Happy 4th To All Americans

Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a little bit improved day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I showered.After my shower,I had my usual quick breakfast and my usual 2 cups of coffee.After breakfast,I did much of my personal PC work and I got dressed to proceed with the rest of the day as I had a few things planned.
For much of the day,I went out and did my grocery shopping and after that,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I put all the groceries away and I started to get ready to go to have dinner with somebody who invited me over and when the time had come for me to go,I headed over that and I made it there despite some heavy traffic that I encountered getting there as a result of this being the 4th of July holiday.
We had some pizza and chicken wings for dinner and after we were finished,we had some small talk and when he told me that he was going to rest for a while,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I put on some music,took my medication and finished my personal PC work.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done.Overall,a little bit improved day over yesterday,though not much different.
While my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward,I am still dealing and struggling with the symptoms of BPD and it's accompanying emotional roller coaster ride.This time around,my moods have been fluctuating quite a bit.This is the result of what has been wrong with my car and I am really feeling pretty much at edge and also,I am really feeling the negatives of what I am going through psychiatric disability wise.The schizophrenic tendencies have also been striking me pretty hard as well.I have been hearing so much around me that it is to the point where it is beyond insane.In almost another week,I have to see the nurse practitioner at the local hospital and I will be explaining this to her when the day comes.I now have to work on keeping my therapy sessions in check as to try not to miss them like I accidentally missed my therapist appointment recently.I am also going to rely heavily on my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ to make sure that I stay sustained,stabilized and on a more level styled plain.If they can get me through this negative time,I will be extremely and positively thankful to both of them.I am going to need all the help that I can get from my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ.
Regarding my SSA struggles,I gave into temptation during the wee early morning hours by masturbating to lustful and fantasy styled images of men.I actually manipulated my genitals to the images and I wound up ejaculating.After cleaning myself from that,I immediately asked my Heavenly Father to forgive me in the name of his son Jesus Christ as I was truly sorry and repentant for my actions.I did feel better after that,but for much of the night,I had a difficult time trying to get to sleep as a result of what went on with my car and the starter problems and I was really worried about what could happen if it stays in the same place for too long a time.I did manged to doze off without realizing it and though I did have an erection later on as the wee early morning hours were winding down,but this didn't last very long.I now have to work on staying close to my Heavenly Father and his son Christ Jesus in prayer so I won't fall again.I am also again asking for prayers by everyone who follows my blog and read the posts.Please continue to pray for me as I am going through this difficult emotional time and also,please leave me an encouraging word or two for me in the comments section.My blog gets many visitors and/or curiosity seekers,but comments are rarely left.I need both your prayers and your encouraging words.Both your prayers and your encouraging words help keep me going in this fight and struggle and they both make me more determined to continue in my journey to overcome and heal from this terrible SSA as I really need many people to support me in this struggle as I can't go it alone.Please leave an encouraging word or two for me in the comments section and also,please continue to pray for me.Thanks in advance to all of you for your prayers positive encouragement.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,I haven't made no plans.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes for the day ahead.FJ