Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I got up in the mid morning and I showered.After my shower,I had my usual quick breakfast and my usual 2 cups of coffee.After breakfast,I did my personal PC work and I got dressed to proceed with the rest of the day as I had a few things planned.
I first went to the bank to withdraw some money and after I was done doing that,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I had a light lunch and after that,I registered all of the bills that I had at the Where's George site?After that was done,I headed back out.
I first went to pay off a debt that I owed someone and after that,I headed over to a local supermarket to pick up a few things.After paying for those items,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I relaxed and watched a little TV.
After eating,I watched the evening news for a while and I did some more personal PC work.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
While my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward,I am still,on a daily basis,dealing and struggling with the symptoms of BPD and it's accompanying emotional roller coaster ride.My moods and/or emotions vary by the day or at times,by the minute/moment.It can get pretty monotonous at times.Aside from the ups and downs of BPD,I also have schizophrenic tendencies and that makes my BPD struggles even more difficult.It also doesn't make my SSA struggles any easier,either.I am still attending my therapy sessions.I am also continuing to take my medication as directed.I am also continuing to rely more on God and his son Jesus Christ more whenever the struggle seems to be getting way too unbearable for me to handle.I simply talk about this particular struggle with God and they both help in sustaining me.I am never alone in this struggle,or any other struggle that I have and that is wonderful.God does help in many ways and it is great that he doesn't let me suffer alone.Thanks to both God and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do.
Regarding my SSA struggles,I was again tempted to masturbate in the wee early morning hours when I was awakened by yet another throbbing erection,though it didn't last long.I tossed and turned,but it only got harder.I sensed that I had to use the bathroom and I got up and went to the bathroom.As I was on the way to the bathroom,the erection started to soften and when I was finished,my genitals were fully soft and I went back to bed and back to sleep.Though I escaped this episode,I did give into a later temptation to manipulate my genitals for the purpose of getting them near/fully erect and/or to the point of orgasm and stopping and yes,sexual images of men crept up into my mind as I gave into this particular temptation.When I got out of bed,I sat down and immediately asked God in the name of his son Jesus Christ to forgive me for sinning.I was also tempted throughout the day as the terrible temptations kept trying to overwhelm me.I kept up in prayer to God in the name of his son Jesus Christ and asked God in his son Christ Jesus' name to give me the strength to fight and resist all of these temptations as I didn't want to sin against God in any way,shape or form.I kept up praying and praying all day and I did feel better after doing so.I am again asking for prayers by everyone who follows my blog.Please keep up in prayer for me and please don't be afraid to leave an encouraging word or two for me in the comments section.It is just that my blog gets lots of visitors and curiosity seekers,but they usually don't leave an encouraging word or two for me in the comments section.Both your prayers and your encouraging words help keep me going in this fight and struggle and make me even more determined to continue in my journey to overcome this terrible SSA and the unnatural sexual desires that I have that are connected with it.Please keep up in prayer for me and also,please don't be shy and leave an encouraging word or two for me.Thanks in advance to all of you for your prayers and for your encouragement.Thanks also to both God and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do.
As for the weekend,I have a Men's Network meeting tomorrow morning and I have church on Sunday,including the morning's Holy Bible study class an hour and a half before the worship service.As for the rest of the weekend,I haven't gotten much planned.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes and plans for the day ahead.FJ