Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving onward.I had a pretty fair day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I showered.After my shower,I had my usual quick breakfast and my usual 2 cups of coffee.After breakfast,I did my personal PC work and I got dressed to proceed with the rest of the day,although I couldn't really do too much as a result of the big snow storm that we had yesterday.
Since I couldn't go anywhere as a result of my car being out of commission as a result of me having a compact spare on the rear passenger side,I simply went out to do some snow shoveling and it took me quite a while to get the shoveling done.After that was done,I went back into the house to watch a little TV and relax for a while.
I also had to make a phone call with someone that I worship with in church to give me a ride to church tomorrow.He said that he will pick me up tomorrow.I am glad that I now have a ride to go to church tomorrow.
After eating,I watched the evening news for a while and I did some more personal PC work.Overall,a pretty fair day.I did manage to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
While my rocky road to recovery continues moving onward,I am still,on a daily basis,dealing and struggling with the symptoms of BPD and it's accompanying emotional roller coaster ride.It is never easy dealing and struggling with this type of psychiatric disability and the ups and downs of this ride can be very tiresome.While having emotional ups and downs are bad enough,I also have to deal with the schizophrenic tendencies that I have and that makes my BPD struggles even more difficult.I am still attending my therapy sessions.I am also taking my medication as directed.I am also still continuing to rely more on God and his son Jesus Christ more whenever this particular struggle seems to be getting way too difficult for me to handle.I simply talk about this particular struggle with God in the name of his son Jesus Christ and they both help in sustaining me.It is great that God and his son Christ Jesus help out and give power beyond what any human therapy can give.Thanks to both God and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do.
Regarding my SSA struggles,I was again tempted to masturbate in the wee early morning hours when I was awakened by yet another throbbing erection.I tossed to the opposite side that was laying down in bed and though it took a while,the erection softened and I went back to sleep.Though I escaped this episode,I was tempted as usual to act out by fantasies,lusting and to manipulate my genitals for the purpose of getting near/fully erect or to the point of orgasm and stopping,though at times,a climax does happen when I do that.I kept up in prayer to God all day as these terrible temptations came at me from all sides and I asked God in the name of Christ Jesus for strength to fight and resist these terrible temptations and I always felt better after praying.I am simply trying to draw closer to my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ because I really want to heal from these unwanted temptations and also,from these unnatural sexual desires that I have that are connected with SSA.I kept it up and I felt better every time.It shows me that God and his son Christ Jesus are there to help me whenever I need it and that they are there for me despite what many cynics and non-believers say.It also strengthens my faith and helps keep me going in this fight.While that is great,I am still asking that all of you who regularly follow my blog and read the posts to continue praying for me as I am going through all of this complex emotional stuff.I also ask that you please leave an encouraging word or two for me in the comments section.Your prayers and your encouraging comments both help keep me going in this struggle and make me even more determined to continue on my healing journey from SSA.Please continue in prayer for me and also,please leave an encouraging word or two in the comments section.Thanks in advance to all of you for your prayers and your encouragement.Thanks also to both God and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do.
Tomorrow,now that I have my ride to church,I am planning on attending church and also,the morning's Holy Bible study class an hour and a half before the worship service.As for the rest of the day,as a result of the car problem,I just might stay home and take it easy.
That was my day today and my hopes and plans for the day ahead.FJ