July 1st

Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in mid morning and I showered.After showering,I had my usual quick breakfast and my usual 2 cups of coffee.After breakfast,I did my personal PC work and I got dressed to proceed with the rest of the day as I had a few things planned for today,though most of it was at home.
I had some more cleaning up that I had to do around the house and that is what I did for most of the day.I simply cleaned up here and there around the house and after that was done,I relaxed and did some reading.
After eating,I watched the evening news for a while and I did some more personal PC work.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
While my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward,I am still,on a daily basis,dealing and struggling with the symptoms of BPD and it's accompanying emotional roller coaster ride.I have a very complicated emotional system where my mood can be up and good one day or minute/moment and down and not so good the next day or minute/moment.If having BPD wasn't bad enough,I also have schizophrenic tendencies and that makes my BPD struggles,alongside my SSA struggles,even more difficult.I am still attending my therapy sessions.I am also continuing to take my medication as directed.I am also continuing to rely more on my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ whenever this particular struggle seems to be getting way too difficult for me to handle.I simply have my Heavenly Father take over and I ask him in the name of his son Jesus Christ to help get me through the worst of this psychiatric double whammy that I have and they both help in not only sustaining me,but also help keep me on a relatively calm and level plain.It shows that I am not alone in this particular struggle and that does make me feel a little bit better.Thanks to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for being there and for everything that they do and provide.
Regarding my SSA struggles,I was again tempted to masturbate in the we early morning hours when I was awakened by yet another erection.I sat up for a while and I didn't lay back down until the erection had fully softened.It was slow going,but the erection did soften and when my genitals were fully soft,I laid back down and went right back to sleep.Though I escaped this episode,I was tempted throughout the day to indulge in lusting and fantasies of other men.The burning lust that I had within me was starting to burn again as it did the last few days.I really had to pray hare to my Heavenly Father and asked him in the name of his son Jesus Christ to give me the strength to fight and resist these temptations and also,to help me control this burning lust that I had within me.I prayed really hard and again,asked for strength to fight and resist all of these terrible temptations and also asked my Heavenly Father that he removed the burning lust that was within me if that were possible and I felt much better and much stronger as I finished praying as I truly believed that my Heavenly Father heard me and gave me the strength that I asked for to help me fight and resist all of these temptations.While I have been doing that,I am also again asking that all of you who follow my blog and read my posts to please keep up prayer for me as I am going through this difficult and trying emotional time.I also ask that all of you please leave an encouraging word or two for me in the comments section as well.My blog gets many visitors and/or curiosity seekers,but comments of any kind are rare.Please don't be shy and leave me an encouraging word or two for me in the comments section as I really could use some encouraging words right now.Your prayers and your encouraging words both help keep me going and also,they make me even more determined to continue in my determination to overcome this terrible SSA that I struggle with and also,they motivate me to continue in my healing journey to heal from these unwanted and unnatural sexual desires that I have that are connected with this terrible SSA condition.Thanks in advance to all of you for all of your prayers and your encouragement.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for being there and also,for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,I haven't made any plans.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes for the day ahead.FJ