Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving onward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the early morning and I showered.After my shower,I had my usual quick breakfast and my usual 2 cups of coffee.After breakfast,I did my personal PC work and I got dressed to proceed with the rest of the day as I had a few things planned.
I had plans to work with someone in my church to see about having the church services broadcast on public access television.As a result of this,I had an early dinner so I wouldn't have to pick up a can of soup or anything else canned as a quick dinner after returning home.Before talking with him,I had a light lunch and decided to do my recommended Holy Bible reading early in the day so I could simply take it easy and relax until it was time for me to go to bed.I also received information about a job somewhere and I told him that I would pay a visit to the place tomorrow afternoon and inquire about it.
The meeting that we had with the public access station went pretty good and they informed us that they would be in touch.After the meeting was over,we left and I dropped him off at home.I also headed straight home after that.
When I got home,I relaxed and took it easy for a while until it was time for me to go to bed.Overall,a pretty good day.
While my rocky road to recovery continues moving onward,I am still,on a daily basis,dealing and struggling with the symptoms of BPD and it's accompanying emotional roller coaster ride.I never know how my moods and/or emotion will be from one day to the next,or at other times,from one minute/moment to the next within the same days.I also have schizophrenic tendencies and that makes my BPD struggles even more difficult and also,my struggles with SSA at the same time.I am still attending my therapy sessions.I am also continuing to take my medication as directed.I am also continuing to rely more on my Heavenly Father in the name of his son Jesus Christ whenever this particular struggle seems to be getting way too overwhelming for me to handle.I simply talk about this particular struggle with my Heavenly Father in the name of his son Jesus Christ and they both help in sustaining me.It shows that I am never alone in this particular struggle and that makes me feel a tad better.Thanks to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
Regarding my SSA struggles,I was again tempted to masturbate in the wee early morning hours when I was awakened by yet another erection.I sat up and proceeded to get out of bed and though it was slow going,the erection did start to soften and when I headed for the doorway of my room,the erection started to soften a little bit more.After finishing in the bathroom,my genitals were fully soft and I went back to bed and to sleep.Though I did escape this episode,I was tempted at a few times throughout the day to indulge in same sex sexual fantasies and lusting after other men.I kept up in prayer to my Heavenly Father in the name of his son Jesus Christ as these terrible temptations kept coming at me.I prayed hard for strength to fight and resist all of these terrible temptations.Though today it wasn't as bad as on other days,the temptations still kept on coming.I kept myself busy as the day went on when it came to talking about having church services from the church I worship at be broadcast on public access at the public access TV station.Though I have been keeping up in prayer to my Heavenly Father,I am again asking that all of you who follow my blog and read my posts here to please continue in prayer for me as I am going through all of this.Please continue to pray for me and also,please don't be shy and leave a positive word or two of encouragement for me in the comments.I need all I can get to continue in this fight against this terrible SSA and to also motivate me to continue to seek healing from SSA as well.Thanks in advance to all of you for your prayers and your encouragement.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
Tomorrow,with the exception of inquiring about the job opening,I have no other plans.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes and plans for the day ahead.FJ