.I am hoping to get some more by next week after the Thanksgiving holiday.It will take me some time,but I will get the place cleaned and it will be worth sleeping in when it is.After that,I went to prepare my evening meal.
After eating,I watched an episode of a classic TV show on DVD.After that,I did some more personal PC work.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
While my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward,I am still dealing and struggling with BPD/Schizophrenia.It is a very difficult struggle in itself and it never gets any easier.My moods and/or emotions fluctuate from time to time.I never know how they will be.I also have to put up with the hallucinatory effects of Schizophrenia.This psychiatric double whammy that I have is nothing to sneeze at.It is very tough to struggle with.It also makes my SSA struggles even more difficult.My therapy for this psychiatric double whammy is ongoing and I will be seeing the nurse practitioner on Monday afternoon.I am also continuing to take my medication as directed.Today,I actually gave into temptation by manipulating my genitals for the purpose of getting them near/fully erect and/or to the point of orgasm and stopping.Yes,it was to sexual images of men that clouded my mind.Fortunately,I was able to stop before it went too far and asked my Heavenly Father to forgive me for sinning in the name of his son Jesus Christ.I prayed real hard as I was sorry for what I did.I did feel better after praying and I moved on with the rest of the day.Fortunately,that was the only occurrence today in regards to temptations linked to my struggles with SSA.The SSA struggle is also a very difficult one in itself.The battle to fight and resist the temptations to act out on the unnatural desires that I have that are connected to SSA is a really tough battle.I am always fighting these desires that I have.It isn't easy,but I know that the battle can be won with the right stuff.I am gradually starting to make frequent prayers a part of my daily life.I need to if I want to overcome this terrible SSA.Little by little,I am starting to do this.The thing is that I don't want these unnatural desires that I have own me.I have to tell these desires that I own them and not the other way around.I now know that I do have to get my Heavenly Father involved more.I am going to continue working on making prayer a part of my life.While I am working on that,I am again asking that y'all who continually follow my blog and read my posts to please continue praying for me.I also ask that none of you be shy and leave some words of positive encouragement in the comments section.I need both of these things.They both help keep me going.They also help keep both my determination and my motivation strong.Thanks in advance to all of you for your prayers and your continued positive verbal encouragement.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for the weekend,with the exception of church as usual on Sunday,I haven't made any plans.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes and plans for the weekend ahead.FJ