Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the early morning and after a few early morning phone calls,I showered quickly and after my shower,I had my usual quick breakfast and my usual 2 cups of coffee.After breakfast,I did my personal PC work and I got dressed to proceed with the rest of the day as I had a few things planned.
I first went to the bank to withdraw some money to pay a bill at a local supermarket.Before the payment was made,I headed back home to register the bills at the Where's George site and after that,I headed back out to pay the bill at a local supermarket.After that was done,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I relaxed and did some more personal PC work while doing so.
After eating,I watched the evening news for a while and I did some more personal PC work.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
While my rocky road to recovery continues moving onward,I am still,on a daily basis,dealing and struggling with the symptoms of BPD and it's accompanying emotional roller coaster ride.I never know how my moods and/or emotions will be from one day to the next,or at other times,from one minute/moment to the next.I also have schizophrenic tendencies and that makes my BPD struggles even more difficult.I am still attending my therapy sessions.I am also continuing to take my medication as directed.I am also still continuing to rely more on my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ whenever this particular struggle seems to be getting way too difficult for me to handle.I simply throw this particular struggle on my Heavenly Father as a burden and I ask him in the name of his son Jesus Christ to help me endure the negative effects of this particular psychiatric double whammy that I struggle with.They both help in not only sustaining me,but also,they help keep me on a much calmer and level plain.Thanks to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
Regarding my SSA struggles,I was tempted to masturbate during the wee early morning hours when an erection woke me up out of a deep sleep.I started to get up out of bed and that is what made my genitals start to soften.After staying up for a period of time,I went right back to bed and to sleep once my genitals were fully soft.Though I escaped this particular episode,I was tempted throughout the day to indulge in lusting and fantasies of other men.I was also tempted to "near masturbate" with them as well.I chose to stay busy throughout the day as I went through the day.I stayed outside and also kept my fingers busy.I also cleaned up a little bit around the house and tried to keep things orderly.This took my mind off of anything sexual with other men.I also even managed to do some praying as well.I prayed to him in the name of his son Jesus Christ for strength to help me fight and resist these urges that were coming at me from all sides and after that,I felt much stronger and also,I knew and believed that my Heavenly Father gave me what I asked for.I am also again asking that all of you who continually follow my blog and read the posts here to please continue in prayer for me and also,please leave me an encouraging word or two for me in the comments section.My blog gets many visitors and/or curiosity seekers,but comments of any kind are rare.Please leave me an encouraging word or two.You never know how good both of these can do.Your prayers and your encouraging words both help keep me going and also,they strengthen my determination to overcome this terrible SSA and they also motivate me to continue in my healing journey to heal from these unwanted and unnatural sexual desires that I have that are connected with this terrible SSA.Thanks in advance to all of you for your prayers and your encouragement.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for the weekend,I have made no plans.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes for the day ahead.FJ