Tonight,my road to recovery continues.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the early morning and I bathed.After my bath,I had my usual quick breakfast and my usual 2 cups of coffee.After breakfast,I did my personal PC work and I got dressed to proceed with the rest of my day.
I didn't have too much to do today.I first went to a local Dollar Tree store to pick up something my mom needed.After paying for that,I headed over to the local Super Wal-Mart to pick up a couple of things that I needed.After paying for those items,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I put everything that I bought away and I popped a DVD in the DVD player and relaxed.
After eating,I watched the evening news for a while and I did some more personal PC work.Overall,a pretty good day.
My road to recovery continues to go forward and though it isn't as rocky as it was before,I still have to endure and put up with the symptoms of BPD and the struggle with that is never an easy one.Though I am not on the emotional roller coaster as much as I was before,I still have to put up with the up and down emotions that I endure on a daily basis.It is never an easy thing to struggle or deal with.Aside from that,I also have to put up with the schizophrenic tendencies that I have alongside the BPD and that makes it even more difficult.But I am still relying on God and his son Jesus Christ to get me through this difficulty and to help me through it all.As stated,the struggle with BPD and having schizophrenic tendencies alongside that is never easy,but with God and his son Jesus Christ helping me through it,it does make it a little easier.I am now more confident that with their help,I can get through anything.As the Holy Bible states "With God,all things are possible".
Regarding my SSA struggles,I was again tempted to masturbate in the wee early morning hours when I was awakened by another throbbing erection.I had to really fight this temptation as it was an overwhelming one.I got through it without falling and simply got up to use the bathroom as I had to use it.After finishing in the bathroom,I went back to sleep.I also almost gave into temptation by attempting to manipulate my genitals for the purpose of getting erect or near erect while bathing for the purpose of masturbation,but managed to stop myself before going any further.Though I escaped these two episodes,I have to continually keep in mind that the temptation to sin can rear it's ugly head when least expected.Each and every time that I resist any temptation,the temptation comes back stronger than before and can really be overwhelming.But as I said above,I simply continue to rely on God through his son Jesus Christ to get me through by going to them in prayer and putting everything in their hands.After that,I feel better as if a big weight has been lifted off of my shoulders.I now have nothing to worry about or fear as God and his son Jesus Christ are in control and having to rely on them rather than my own strength gives me a wonderful feeling that can't be matched by anything sinful,such as indulging in sexual activity with another man.It is terrific that when you put everything in the hands of God and his son Jesus Christ,the feeling is always wonderful and everything is alright.Thanks go to God and Jesus Christ for everything.
Tomorrow,I will be attending church as usual,including the Holy Bible study class before the worship service.I am also hoping to get around to doing my laundry as well as it is piling up.
That was my day today and my hopes and plans for the day ahead.FJ