Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a pretty good day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I had a couple cups of coffee.I actually woke up with a terrible pounding headache and I couldn't think straight nor stay awake.I took something for my headache and laid back down while listening to some soft classical music.Within an hour,my headache was gone and I went into the bathroom to shower.After my shower,I had my usual quick breakfast.After breakfast,I did my personal PC work and I got dressed to head out to do a couple of things.
I first dropped off my laundry at my niece's house and after that,I headed over to a local Dollar Tree store to check and see if they had something that I was looking for,which they didn't.After that,I headed straight home.
When I got home,I got back into a sweatsuit and did some more cleaning up in my old upstairs room.After that,I did some more personal PC work and relaxed.
After eating,I decided to watch a few more holiday themed DVD's and I did some more personal PC work.Overall,a pretty good day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
While my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward,I am still in my daily struggles with BPD/Schizophrenia and SSA.The thing with the SSA struggle is that it's my most difficult struggle and my struggle with BPD/Schizophrenia makes it even more difficult.Today,I gave into yet another temptation to manipulate my genitals to sexual images of men clouding my mind and it led to ejaculation.I immediately asked my Heavenly Father in the name of his son Jesus Christ to forgive me for sinning against him as I was truly sorry for what I did.I don't know what really makes me do this thing so much.I really hate it when I fall short as I feel that I failed my Heavenly Father in my resolve to overcome and heal from SSA.I did feel better after praying and I went on with the rest of the the day.Fellow blog followers and readers,I need some helpful advice.How can I stop giving into the dirty,unclean and impure habit of genital manipulation?If anybody has any ideas to share,please share.I am open to anything.I want to nip this habit in the butt for good,but I don't know how to go about it.If anyone has any suggestions,advice or anything that helped you if you struggled with this particular habit,please share.I am desperate.I want to stop this dirty,unclean and impure habit once and for all.I am sick of giving into this habit and I want to stop it as it has a negative effect on my goals to overcome and heal from SSA.This is a form of acting out on the unnatural desires that I have that are connected with this terrible SSA that I struggle with.Please share any advice or suggestions that you have.If anyone out there has overcome this particular habit,what worked for you as again,I am open to anything.I am also again asking that y'all please continue praying for me and also,please leave me some encouraging words in the comments section and also,please share what has worked for all of you if you also struggled with this particular habit of genital manipulation.As stated,I am open to anything as I really want to stop practicing this particular dirty habit as it isn't helping me in any way to overcome SSA as it is only making the problem worse as this habit isn't a good thing.Please share any advice or suggestions.Thanks in advance to all of you for your continued prayerful and positive verbal support,especially anything that can help me overcome this terrible habit of genital manipulation.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,with the exception of church as usual,I have nothing planned.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes and plans for the day ahead.FJ