Tonight,my road to recovery continues onward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I bathed.After my bath,I had my usual quick breakfast and my usual 2 cups of coffee.After breakfast,I did my personal PC work and I got dressed to proceed with the rest of the day.
After eating a light lunch,I decided to go to the hospital and pat my mom a visit.After spending some time talking with her and everything,I headed for home.
On the way home,I stopped at a local supermarket to pick up a couple of things.After that,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I called my niece and she came over to do some necessary cleaning up around the house to prepare for my mom's coming home.After it was done,which took some time,I relaxed and I popped a DVD in the player and watched it.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading in.
After eating,I watched the evening news for a while and I did some more personal PC work.Overall,a pretty good day.
While my recovery continues to go onward,I am still,on a daily basis,dealing and struggling with the symptoms of BPD and the emotional roller coaster ride that goes with it.I don't know if I will be up and feeling good or down and not so good.It sometimes happens all on the same day.I simply don't know how my mood will be from one day to the next or from one minute to the next.Aside from that,I also have schizophrenic tendencies and that makes my struggle even more difficult.But despite these difficulties,I still rely on God and his son Jesus Christ more than on my own strength.I am still in therapy and I am still taking my medication as directed,but that is not enough,as I do need God and Christ in my life to help ease me whenever this struggle seems to be getting out of control or too unbearable to endure.Without them,I would be on the road to nowhere and the struggle would feel too unbearable.I am constantly relying on them to help sustain me and keep me on the right track.Thanks to both God and Christ for everything.
Regarding my SSA struggles,I was again tempted to masturbate in the wee early morning hours when I was awakened by yet another erection.Fortunately,it didn't last long.I simply started to sit up and as I did,the erection started to soften.I sat up for a while and didn't lay back down until my genitals were soft.I had to get up and use the bathroom anyway and when I was finished in the bathroom,I laid back down.Though I did escape the episode,I am still keeping in mind that the temptation to act out on these unnatural desires that I have can rear it's ugly head when least expected.I have to continually stay on guard and be watchful as I never know when the temptation will strike.It seems to strike when I am not even thinking of anything sexual,but somehow,anything sexual can cross my mind at anytime.I am still going to continue to rely on God and his son Jesus Christ whenever that temptation rears it's ugly head at me.I simply throw it on them and they help in sustaining me and helping me to clear my mind of anything immoral.I simply keep talking to them about it and I don't stop until it fades away.The more that I do that,the more I feel better.Thanks to both God and his son Jesus Christ for everything.
As for the weekend,I have made no plans.But whatever I do,I hope that it gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes for the weekend ahead.FJ