Tonight,my road to recovery continues,though still rocky.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in mid morning and I bathed quickly.After my bath,I had my usual quick breakfast and my usual 2 cups of coffee.After breakfast,I did my personal PC work and I immediately got dressed.I had a few things planned for today and I wanted to get them done.
I first had a spirituality group that I needed to attend.I needed to get a lot more out of this as I did the previous week.I was looking forward to this group with a lot of positive anticipation and enthusiasm.
The group was wonderful.After it was over,I left to go to a local community kitchen to get a light lunch.After lunch,I headed over to the local Super Wal-Mart to pick up something that was needed.After paying for that,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I simply relaxed and watched a movie while doing so.
After eating,I watched the evening news for a while.I also did some more personal PC work and did some recommended readings of the Holy Bible and some stuff that I have also been studying.Overall,a pretty good day.
My road to recovery continues,but it is still a very difficult road.I am still having to put up with the symptoms of bipolar depression and the up and down emotional roller coaster ride that I am constantly on.I don't know which days that I will be up or which days that I will be down.Aside from that,I also have to endure the schizophrenic tendencies that I have alongside the bipolar depression.I have to put up with hearing things that nobody else hears.The worst part is not really putting up with the symptoms of each of these disorders.The worst part is putting up with the ignorance of the public who have a lot of nasty things to say about those who have to endure and suffer mental illness.The public continually calls us names like freak,freakazoid,crazy,stupid,airhead and lots of other nsaty names.I wish that the public wouldn't be so ignorant when it comes to us mentally ill people.It isn't our faults why we have these things.You all need to understand that though we have these mental illnesses,we are still people like the rest of you are and we are also still human like the rest of you are.I still continue to attend my therapy sessions and I am still taking my medication as directed.I am hoping that my recovery will start improving very soon.
Regarding my SSA struggles,I was again tempted to masturbate in the wee early morning hours when I was awakened by an erection.I really had to fight this as I did give in yesterday in the wee early morning hours.I didn't want to give in a second consecutive time.I am always continuing to keep in mind that masturbation will never give me what I want and need nor will it fulfill my needs in any way,shape or form as masturbation only reinforces the Homosexual identity.I will just have to stay strong and use all the strength that I have to continue to resist.Thanks in advance for any ideas or suggestions.
Tomorrow,I have an appointment with the pastor of the church and I will also be attending a charity spaghetti dinner tomorrow at the church.
That was my day today and my hopes and plans for the day ahead.FJ