Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving onward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I showered.After my shower,I had my usual quick breakfast and my usual 2 cups of coffee.After breakfast,I got dressed and I did 4/5 of my personal PC work.I had a few things planned for today and I wanted to get them done.
I had only one really big thing on my agenda for today.I had an appointment with a urology associates office to get my groin area checked out to see what could be causing my problems in my frequent bathroom going throughout the day and also,the pains that I've been getting in my groin area.
The whole thing took almost a minute,and according to the doctor,everything checks out good,but he did say that my prostate gland is acting up and he advised me to continue taking the prescribed medication and I also got two antibiotic pills to take with dinner for two nights,including tonight.After the whole procedure was over,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I relaxed and finished my personal PC work.I also went out to pick up something for dinner as I wasn't in the mood to cook anything and I was still feeling a little at edge after the procedure that I had today was done.
After eating my take-out dinner,I watched the evening news for a while and I did some more personal PC work.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done today as well.
While my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward,I am still,on a daily basis,dealing and struggling with the symptoms of BPD and it's accompanying emotional roller coaster ride.I also have to deal with schizophrenic tendencies at the same time and that makes my BPD struggles even more difficult.I am still attending my therapy sessions.I am also continuing to take my medication as directed.I am also still continuing to rely more on God and his son Jesus Christ whenever this particular struggle seems to be getting way too difficult for me to handle.I simply talk about this particular struggle with God in the name of son Jesus Christ and they both help in sustaining me.It shows that I am not alone in this particular struggle and that makes me feel only a little bit better.Thanks to both God and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do.
Regarding my SSA struggles,the temptation to masturbate came at me in the wee early morning hours when another erection woke me up out of deep sleep.I turned to the left side of my bed and the erections softened and when my genitals were fully soft,I went back to sleep.Thought I escaped this episode,I did give into a later temptation a little later on when it was daylight when lustful and sexual images crept up into my mind while I was still in bed and not fully awake at that point and I manipulated my genitals to these images,but I managed to stop myself before going too far.When I finally got up out of bed,I immediately asked God in the name of his son Jesus Christ to forgive me for giving into these particular temptations and I really prayed hard to God for that forgiveness and after that,I felt better as I truly believed that I was forgiven and that God has wiped the slate clean and forgotten my sins.Throughout the rest of the day,I really didn't have any more problems as the procedure that I had to endure later on in the day was on my mind for the rest of the day.I am still feeling a little at edge after the whole thing,but I am just glad that it is all over with.My mind wasn't on anything except the procedure and also,that sort of kept my mind clear of all things immoral.I am still going to feel a little irritation for the next few days while I urinate,but it will hopefully be gone within that few days.I am again asking that all of you continue in prayer for me.Please continue praying for me and also,please leave an encouraging word or two for me in the comments section.Your prayers and your encouraging words both help keep me going.They make me even more determined to continue in my goals to overcome this terrible SSA and also,to continue in my healing journey to heal from these unwanted and unnatural sexual desires that I have that are connected with this terrible SSA.Thanks in advance to all of you for your prayers and your encouragement.Thanks also to both God and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
Tomorrow,with the exception of folding up my laundry,I have no other plans.But I hope that whatever I choose to gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes and plans for the day ahead.FJ