Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I showered.After my shower,I had my usual quick breakfast and my usual 2 cups of coffee.After breakfast,I did my personal PC work and I got dressed to proceed with the rest of the day as I Had a few things planned.
The main thing that I had planned was that I went to a local place to fill out a handwritten job application in and also,I included my resume and the business card for the counselor of the local job placement agency.After doing that,I headed for home.
On the way home,I stopped at the local Super Wal-Mart to pick up a few things.After paying for those things,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I relaxed and caught up on some reading that I have been putting off.
After eating,I watched the evening news for a while and I did some more personal PC work.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
While my rocky road to recovery continues moving onward,I am still,on a daily basis,dealing and struggling with the symptoms of BPD and the emotional roller coaster ride that goes with the territory of having BPD.I never know how my moods and/or emotions will be from one day to the next,or at other times,from one minute/moment to the next.If having BPD wasn't bad enough,I also have schizophrenic tendencies and that makes my BPD struggles even more difficult.I am still attending my therapy sessions.I am also continuing to take my medication as directed.I am also still continuing to rely more on my Heavenly Father and and his son Jesus Christ whenever this particular struggle seems to be getting way too difficult for me to handle.I simply take this struggle to my Heavenly Father in the name of his son Jesus Christ and I really talk hard about it and they both help in sustaining me.It shows that I am not alone in this struggle and that makes me feel a tad better.Thanks to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
Regarding my SSA struggles,I was tempted to masturbate in the wee early morning hours when I was awakened by yet another erection.I sat up and proceeded to get out of bed to head for the bathroom as I had to use it.After I was finished,my genitals were fully soft and I went right back to bed and to sleep.Though I escaped this episode,I did give into a later temptation to manipulate my genitals and yes,sexual images of men did could my mind as I did this,but fortunately,I managed to stop myself before it went too far and asked my Heavenly Father in the name of his son Jesus Christ to forgive me for giving into this temptation and I did feel better as I truly believed that I was forgiven and that the slate was wiped clean.I was tempted throughout the day to indulge in same sex fantasies and lusting,but I kept up in prayer all through the day and I prayed for strength to fight and resist all of these terrible temptations that were coming at me from all sides.I am again asking that all of you who follow my blog and read my posts here on my blog.I also ask that you leave me an encouraging word or two in the comments section.My blog gets many visitors and/or curiosity seekers,but they rarely leave a comment of any kind.Please leave me an encouraging word or two in the comments section.Your prayers and your encouraging words both help keep me going in this fight and struggle and make me even more determined to continue in overcoming this terrible SSA and also,they motivate me to continue in my healing journey to heal from these unwanted and unnatural sexual desires that are connected with this terrible SSA that I am struggling with.Thanks in advance to all of you for your prayers and encouragement.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for the weekend,with the exception of church on Sunday,I haven't made any plans.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes and plans for the weekend ahead.FJ