Tonight,my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward.I had a pretty fair day today.
Today,I woke up in the mid morning and I showered.After my shower,I had my usual quick breakfast and my usual 2 cups of coffee.After breakfast,I did my personal PC work.
Today,I was hoping to get out and do a few things,but the weather kept me at home.Today,the weather was rainy,windy and chilly.I simply put a warm sweat suit on and I relaxed for much of the day.I also put a couple of job applications in online and after that,I popped a DVD into the DVD player and I relaxed a bit.Since there was nothing to do today as a result of the weather,I just stayed home and made the best out of it.I popped some popcorn and I relaxed while watching the movie.When that was over,I popped another movie in and relaxed while watching that as well.
After eating,I decided to watch a little TV and did some more personal PC work.Overall,a pretty fair day.I also managed to get some recommended Holy Bible reading done as well.
While my rocky road to recovery continues moving forward,I am still,on a daily basis,dealing and struggling with the symptoms of BPD and it's accompanying emotional roller coaster ride.I also have schizophrenic tendencies and that makes my BPD struggles even more difficult.I am still attending my therapy sessions.I am also continuing to take my medication as directed.I am also still continuing to rely more on my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ whenever this particular struggle seems to be getting way too difficult for me to handle.I simply throw this particular struggle on my Heavenly Father as a burden.I ask him for strength to help me endure through the negatives of this psychiatric double whammy that I struggle with.It is a very difficult and challenging struggle that I have and it never gets any easier.Both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ help in sustaining me and also,I feel much calmer and at ease with them at the helm getting me through.It shows that I am never alone in this particular struggle and that does make me feel only a little bit better as I still have to deal with the negative effects of this psychiatric double whammy nonetheless,but my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ make me feel more at ease and much calmer.Thanks to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
Regarding my SSA struggles,I was again tempted to masturbate during the wee early morning hours when I was awakened by yet another throbbing erection.I sat up for a while and proceeded to get out of bed.I still had a throbbing erection upon rising,so I decided to get off the bed and walk for a little while in the house.Though it was slow going,this made the erection soften.When my genitals were fully soft,I went right back to bed and subsequently to sleep.Though I escaped this episode,I was tempted throughout the day to indulge in sinful lusting and fantasizing of other men.Today,since I stuck at home as a result of the rain and the winds,I was tempted to indulge in sinful lusting and fantasizing of other men.This was because sexual images of men were trying to cloud my mind.I had to really work on myself to rid myself of these terrible images.I went right to my Heavenly Father and I prayed real hard.I asked him for strength to fight and resist these overwhelming urges in the name of his son Jesus Christ.I prayed real hard and after I was finished praying,I felt stronger and the images and the urges disappeared.I am also asking that y'all who follow my blog and read my posts to please keep up praying for me and also,please leave me an encouraging word or two in the comments section.I need both prayerful and positive verbal support.They both help keep me going in this particular fight and struggle.They also help keep both my determination and motivation strong.I need both of these things to help me through all of this as I am still going through a very difficult emotional period.Thanks in advance to all of you for your prayers and your positive verbal encouragement.Thanks also to both my Heavenly Father and his son Jesus Christ for everything that they do and provide.
As for tomorrow,with the exception of church as usual.I have made no other plans.But I hope that whatever I choose to do gives me positive benefits.
That was my day today and my hopes and plans for the day ahead.FJ