Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward,though still a little rough.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I showered.After my shower,I had my usual quick breakfast and my usual 2 cups of coffee.After breakfast,I did my personal PC work and I got dressed to proceed with the rest of the day as I had a few things on my agenda.
I had to pick up a few newspapers and drop them off at a few people's houses that I knew and after that was done,I headed over to the local K-Mart to pick up a couple of things that I needed.After paying for those things,I stopped to see how a friend of mine was doing and after spending a few minutes with him,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I changed into a sweatsuit and I relaxed for a while and watched a little TV.
After eating,I watched the evening news for a while and I did some more personal PC work.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
While my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward and yes,the road is a little rough,I am still on my daily battle and struggle with BPD and it's accompanying emotional roller coaster ride.I never how I will be emotionally or mood wise from day to day,or at times,from minute/moment to minute/moment.While having BPD is bad enough,I also have to struggle with the schizophrenic tendencies that I have and that really makes my BPD struggles even more difficult.It also doesn't make my SSA struggles any easier,either.I am still attending my therapy sessions.I am also continuing to take my medication as directed.I am also still continuing to rely more on God and his son Jesus Christ whenever the struggle seems to be getting way too difficult and/or way too unbearable for me to handle.I simply talk about this particular struggle with God in the name of his son Jesus Christ and they both help in sustaining me.It shows that I am never alone and that it is also wonderful that they are there to help me whenever I need them for help.Thanks to both God and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do.
Regarding my SSA struggles,I gave into temptation early this morning by masturbating and yes,sexual images of men crept up into my mind,which was the root cause of this fall.After the fall,I immediately asked God in the name of his son Jesus Christ to forgive me and I did feel better as I truly believed that I am forgiven for that fall.Throughout the day,I kept up in prayer to God as the temptations kept coming at me.They were attacking me at all sides and I had to really pray hard to God in the name of his son Jesus Christ as I didn't want to fall again.I kept it up and asked God for strength to fight and resist all of these temptations in the name of his son Jesus Christ and after that,I felt better as the temptations were reduced to nil.I am again asking that all of you who follow my blog and read my posts to continue praying for me as I am going through this complex emotional time.Please also leave an encouraging word or two for me in the comments section as well.It is just that my blog does get visitors,but rarely leave an encouraging comment or two for me.Please don't be shy.If you have something to say that can/could benefit me,please leave it in the comments section.Again,please don't be shy.Please also continue in prayer for me as both your prayers and encouraging words help keep me going in this fight and make me even more determined to overcome this terrible SSA and also,I probably wouldn't fall as much if you did leave an encouraging word or two for me.Thanks in advance to all of you for your prayers and for your positive encouragement.Thanks also to both God and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do for me.
Tomorrow,there will be a special dinner at my church and I am going to attend that,which is the only thing that I have planned.As for much of the day beforehand,I have nothing else planned,but I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes and plans for the day ahead.FJ