Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving onward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I showered quickly.After my shower,I had my usual quick breakfast and my usual 2 cups of coffee.After breakfast,I did my personal PC work and I got dressed to proceed with the rest of the day as I had a few things planned.
I first went to my Thursday morning spirituality group and that meeting went well as usual and after that was over,I headed over to a local kitchen to have lunch and after I was finished,I headed for home.
On the way home,I stopped at a local supermarket to pick up something that I needed.After paying for that,I headed over to the local K-Mart to see if they had something that I needed in stock,but they still didn't.After that,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I relaxed and popped a DVD into the DVD player.
After eating,I watched the evening news for a while and I did some more personal PC work.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
While my rocky road to recovery continues moving onward,I am still,on a daily basis,dealing and struggling with the symptoms of BPD and it's accompanying emotional roller coaster ride.I never know how my moods and/or emotions will be from one day to the next,or at times,from one minute/moment to the next.It can be tiresome and draining at times.I also have schizophrenic tendencies and that makes my BPD struggles even more difficult.I am still attending my therapy sessions.I am also continuing to take my medication as directed.I am also still continuing to rely more on God and his son Jesus Christ whenever this particular struggle seems to be getting way too difficult for me to handle.I simply talk about this particular struggle with God in the name of his son Jesus Christ and they both help in sustaining me.It shows that I am not alone in this particular struggle and that makes me feel a tad better.Thanks to both God and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do.
Regarding my SSA struggles,I was again tempted to masturbate in the wee early morning hours when I was awakened by yet another throbbing erection.I attempted to get out of bed and that slowly softened the erection and I sat up for a while and when my genitals were fully soft,I laid back down and went back to sleep.Though I escaped this episode,I was still tempted to indulge in lusting and fantasies with sexual images of men clouding my mind and I had to really fight the impulse to indulge in genital manipulation to these sexual images of men.I had to really use all of my strength to fight and resist these urges.I even turned to God and asked him in prayer in the name of his son Jesus Christ to give me strength to fight and resist these urges and also,to help me keep my mind clear of all these sexual images.It is a really tricky and difficult life that we who struggle with SSA lead and it can get pretty overwhelming.It can get so overwhelming that at times,it may try to emotionally drain and can also tire us out.But again,I kept praying to God for strength each and every time that these urges came at me and I felt better and also much stronger as the temptations were all reduced to nil.While I have been doing that,I am again asking that all of you who continually follow my blog and read the posts to continue praying for me as I am going through this emotionally intense time.I am also again asking that all of you to please leave an encouraging word or two for me in the comments section.My blog gets many visitors,but comments are rare.Please don't be shy and leave an encouraging word or two for me in the comments section.Your prayers and your encouraging words both help keep me going in this fight and make me even more determined to continue in my goals to overcome this terrible SSA and also,to continue in my healing journey from the unwanted and unnatural sexual desires that I have that are connected with this terrible SSA.Thanks in advance to all of you for your prayers and your encouragement.Thanks also to both God and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do.
As for tomorrow,I have made no plans.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes for the day ahead.FJ