Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving onward.I had a wonderful and eventful day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I showered.After my shower,I had my usual quick breakfast and my usual 2 cups of coffee.After breakfast,my personal PC work followed and I got dressed to proceed with the rest of the day.
I had a few things planned.I first had to sign some important papers at the place where the groups are held and after that,I headed for a local restaurant to pick up a sandwich and after eating it,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I relaxed and watched a couple of holiday themed DVD's.
I ate dinner early as a result of the planned Christmas Eve candlelight church service,which I attended.
The service was a wonderful delight.After some wonderful fellowship,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I changed into my PJ's and relaxed while watching a couple more holiday themed DVD's.Overall,a wonderful and eventful day.I even managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
While my rocky road to recovery continues moving onward,I am still battling and struggling with the symptoms of BPD daily and still enduring that constant emotional roller coaster ride associated with it.It is never easy and it varies from day to day,or at times,from minute/moment to minute/moment.I also have schizophrenic tendencies and that does make my BPD struggles even more difficult.I am still attending my therapy sessions and I am still taking my medication as directed.I am also still continuing to rely more on God and his son Jesus Christ more whenever the struggle seems to be getting way too unbearable for me to handle.I simply talk about this particular struggle with God in the name of his son Jesus Christ and they both help in sustaining me.It shows that I don't have to struggle alone and that is pretty good.I also feel a tad better knowing that they are there.Thanks to both God and his son Jesus Christ for being there for me.
Regarding my SSA struggles,I was again tempted to masturbate in the wee early morning hours when yet another throbbing erection woke me up out of a deep sleep.I sat up for about a couple of minutes and waited for the erection to soften and when it did,I went back to sleep.Though I escaped this episode,I am still on a daily battle with these terrible SSA desires and they are really a difficult thing to fight against.I get tempted to manipulate my genitals for teh purpose of getting them near/fully erect or at the point of orgasm and stopping,but at times,a climax does happen and it makes me sorry that I did that.When that happens,I do ask God in the name of his son Jesus Christ to forgive me and I do feel better after that.But still,I am going to really need all the prayerful support from everyone who follows and reads my blog and also to please leave an encouraging word or two in the comments section as both your positive words of encouragement and prayers help keep me going in this struggle and even more determined to continue fighting and also to continue to try and overcome this terrible SSA.Thanks in advance for all of your prayers and encouragement.Thanks also to both God and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do.
Tomorrow,I will be attending the morning's Christmas church service and having dinner at my sister's house later on in the day.After that,I am just going to go home and take it easy and watch a few more holiday themed DVD's.
That was my day today and my plans for the holiday ahead.FJ