Tonight,my road to recovery continues onward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the early morning and I bathed.After my bath,I had my usual quick breakfast and my usual 2 cups of coffee.After that,I did my personal PC work and I got dressed.I proceeded to get on with the rest of my day.
I only had a couple of things planned,as the weather was cold and a little snowy today,after the warm relief we had the last couple of days.I first went to the post office to get a money order and after that was done,I headed over to a local supermarket to pick up a few things.After paying for those items,I headed straight home and stayed there for the rest of the day.
When I got home,I relaxed and popped a DVD in the DVD player.
After eating,I watched the evening news for a while and I also did some more personal PC work.Overall,a pretty good day.
Though my recovery continues onward,I am still,on a daily basis,dealing and struggling with the symptoms of bipolar depression with schizophrenic tendencies.I am still attending my therapy sessions.I am also taking my medication as directed.I am hoping to continue feeling better in the near and distant future.
Regarding my struggles with SSA,I was tempted early this morning when I had a morning erection.I really wanted to masturbate it away,but decided to tough it out.I kept tossing and turning until the erection had died down.After that,I slept peacefully for next few hours.I know that I will get erections when least expected and that it is a part of what as well as who I am gender wise.But whenever this happens,my temptation to masturbate it away intensifies.But I managed to fight it off.But I was tempted a little bit in the later morning hours.I was actually manipulating my genitals for the purpose of getting them erect or near erect for masturbatory purposes.But I managed to stop myself in this and it didn't go any further.For the rest of the day,the temptation to act out in that way was minimal if nil at best.Though I did win in this particular fight to resist temptation,I still have to keep in mind that the ugly demon known as temptation can rear it's ugly head when least expected.I still have to stay on guard and be watchful.But I did analyze this and I found that I was still tired in those early morning hours,upon waking and getting up,and when tired,you are still somewhat weak and when temptation starts to strike,you really don't have enough strength to resist,but even in this state,temptation can be resisted.I narrowly escaped that episode,but I know that there will be more times coming when the temptation as well as the urge to give in to the desires will come back and at times,it can be stronger than the last time.Thanks to all of you who read for your support,encouragement and advice.
Tomorrow,I have a spirituality group that I must attend.After that,I have made no other plans.But whatever I do,I hope that it gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes for the day ahead.FJ