Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving onward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I showered.After my shower,I had my usual quick breakfast and my usual 2 cups of coffee.After breakfast,I did my personal PC work and I got dressed to proceed with the rest of the day as I had a few things planned.
I first went to the bank to withdraw some money to pay an important bill.After that,I headed back home to register the bills and after that,I paid the bill and I also returned to the bank to pay another bill.After that,I dropped some newspapers off at a few people's places and after that was done,I sent out another payment through the post office and after that,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I relaxed and did a little bit more personal PC work.
After eating,I watched the evening news for a while and I did some more personal PC work.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done.
While my rocky road to recovery continues moving onward.I am still,on a daily basis,dealing and struggling with the symptoms of BPD and it's accompanying emotional roller coaster ride.My moods and/or emotions vary by the day,or at other times,by the minute/moment within the same day.I also have schizophrenic tendencies and that makes my struggles with BPD even more difficult.I am still attending my therapy sessions.I am also continuing to take my medication as directed.I am also still continuing to rely more on my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ whenever this particular struggle seems to be getting way too overwhelming for me to handle.I simply talk about this particular struggle with my Heavenly Father in the name of his son Jesus Christ and they both help in sustaining me and keeping me at a steady level plain.It shows that I am not alone in this particular struggle and that makes me feel a tad better.Thanks to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
Regarding my SSA struggles,the temptation to masturbate came at during the wee early morning hours when I was awakened by yet another erection,though it didn't last very long.I had to get up and use the bathroom and I headed for there and as I was doing that,the erection started to soften and was fully dead when I was finished.I went right back to sleep after I was finished.Though I escaped this episode,I gave into yet another later temptation when images of men clouded my mind and I gave into the temptation to lust and fantasize by manipulating my genitals for the purpose of getting them near/fully erect and/or to the point of orgasm and stopping.Fortunately,I managed to stop myself before it went too far and I immediately asked my Heavenly Father to forgive me in the name of his son Jesus Christ and I did feel much better as I truly believed that I was forgiven and that my sin was forgotten by my Heavenly Father.Since I was out for much of the day,I was tempted to do anything,such as lust and fantasize and that was very good.I went through the rest of the day without anything to worry about.Though I did get through the rest of this day,there is still tomorrow and the day after that and so on.I am again asking that all of you who follow my blog and read my posts to please continue in prayer for me as I am going through this difficult emotional time and also,to please leave an encouraging word or two in the comments section.My bog gets many visitors and curiosity seekers,but comments are rare.Please leave me an encouraging word or two for me in the comments section.Your prayers and your encouraging words both help keep me going in this particular fight and struggle and make me even more determined to overcome and heal from this terrible SSA.Thanks in advance to all of you for your prayers and your encouragement.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,I have made no plans.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes for the day ahead.FJ