Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving onward.I had a wonderful and eventful day today.
Today,I woke up in the early morning and I showered quickly.After my shower,I had my usual quick breakfast and my usual 2 cups of coffee.After breakfast,I got dressed up quickly in a suit and I headed for church for both the morning's Holy Bible study class and the worship service afterwards.
Both the class and the worship service went great.After some wonderful fellowship with my fellow worshipers,I headed for home.
On the way home,I stopped at a local Dollar Tree store to pick up a few things that I needed.After paying for those things,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I put the stuff that I bought away and I had a light lunch.After that,I did my personal PC work.When I was finished,I relaxed for a while.
After eating,I watched the evening news for a while and I did some more personal PC work.Overall,a wonderful and eventful day as for me,going to church on Sunday makes the day eventful.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
While my rocky road to recovery continues moving onward,I am still,on a daily basis,dealing and struggling with the symptoms of BPD and it's accompanying emotional roller coaster ride.I also have schizophrenic tendencies and that makes my BPD struggles even more difficult.I am still attending my therapy sessions.I am also continuing to take my medication as directed.I am also continuing to rely more on my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ whenever this particular struggle seems to be getting way too difficult for me to handle.I simply throw this particular struggle on my Heavenly Father and I ask him in the name of his son Jesus Christ to help me get through the negative affects of this particular psychiatric double whammy that I struggle with.They both help in keeping me sustained and on a much calmer level plain.It shows that I am not alone in this particular struggle and that does make me feel a tad better.Thanks to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
Regarding my SSA struggles,I gave into temptation late last night by masturbating.There was some lusting involved in this fall as well.After washing my hands,I immediately asked my Heavenly Father to forgive me for sinning against him by falling by masturbation.I prayed real hard and I didn't leave anything out.I did feel better and I also knew and truly believed that I was forgiven.For much of the day when I came home from church,I stayed busy by keeping in touch with my online friends on both Facebook and sending e-mails to my friends via my many e-mail accounts.I also had to continuously help a Facebook contact to go to our Heavenly Father in prayer to ask for strength to fight and resist the urge to masturbate as he was lusting and yearning to see my private parts.I continuously told him that I couldn't do that as that would be sinful for me to do.He did continuously insist,but I stood my ground.I kept up my ground and simply and tactfully told him that I was signing off and that I was going to pray for him that he receives strength for our Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ.I also prayed that he would go to our Heavenly Father in prayer and ask for that strength to fight and resist that particular urge.I am hoping that he does the right thing and prays and prays real hard.I also didn't want to fall again,so I kept close to my Heavenly Father and I asked him in the name of his son Jesus Christ to give me the strength to fight and resist the urges as they came at me from all sides.I prayed and prayed and I knew that my Heavenly Father heard me and gave me what I asked for.I am also again asking for prayers by all of you who continually follow my blog and read my posts to please continue praying for me as I am still going through a very difficult emotional time.Please continue praying for me and also,please don't be shy and leave me an encouraging word or two for me in the comments section.They both help me going in this particular fight and struggle.They also both strengthen my determination to overcome this terrible SSA.They also strengthen my motivation to heal from these unwanted and unnatural sexual desires that I have that are connected with this terrible SSA.Thanks in advance to all of you for your prayers and your encouragement.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,I have made no plans.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes for the day ahead.FJ